Long-time lurker, new search

[Slingerland]

I wante to say "hi" to the group.  I'm a long-time lurker, but my search is starting to go to an active phase.  My issue is picking a country...

I was married to a Korean-American for 15 years, and while I don't speak the language, I am comfortable with the customs.  But my being Catholic makes me think about the Phillipines as well.  I'm not looking for a young girl, but for a woman in her upper 30s/lower 40s.  A woman whose age is closer to mine and can enjoy living in a more rural area.

Anyway, I've enjoyed reading the posts... now it's my turn to jump in the pond and try to swim...

[robert angel]

Welcome, Slinger--looking forward to your posts and maybe learning a bit about life w/ a Korean spouse. Fairly sizable Korean influence in the Philippines too--they're pretty 'business minded' there. Seem people come from China, India, Korea, Japan, etc to the Philippines and do well in business. But I think the Filipino mindset is usually different than those other nation's. I'm kind of stuck on the Philippines, but it is a great big world out there!

[Bill_McC]

Welcome Slinger. You don't happen to play a tenor do you?

http://www.google.com/images?hl=en&sugexp=ldymls&xhr=t&q=slingerland+banjo&cp=13&rlz=1R2GGLL_enUS396&wrapid=tljp129567365019502&um=1&ie=UTF-8&source=univ&ei=OWk6TcbXDsjUgQej1I26CA&sa=X&oi=image_result_group&ct=title&resnum=4&sqi=2&ved=0CDsQsAQwAw&biw=1122&bih=563

Bill

[Jeff S]

Hey Slinger - Always great to have more join in the fun! Welcome.

[z_k_g]

Welcome Slinger!

You should also read old posts and some of the archives, thats how I got up to speed.

Have fun, I think the Philippines is the right choice!

Zulu

[Slingerland]

Robert, have one pice of advice to somebody interested in Korean women... take into account the mileage to the MIL's house.  The closer the MIL, the more she will try to control your life.  And my most important lesson: white Catholic boy and Korean Baptist girl will have a "few bumps" to overcome.  Or not... 

Bill, I was a drummer rather than a banjo player: http://www.gibson.com/absolutenm/templates/FeatureTemplate.aspx?articleid=71&zoneid=2 

[Jeff S]

Gene Krupa style - now there's some real old school!

[Bill_McC]

Bill, I was a drummer rather than a banjo player: http://www.gibson.com/absolutenm/templates/FeatureTemplate.aspx?articleid=71&zoneid=2 

Ahh well I had a 50/50 shot. Musician just the same. Welcome again....

Bill

[Ray]

Hi Sling,

Being basically a Catholic country, the Philippines should make your search easier.

A lot of the Catholic Filipina ladies will want a traditional church wedding, which is a big deal over there. I guess the big question is…were you married in the Catholic Church? If so, then I guess you realize that an annulment will be needed first. If you were married in a civil ceremony only, then that will greatly simplify things if you should decide to marry over there.

There is an abundance of Filipinas in your desired age range who would make wonderful wives. Would you consider having more children?

Have you been to the Philippines yet? If not, why not start planning a vacation trip and check it out.

Ray

[Bob_S]

The closer the MIL, the more she will try to control your life.

Mine is 5907.27 miles from door to door by great circle navigation.  Works out nice!

[Slingerland]

My marriage has been annulled by the Church, so a Catholic church wedding is possible.  And having a common faith is certainly a foundation to build upon. 

At my age (upper 40s) having babies again is not really something I want.  On the other hand, adopting somebody else's young children is a possibility.  I have children of my own, ranging from upper 20s (on her own and married) to high school age.  In case of health or untimely demise, I would worry about leaving behind a widow with young children.

I am not really that familiar with Filipino culture (and food) so that bit of unknown makes me lean towards the Koreans.  Plus travel beween here and South Korea is easier... both for me and for the eventual "her" I want to spend time with.  On the other hand, finding a Catholic Korean is a challenge.

[z_k_g]

I am not really that familiar with Filipino culture (and food) so that bit of unknown makes me lean towards the Koreans. 

Slinger,

I would read up on Korea and Korean women, we are not well liked on the Peninsula.  Of all Asians, including the Thais (which is saying a lot!) the Koreans are the most xenophobic!

Filippino culture is unique, however, they speak English, love everything American, and you will be respected by most everyone you meet there.

Just food for thought!

Zulu

[piglett]

Slinger,

I would read up on Korea and Korean women, we are not well liked on the Peninsula.  Of all Asians, including the Thais (which is saying a lot!) the Koreans are the most xenophobic!

