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Latin International Dating Forums => Latin -> General discussion => Topic started by: ag1987 on October 18, 2018, 03:03:54 PM

Title: Is this crazy?
Post by: ag1987 on October 18, 2018, 03:03:54 PM
Hi all. I've been here for a short period of time, but have lurked in the background as a "guest", simply reading posts.
It seems the forum isn't quite as active as it once was, but a core group still posts regularly - thanks guys (and gals!)!


Would you guys recommend for/against the idea of a foreign wife for a younger guy? I guess I am not that young - am 30. I've never been married before.


Been in the Navy for going on 5 yrs now. Work as a healthcare admin officer - was in Japan for 2 years, now VA for 3, heading to D.C. for 3 yrs next summer. After that, could likely head to Europe or the West Coast (my community seems to keep people moving around vs. homesteading).


I have tried online dating and the usual social outings with friends. Finding that, surprisingly, women are not as enthused about the idea of a military lifestyle and the moving around every few years that comes with that. I can understand and appreciate their concerns - most have college degrees they are still paying off and the idea of having to "start over" every few years isn't ideal. I'm not one to really want a "career woman", either.


Are there any others out there in a similar situation? Just looking to settle down and start a family, etc. I did the crazy stuff in college and my 20s...


Thanks guys for all the discussion!















Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: buenopues4 on October 18, 2018, 03:54:44 PM
Most (not all of course) of the successful marriages I've heard of between a gringo and colombiana involved a younger guy.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: benjio on October 18, 2018, 03:58:38 PM
Hi all. I've been here for a short period of time, but have lurked in the background as a "guest", simply reading posts.
It seems the forum isn't quite as active as it once was, but a core group still posts regularly - thanks guys (and gals!)!


Would you guys recommend for/against the idea of a foreign wife for a younger guy? I guess I am not that young - am 30. I've never been married before.


Been in the Navy for going on 5 yrs now. Work as a healthcare admin officer - was in Japan for 2 years, now VA for 3, heading to D.C. for 3 yrs next summer. After that, could likely head to Europe or the West Coast (my community seems to keep people moving around vs. homesteading).


I have tried online dating and the usual social outings with friends. Finding that, surprisingly, women are not as enthused about the idea of a military lifestyle and the moving around every few years that comes with that. I can understand and appreciate their concerns - most have college degrees they are still paying off and the idea of having to "start over" every few years isn't ideal. I'm not one to really want a "career woman", either.


Are there any others out there in a similar situation? Just looking to settle down and start a family, etc. I did the crazy stuff in college and my 20s...


Thanks guys for all the discussion!


I was 28 when I got started looking SOTB. 28!!!!!! My advice? Get your ass to wherever you're thinking about going and do it now!!! I've never thought of myself as the best looking guy, but when I first went to Colombia I think there was a lot more interest in me because of my age. A 15 or 20 year age gap isn't really a big deal in Latin America and certain parts of Asia. But the simple fact is young women prefer young men. They can love older men but youth is youth. Here's the bad thing: I'm assuming you're in pretty good shape being in the military. If you have all your teeth and a decent head of hair and you went somewhere like Colombia for example, you'll pretty much have some of the hottest women on Earth giving you genuine play. I mean really, really, really, gorgeous, full package dime pieces. I've seen this with younger guys. Those aren't necessarily going to be wife material though. And making the wrong decision can cost you years of heartache, a fortune in cash and assets and perhaps even your sanity. Go down and have fun dating and getting to know the culture while you're young. The women aren't going anywhere. I'm no pedophile but when I hang out with friends and go to social gatherings in Colombia like birthdays parties or Quinces all I see if 13-17 year old girls that are going to grow up to be absolutely gorgeous women. You can tell even when they're that young. So if you dated down there 10 years trying to find the right one it still wouldn't be a waste of time. Probably be quite fun actually.

