A Situation versus The Man

[Researcher]

excuse me for a little ad hominem Researcher, but with me you seem obtuse:)

The situation: is what the women is looking for.  Example.  Gringo. No kids.  Doctor or professional.  Don't care about physical appearance.  Not over 40 years of age.  A man that wants to get married at the speed of light, and let me move into his 3 story house in the suburbs.

The man: Any guy looking for a mate.

So, the point of the discussion is how to perceive / negotiate the fact that many / most women are looking for a situation first, and the man is the blank to be filled in.    This is not "normally" how women fall in love with a man for life.   FT made a great point above, which to restate simply says it does not matter how you meet the women, the rules of engagment begin only afterwards.   Bob S chimed in with agreement with the feeling of being interviewed.   I am not trying to KABOSH or insult anybody BTW

    But don't forget you also mentioned women seeking an education.Where do they fit into the discussion? And while You, Bob and others are definitely entitled to your opinions many people don't have a problem with meeting someone feeling like an "interview". As a matter of fact I found it to be a very efficient way of finding women to date.Sure it isn't very romantic to interview someone but if the couple interviewing each other decide to take things further the romance can come later.

    I don't mean to be "obtuse" with you.It is just many times you are very vague in your posts and it is easy to misunderstand your meaning.


    Researcher

[Zon]

ut, there are a ton of serious women going to school / or working,  and overcoming many obstacles every day to do so.   Their lives are hard, and it is natural for intelligent ambitious people to consider a better way ...

My point was to draw a dividing line of sorts between women who have lower character traits and women who have higher character traits.  Thus, those women that go to school / work, and are otherwise future looking and serious, are obviously different from those women who are living in the moment (rather recklessly). 

There is a very good picture that is being drawn here, actually.  There are TONS of warnings and negative alarms that are constantly discussed here.  I myself have been one of the loudest ( maybe even cynical?)  And, that is a direct result of experience, and that includes agency girls.    But, and this is far more important, once an introduction is made and the first 72 hours / 5 days are over ... most guys with salt should start to see the picture clearly.

==== Also, and this may balance much of my past remarks, I ALWAYS understood (at least for me) that until I spoke at least cave man Spanish I was only a mouse in a maze.   So, I passed time and learned.  I enjoyed the entire process, obviously.   But, I have not had "bad" experiences - quite the contrary.  I have WITNESSED a large number of trainwrecks, however. =====

[Researcher]

My point was to draw a dividing line of sorts between women who have lower character traits and women who have higher character traits. 

    So  your aim is to create two categories of women:
1)Women of low character
2)Women of high character
   Hmmm, rather judgemental if you ask me. Why does going to college automatically qualify someone as having high character traits.I have met plenty of people who had plenty of low character traits AND a college degree.

Thus, those women that go to school / work, and are otherwise future looking and serious, are obviously different from those women who are living in the moment (rather recklessly). 

      Not necessarily true.There are many women in the world who still regard being a wife and stay at home mom as a honorable position.You are making the assumption that if a woman isn't in college/working then she is living recklessly. Not true.

    Again, some of the most reckless people I have ever met had a college degree.
     

There is a very good picture that is being drawn here, actually.  There are TONS of warnings and negative alarms that are constantly discussed here.  I myself have been one of the loudest ( maybe even cynical?)  And, that is a direct result of experience, and that includes agency girls.    But, and this is far more important, once an introduction is made and the first 72 hours / 5 days are over ... most guys with salt should start to see the picture clearly.

      You admitted earlier your only experiences in an agency came from simply observation.I imagine it was for a short period of time as well.I spent much longer actually using agencies and can tell you from experience your observations are not completely correct.And I'll say again my experience is from years of actually using agencies so I'm not some "Zonny come lately". hahaha!
 

==== Also, and this may balance much of my past remarks, I ALWAYS understood (at least for me) that until I spoke at least cave man Spanish I was only a mouse in a maze.   So, I passed time and learned.  I enjoyed the entire process, obviously.   But, I have not had "bad" experiences - quite the contrary.  I have WITNESSED a large number of trainwrecks, however. =====

    I've seen plenty of trainwrecks also but I wouldn't say it was from a woman having "low character traits".The majority of the disasters I saw came from the guy not recognizing red flags and even when they did they completely ignored them.

      Researcher

[Zon]

Many of my negative comments arise from meeting Paisas in Medellin, and working girls, and party girls in Cali (hay muchos).  But, there are a ton of serious women going to school / or working,  and overcoming many obstacles every day to do so.   Their lives are hard, and it is natural for intelligent ambitious people to consider a better way ...

ON SECOND thought, I do not want to create a categorical generalization.  That would be false, and not my original intent.  I was simply evidencing SOME of my referencing material.

we can go on like this forever, point / counterpoint. 

One thing that occurred to me earlier in the day is that I bring my own Situation versus the Woman to the game too.   For example, I am not in to fat chicks.  So, if my soul mate is 80 overweight (or even 20) ... we gonna have to wait till next life time.   

So, in the end there are numerous ways to look at this crap.  And, like you are fond of saying, it has all been said before

[Researcher]

    There is nothing wrong with diiscussing generalities. It's just from my experience I can't see where any categories based on Low or High character traits can be formed here. There is such a wide array of degrees when it comes to this and many exceptions to the rules.

    It is just my opinion but I think categorizing people in such a manner is rather judgemental as well.Making assumptions that people not in college/working are not forward thinking isn't correct.

     Again, that is just my opinion.


      Researcher

[fathertime]

My point was to draw a dividing line of sorts between women who have lower character traits and women who have higher character traits.  Thus, those women that go to school / work, and are otherwise future looking and serious, are obviously different from those women who are living in the moment (rather recklessly). 

There is a very good picture that is being drawn here, actually.  There are TONS of warnings and negative alarms that are constantly discussed here.  I myself have been one of the loudest ( maybe even cynical?)  And, that is a direct result of experience, and that includes agency girls.    But, and this is far more important, once an introduction is made and the first 72 hours / 5 days are over ... most guys with salt should start to see the picture clearly.

==== Also, and this may balance much of my past remarks, I ALWAYS understood (at least for me) that until I spoke at least cave man Spanish I was only a mouse in a maze.   So, I passed time and learned.  I enjoyed the entire process, obviously.   But, I have not had "bad" experiences - quite the contrary.  I have WITNESSED a large number of trainwrecks, however. =====

Speaking of trainwrecks...this post is kinda like a trainwreck...I don't understand most of what you are saying here.    You need to settle down, quite being sooooo fussy about these women...I think most of them our pretty nice if they meet the right man.


Fathertime! 

[maritime04]

lord of the flies.....................................................