Filippino culture is unique, however, they speak English, love everything American, and you will be respected by most everyone you meet there.

Just food for thought!

Zulu

i have told this story in the past but it's worth repeating IMHO
while in Manila Marily & i had to go to a bunch of places to buy the rest of the things that we would need for the wedding that was to be held in the remote province. at one point we were at some place (i don't recall exactly where) & this really rough looking dude started to stare at me really hard.
i sure as hell didn't like the looks of this at all. I gave the guy a big smile & he smiled back. maybe it was some kind of game he plays with kano's ?
hell if i know but it worked out OK. while there i didn't have 1 person treat me badly, everyone gave me a great deal of respect.


pig

[Capstone]

I would read up on Korea and Korean women, we are not well liked on the Peninsula.  Of all Asians, including the Thais (which is saying a lot!) the Koreans are the most xenophobic!

My personal experiences do not mirror this statement at all. I have visited South Korea on 3 seperate occassions and each time have been treated very well by the Koreans who I came into contact with while there - all were very friendly towards me. Although I didn't visit any areas which surround any of the military bases that the US has there - perhaps in those areas some animosity towards Americans exists.

[z_k_g]

My personal experiences do not mirror this statement at all. I have visited South Korea on 3 seperate occassions and each time have been treated very well by the Koreans who I came into contact with while there - all were very friendly towards me. Although I didn't visit any areas which surround any of the military bases that the US has there - perhaps in those areas some animosity towards Americans exists.

Cap,

I would suggest that he read the blogs, expat websites of people who live there and have a firsthand knowledge of how Koreans think.

I agree with you in terms of being treated well by Koreans.  I have lots of Korean friends and have done business with them also.  Always have been treated well and with respect, they are a very cordial people.

However, that attitude changes when you actually live and work with them in Korea and specifically go after their women. 

There has been a huge backlash against Americans and Brits that teach there in the last few years and this was a national issue for the national elections.  As a result, all new foreign teachers must have a verified degree, a medical exam and a criminal background check, BEFORE, they start working.  Apparently some guy faked his degree as was rumored to have a serious social-pass-along ailment he was giving to Korean females. 

Of course Koreans love tourists, who doesn't, even backward nations like Dubai and the Emirates advertise themselves as tourist hot spots for westerners.  But underneath that glossy veneer the harsh reality is sometimes much different, bottom line, South Koreans really don't like Americans very much.

But, this is just my opinion based on reading the news and keeping up with what's happening from talking with friends other expats who live in SEA.

Caps, experience is just as valid as mine, so do your own research and if it looks good for ya, take a visit to the southern Korean Peninsula and experience it for yourself!

Zulu

[Slingerland]

An interesting development has come up... my employer is asking me to consider a part-TDY job to Russia (mostly Rostov on Don, but occasional trips around Russia.)  It would be for a year, working two weeks there then two weeks back here, back-and-forth.  The increase in money is very tempting, and I would still be able to see my kids frequently (one is still in high school.)

I wonder... maybe I should consider Europe?  

Would a Russian woman in her upper 30s/lower 40s be able to adapt to life in the southern United States?

EDIT: I do not speak Russian, and I've never been there.  I took German in college, and all I remember is "Die mousse ist grau."  My employer is offering a 2 week language bootcamp, plus 1 hour a day language tutoring on site while in Russia.

[jm21-2]

There has been a huge backlash against Americans and Brits that teach there in the last few years and this was a national issue for the national elections.  As a result, all new foreign teachers must have a verified degree, a medical exam and a criminal background check, BEFORE, they start working.  Apparently some guy faked his degree as was rumored to have a serious social-pass-along ailment he was giving to Korean females. 

Faking degrees and going to teach to get laid has been a common theme in just about every Asian country. Hell, in China the school will fake the degree for you!

I can understand that after a certain number of incidents and complaints their government would crack down a bit.

I think that may reflect more poorly on foreign teachers than foreigners in general though. When I suggested I could teach in Taiwan for a bit my fiance kind of gave me a "you want to be one of those foreign teachers drinking all day and chasing after young girls??"-look.

Korean food is good. I wouldn't write it off the list. Can't be more complicated than Japan or Singapore.

[Jeff S]

An interesting development has come up... my employer is asking me to consider a part-TDY job to Russia (mostly Rostov on Don, but occasional trips around Russia.)  It would be for a year, working two weeks there then two weeks back here, back-and-forth.  The increase in money is very tempting, and I would still be able to see my kids frequently (one is still in high school.)