Sew your royal oats and enjoy your new found playground. Let your wife fall in your lap. Don't try and force her to sit down or let her force you to turn into a chair. Learn the language and build a circle of friends you can trust. Believe me....best decision I ever made. Hands down!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Wildstubby on October 18, 2018, 04:44:25 PM
ag1987 said:
Quote
Hi all. I've been here for a short period of time, but have lurked in the background as a "guest", simply reading posts.
It seems the forum isn't quite as active as it once was, but a core group still posts regularly - thanks guys (and gals!)!


Would you guys recommend for/against the idea of a foreign wife for a younger guy? I guess I am not that young - am 30. I've never been married before.


Been in the Navy for going on 5 yrs now. Work as a healthcare admin officer - was in Japan for 2 years, now VA for 3, heading to D.C. for 3 yrs next summer. After that, could likely head to Europe or the West Coast (my community seems to keep people moving around vs. homesteading).


I have tried online dating and the usual social outings with friends. Finding that, surprisingly, women are not as enthused about the idea of a military lifestyle and the moving around every few years that comes with that. I can understand and appreciate their concerns - most have college degrees they are still paying off and the idea of having to "start over" every few years isn't ideal. I'm not one to really want a "career woman", either.


Are there any others out there in a similar situation? Just looking to settle down and start a family, etc. I did the crazy stuff in college and my 20s...


Thanks guys for all the discussion!

Welcome. I was a swabbie for 6 years and spent almost 5 on a 'flat-top' out of NOB. Having a younger woman is not a crime. Having one that is immature, (regardless of age) is stupid! I can attest what buenospues4 and benjio have said. I have been traveling twice a year to Colombia since the 'cessation' of the 'great war' 3 years ago. I had no confidence with women whatsoever. After being married for 25 years, didn't improve things either. I persevered, learned from the mistakes I made, (you will make some too), but tried to heed the advice of others. If a spouse is what you are looking for, make damn sure this is the one you want to be with. It sux being in a toxic relationship with no egress. Take your time and listen to what others say, not what they tell you specifically to do! You will know when it feels right!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: robert angel on October 18, 2018, 06:52:16 PM
From what I've heard, age 30 is a full on 'prime time' age down there. Younger than that, and women can be worried that you're still sowing your wild oats, full throttle and need a little more time out to pasture before settling down.

They want a 'man'-- not what they see as a playBOY. Not to say that a number of them openly or subconsciously don't want a guy thirty or older, with some macho ' bad boy' left in him-- a lot do. A guy who'll call the shots, so to speak. Don't go down there acting all warm and fuzzy.

It's not 'Mr. Rodgers Neighborhood' LOL...

Getting further up in years and marrying a much younger woman, over time the age difference can become more of an issue. I've been lucky with my much younger wife, but since day one, even before we finally married and since, I've realized that one day it could be problematic.

I'm sure the pleasures and potential pitfalls are the same there, but bringing her to the states increases the potential for the pitfalls.

Some women will not be aware of what being a Military spouse and the typical relocation every few years involves, but some, especially the ones who DO know, probably might find the idea of seeing the world, or even different parts of the USA very appealing. My first cousin worked his way up to Naval Commander rank and enroute, married an incredibly beautiful Middle Eastern woman. They've been very happy.

My wife is exploring working for the Federal Govt.--- hopefully in working in embassies over seas, which involves moving every few years. It's a long shot, but  I think she would love it and I'd probably like it.

But honestly, I think you're in a pretty prime spot. I live in a Military town and see a lot of Army guys, a lot of Rangers, married to extremely beautiful women from S. and C. America, many of them have made families-- children, and seem quite content. They're nice, friendly people that me smile.

I often, if it seems appropriate, thank them for serving our country, explaining that while  I don't often agree with the Commander in Chief from different Presidencies, my respect for our men and women in uniform, and their unwavering commitment, is unwavering in my mind.

Don't doubt yourself and situation too much. Work on your Spanish and go there with the mindset that: " At the very least, I'm going to have a great vacation and see some beeeeyoutifull scenery!!!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: robert angel on October 18, 2018, 08:21:21 PM
Go for it-- and remember:

"You miss 100% of the shots you don't take!

(Wayne, "The Great" Gretsky)
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on October 19, 2018, 10:58:06 AM
The younger the better.

 I agree 100% with Benjios advice. 90 % of women in Colombia for example (and 99.9% in North America).want guys within about 10.to 15 years of their own age. And this is regardless of how in shape and otherwise  attractive an.older guy is.

Take your time, have fun, but if you are serious about having a family, put a time limit on making a decisión.Say age  40 years.

That way , you can.learn the culture, the women., their habits and games, be able to.pick a good one. and wont be thinking with your little head, because you are a " kid in a candy shop."

  Only downside I see is with your career,. Not having enough time and money to travel enough to your country of choice.

You say you were posted in Japan. 2 years Didnt get any interest from  Japanese women? When I visited Japan several years ago,I  talked to a young Canadian.or US guy who had good experience with the women there.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: mambocowboy on October 19, 2018, 11:24:42 AM
The younger the better.

 I agree 100% with Benjios advice. 90 % of women in Colombia for example (and 99.9% in North America).want guys within about 10.to 15 years of their own age. And this is regardless of how in shape and otherwise  attractive an.older guy is.

Take your time, have fun, but if you are serious about having a family, put a time limit on making a decisión.Say age  40 years.

That way , you can.learn the culture, the women., their habits and games, be able to.pick a good one. and wont be thinking with your little head, because you are a " kid in a candy shop."

  Only downside I see is with your career,. Not having enough time and money to travel enough to your country of choice.

You say you were posted in Japan. 2 years Didnt get any interest from  Japanese women? When I visited Japan several years ago,I  talked to a young Canadian.or US guy who had good experience with the women there.
Have fun. Get to know the culture.  Enjoy being with beautiful women so you're judgement isn't clouded  if/when you settle down and you can see a woman for who she really is before risking your financial future, which lets face it, is what you do when you bring a woman to your country for marriage....
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: utopiacowboy on October 19, 2018, 11:58:43 AM
My son was in the Navy for five years and was stationed in Japan for two of those years. He had a nice Japanese girlfriend but he ended up marrying a Korean. He did very well for himself I must say.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: ag1987 on October 19, 2018, 05:14:32 PM
Thanks, all, for you kind words. I've got a call out to Jamie at Latin Introductions to see about availability in January. My hope is to get down there, be able to tell "my story" and go from there. This forum is great and I appreciate everyone's input and discussion. Hope everyone is having a great weekend!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: mambocowboy on October 19, 2018, 06:05:08 PM
Thanks, all, for you kind words. I've got a call out to Jamie at Latin Introductions to see about availability in January. My hope is to get down there, be able to tell "my story" and go from there. This forum is great and I appreciate everyone's input and discussion. Hope everyone is having a great weekend!
welcome and it would be great to see a trip report from Jaime's.  I don't think we've had one in years....
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: JWR on October 21, 2018, 11:17:30 AM
Because you are living in the land of "Supply and demand"  low supply of great women, and high demand, you will likely lose your head when you get to Colombia and want to close the deal within a couple trips.   You just won't be able to wrap your head around the concept that there's more where that came from, and the more experience you have, the better chance you have of being successful.
After some trips and experience down there, you will look back at some of the things you did, and chuckle at your behaviour I guarantee it.
I've used Jamie's agency and had some fun.  I think that's a good jumping off spot.   Think of it as an R & D trip.  Just have fun, and don't put any pressure on any of the interactions.  You have a decade to play with after all.
So you have a bit of time, so buckle down, and learn some Spanish right now.  Put in the work learning Spanish and that will make a huge difference.  Also if you could get some salsa lessons before you get on the plane, you won't feel so awkward.  Go out, dance with the girls, and just enjoy the Latina energy.  It's going to be intoxicating.
Print out Benjo's advice above and read it daily.  He's spot on.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on October 22, 2018, 10:44:12 AM
So Ag1987 ..you have been given lots of the same advice..take your time..measure twice.. but cut once