I wonder... maybe I should consider Europe?  

Would a Russian woman in her upper 30s/lower 40s be able to adapt to life in the southern United States?

EDIT: I do not speak Russian, and I've never been there.  I took German in college, and all I remember is "Die mousse ist grau."  My employer is offering a 2 week language bootcamp, plus 1 hour a day language tutoring on site while in Russia.

One of the overriding themes here that almost everyone who both has succeed and those who have failed is that wherever you go, you have to be in-tune with the culture. If the culture of the woman's country is one that is in-line with your own ideas, then great go for it. If not, you are headed for trouble. You have to decide what culture is best for you.

Russian women are often city folks, interested in cultural events, dressing up and dining out, though there are some farm girls in the mix, by and large, if you're into picnics and tractor pulls and she's into the symphony and wearing heels, my guess is that you're starting out on the wrong foot. Each of us is different in what we are looking for. I'm a city guy and get along well with city girls, other guys here don't.

A big cliche here is that the first place to look is always the mirror.

- Jeff

[Researcher]

  JM, Korean food good?I don't think so.I have tried alot of it and the only thing I liked was bulgoki.Other than that the other food was terrible.Nothing has flavor.

    Researcher

[william3rd]

An interesting development has come up... my employer is asking me to consider a part-TDY job to Russia (mostly Rostov on Don, but occasional trips around Russia.)  It would be for a year, working two weeks there then two weeks back here, back-and-forth.  The increase in money is very tempting, and I would still be able to see my kids frequently (one is still in high school.)

I wonder... maybe I should consider Europe?  

Would a Russian woman in her upper 30s/lower 40s be able to adapt to life in the southern United States?

EDIT: I do not speak Russian, and I've never been there.  I took German in college, and all I remember is "Die mousse ist grau."  My employer is offering a 2 week language bootcamp, plus 1 hour a day language tutoring on site while in Russia.

Go there!!! and go there alone. You will learn the culture and have the time to do it right, meeting local girls etc. For a head start, you could look at Elena's Models, an advertiser here and there are some certified agencies approved by the website. A Russian woman in her 30s can adapt just as well as a woman from every other country.

[jm21-2]

  JM, Korean food good?I don't think so.I have tried alot of it and the only thing I liked was bulgoki.Other than that the other food was terrible.Nothing has flavor.

    Researcher

To each their own I guess. It's one of my favorite cuisines. If I was eating Korean BBQ, kim chee, shabu shabu, and so on I would be happy as a clam.

In Qingdao there are a lot of Koreans working there. My Chinese GF and I went to one of the best Korean restaurants I've ever been to there and it was one of the most memorable meals of my life. Awesome to have 13+ side dishes (with free unlimited refills!). The white mushrooms that are so common here in the US (immature portabellos) were really expensive there though.

If you think Korean food is bland, definitely stay away from Taiwanese food....

[Jeff S]

Korean is one of my favorites too. Flavorless is not how I'd describe it at all. But hey - that's what makes horse racing fun.

BTW jm, shabu shabu is Japanese. Japanese food is very popular in Korea - kind of like Italian food in the US.

[Researcher]

  JM, I think bulgoki and barbecue are the same things.I like kim chew as well.But other than that I can't find anything that doesn't taste like Playdoh! Since my employer is a Korean company any suggestions you have would be appreciated.


   Researcher

[Jeff S]

Yes bulgogi is barbecued marinated meat. It comes in beef, pork and chicken. Barbecued beef shortribs are kalbi, another great one.

A few of my regular favorites include soon-dofu (tofu and different kinds of meats or seafood in a beef broth) all of the time and it comes in various stages of spiciness (usually 1-5) I like it a level 4 but you have to judge your own taste from there. Another great dish is bibimbap. If you like kim chee, you'll like it. Beef, spiced vegetables and egg over rice that you mix up to just before eating. Also stir fried squid is a popular one, but is often served scorchingly spicy. Then there's the Korean take on nabemono - fish stews. Much stronger flavors than the equivalent Japanese versions. If you're ever in a really authentic Korean barbecue try the octopus cooked on a pot lid.

[Researcher]

  Thanks Jeff S. I did try squid cooked on hot coals while I was in Korea.Not too bad.They also had boiled silkworms, probably won't do that again.They do serve alot of soups here at work.I may try it when I go to the cafeteria again.They have one section that serves only Korean food.


   Researcher