We dont want to hear you reporting you are dragging the first ( or second or third) gal you meet at Jamies back to the US ..and worst yet a few months or short years later complaining it didnt work out because you "werent compatible...or even worse yet ..you didnt realize when you met her she was a prostitute or web cam.model.or something similar.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: robert angel on October 22, 2018, 02:01:20 PM
So Ag1987 ..you have been given lots of the same advice..take your time..measure twice.. but cut once

We dont want to hear you reporting you are dragging the first ( or second or third) gal you meet at Jamies back to the US ..and worst yet a few months or short years later complaining it didnt work out because you "werent compatible...or even worse yet ..you didnt realize when you met her she was a prostitute or web cam.model.or something similar.

So much has changed, so many agencies completely out of business. I recall a lot of guys saying that different agencies were posting pictures of the same women, women who had 'moved on' years previously.

But Jamie's site has consistently gotten good reviews from seasoned members here. One interesting thing for sure, is that he doesn't paint some sugar coated picture of the women there, in fact what he tells you up front would scare a lot of guys away.

Listening there and here is a good way to approach the inevitable 'learning curve'...
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: ag1987 on October 22, 2018, 05:08:06 PM
Absolutely. Still waiting to hear about the 2nd half of January for a visit - works well with work schedule. He also is direct in his e-mails...a real to-the-point kind of guy...I like that.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: mambocowboy on October 22, 2018, 05:27:48 PM
Absolutely. Still waiting to hear about the 2nd half of January for a visit - works well with work schedule. He also is direct in his e-mails...a real to-the-point kind of guy...I like that.
Yes indeed.  I recommend reading a thread by latinsharpei to see what can happen when a man thinks with the wrong head and doesn't listen to advice....
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: ag1987 on October 23, 2018, 07:16:44 PM
Alright my friends and mentors, am going to Jamie's 17-31 January.
Nice, easy flight via American through Miami to BAQ.


Thanks, mambo, am looking for thread now.


I'll be sure to do a trip report.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: robert angel on October 23, 2018, 07:29:55 PM
Alright my friends and mentors, am going to Jamie's 17-31 January.
Nice, easy flight via American through Miami to BAQ.


Thanks, mambo, am looking for thread now.


I'll be sure to do a trip report.

That'd be great. Last trip report I remember is Neil Armstrong's. And not the movie version: "First Man" either...
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Wildstubby on October 23, 2018, 08:48:30 PM
ag1987 said:
Quote
Alright my friends and mentors, am going to Jamie's 17-31 January.
Nice, easy flight via American through Miami to BAQ.


Thanks, mambo, am looking for thread now.


I'll be sure to do a trip report.
You won't be too impressed by Barranquilla. It looks pretty dirty between the airport and center city. The inner city seems to be cleaner than Santa Marta. I don't know what hotel you have picked out but I stayed at the NH Collection downtown. There was a bank with ATM's right around the corner. A lot of places were within walking distance so you didn't need a cab to go everywhere. Supermarket about a block away. The hotel had a pretty good breakfast however if you don't care for that there is a McDonalds, complete with 'AUTOMAC' (I don't know if you can get fries with that! ;) ), directly across the street. Not sure about the weather. I was there in November last year and there was quite a bit of rain. I've seen videos of the streets turning into 'arroyos'(?) where the cars float down the street with the current! Pretty intense! Question: Who is this Jaime/website?
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: mambocowboy on October 24, 2018, 12:16:58 AM
Alright my friends and mentors, am going to Jamie's 17-31 January.
Nice, easy flight via American through Miami to BAQ.


Thanks, mambo, am looking for thread now.


I'll be sure to do a trip report.
Look forward to it. At 28, you should be able to enjoy some fine ladies in Barranquilla.  Hope you like em curvy, because the women there are thick in all the right places...
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: robert angel on October 31, 2018, 04:58:09 PM
The whole idea of going to BQ, Colombia to find a woman/women does sound and I dare say IS unothodox, but "CRAZY"? --NO.

Not when you have a strong feeling, an attraction for, those women 'down thattaway'....

You're really only going to find them in significant and to an extent, already 'vetted' numbers  in a limited amount of time, by going there and utilizing an effective agency. So adding Jamie to the situation adds even more seniisibility to it all..

Now and once you're there, try and make other friends, networking and broadening your connection base. You never know when a 'friend of a friend ' can lead to gold--that's how I was introduced to my wife.

Do that online, as well as of course 'on the ground' while there. Ya never know, maybe a taxi driver has a niece who's a perfect 'ten', is sweet as the day is long AND is a rocket scientist! The hotel doormen usually know the street meat from the sweet treats too-- the good girls from the bad, and so on. But you have to consider the source. Think....

I hope that Jamie's translator is still the same woman (or someone like her), who seemed to be real good (from what I've heard) at sorting out the flakes and telling guys when she (and Jamie did too) felt to what extent a particular woman was or wasn't a good choice, match for a particular guy (client).

Having such a personal interface, given the language and overall cultural differences requiring 'sorting out', will probably prove valuable.

Just don't rush and over pressure yourself into thinking you HAVE to find THE one woman for you this first trip.

Better to go with the mindset that you're going to have a nice, educational vacation, setting the stage for another trip.

Watch what you eat and drink, as too many guys here took trips and spent most of them sick, green and barfing. Not too good whilst 'dating'...LOL

There's no substitute for allowing adequate time to sort all this relationship stuff out, but going in smart, like it sounds like you are, will most likely be optimal usage of time.

Hard to believe, but your trip's not much more than a couple months away!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: robert angel on October 31, 2018, 06:17:51 PM
Besides, we're ALL a bit crazy around here to start with.

But to a lot of other people around us here in the USA they think we're INSANE!

And never mind them!

"""Always do WHAT YOU WANT and say what YOU feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind. BE WHO YOU ARE and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind""

(A wise quote, actually attributed to several people, including Dr. Seuss)
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: buenopues4 on November 01, 2018, 04:55:14 PM
Should you happen to have an interest in photography and or botany you and Jaime will have a lot to talk about.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: ag1987 on November 02, 2018, 07:17:59 PM
It is pretty wild how soon this is - mixture of emotions really, excited/anxious/a tad nervous? Probably pretty normal given the fact I've never done something like this before. The upcoming holidays will make the time go that much quicker.


I like the perspective of treating it as a R&D or "business" trip. Great advice about not placing pressure on myself "I HAVE TO FIND THE ONE...etc". I am cautiously hopeful that I'll meet one (or a few) who/m will want to continue corresponding after I leave and go from there. I have my objective "non-negotiables" that will hopefully pare down the candidate pool to maximize use of the short time I'll be there. I like Jamie's process of sharing your profile with the women ahead of time. The translator aspect should be beneficial, as you said Robert. I have Fluenz for self-learning Spanish beyond what I remember from High School and, while it is going well, the more complex conversations are something I won't have down in the next 10 weeks.


For those who've been to the area, any restaurants or activities you strongly recommend doing (or not doing, for that matter)? I know Jaime and his staff will have recommendations but always happy to have multiple suggestions.


More to add as I think of it.







Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Wildstubby on November 02, 2018, 08:30:28 PM
ag1987 said:
Quote
It is pretty wild how soon this is - mixture of emotions really, excited/anxious/a tad nervous? Probably pretty normal given the fact I've never done something like this before. The upcoming holidays will make the time go that much quicker.


I like the perspective of treating it as a R&D or "business" trip. Great advice about not placing pressure on myself "I HAVE TO FIND THE ONE...etc". I am cautiously hopeful that I'll meet one (or a few) who/m will want to continue corresponding after I leave and go from there. I have my objective "non-negotiables" that will hopefully pare down the candidate pool to maximize use of the short time I'll be there. I like Jamie's process of sharing your profile with the women ahead of time. The translator aspect should be beneficial, as you said Robert. I have Fluenz for self-learning Spanish beyond what I remember from High School and, while it is going well, the more complex conversations are something I won't have down in the next 10 weeks.


For those who've been to the area, any restaurants or activities you strongly recommend doing (or not doing, for that matter)? I know Jaime and his staff will have recommendations but always happy to have multiple suggestions.


More to add as I think of it
I know exactly how you feel. Listen, I was married for 25 years and stayed true to my matrimonial oath. On the advice of my lawyer, (and fraternal brother), I kept all inclinations of any relationship shaded from my ex. The moment that the divorce was declared final, I started my plans and made my reservations. Like you, I visited other countries when I was in the Navy, but I hadn't touched another woman in close to 27 years! I figured nothing ventured, nothing gained. So, having said all that, I will give you the same advice that the 'Coladmin' at the former colombiahelp.com website gave me: This isn't an exam or a test. Relax and enjoy the moments! Go with the flow and do what comes naturally and you will be ok. Use your common sense and try not to fall to much for the first woman you meet! Colombian women are very affectionate, so it is easy to get caught up in the moment!
Like I said previously, I stayed at the NH Collection in the middle of town. There was a nice Cuban restaurant about 2~3 blocks away There is also a casino and a very large mall there. Other restaurants were close by also. Here's a piece of advice I wish I had learned earlier. My first trip I used my AAA card to get about $500 USD in Colombian pesos for my trip. AAA used Travelex. They took about 11~12% premium for the money exchange. I learned that I could use my debit card and get withdrawals directly from my credit union using the ATMs there. The fees were minimal and decent rates(about 1~3%!). Make sure you tell all your credit card companies AND your financial institutions about your travel plans. Some won't authorize charges from foreign vendors unless they know you are there in advance.  When you go out and about, try to take only the amount of cash you will need for restaurant/café/centro comercial, etc. Most hotels have a safe for you to stash your valuables in. Keep your head on a swivel, and above all, watch out for the traffic!!!!!!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: buenopues4 on November 03, 2018, 06:13:31 PM
I don't know if it's still open and have read it may not be but I always enjoyed visiting the the quirky Museo Romantico in Barranquilla.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: JWR on November 03, 2018, 09:26:01 PM
Hey Ag,
There is nothing that will ruin your trip quicker then getting food poisoning down there.  I lived in Colombia over 2 years in BQ and in Cali, and had my share of dining experiences.
When I was in BQ I got food poisoning / parasite that was so severe I had to be taken out of my apartment on a stretcher, loaded into an ambulance and admitted into the hospital for 3 days.  I got so weak from vomiting and crapping that I couldn't even get out of bed.  Jaime and his girlfriend saved my ass by calling the ambulance, and Jaime's girlfriend sat with me in the hospital for a long time watching over me.  It was bad, I was scared, and I thought I was going to die.  That parasite gave me problems for a few years, and wasn't killed until a hospital stay in the US on IV vancomycin.

So I'm not trying to scare you here, but this is not the time to be all open minded and trying all sorts of strange foods you're not used to.  You can get it from lettuce on just a hamburger washed in contaminated water.  You can get it from going to your girlfriend's house, and throwing some ice in your rum and cokes that were made from bad water.  Glasses washed in contaminated water.....who the hell knows.  Drink out of bottles and cans.  It's too bad because there's alot of very delicious foods down there and after you relax a bit, you want to start eating everything.

There is nothing that will kill your sex drive quicker then getting sick.
I'm so traumatized, I might eat power bars and imported packaged foods prepared in my own apartment next time I go down there.  Take your girlfriend out to eat and eat hot soup!  At least everything has been boiled and cooked before you eat it.  Let her order 1st so she gets what she wants, then order something cooked and safe like pasta....Eat chicken, or steak, and keep the damn salad away from your plate.  Skip the smoothies.  Who knows what they wash that fruit in.  I'm pretty sure not bottled water.

I know I'm not the only guy on this board that got there ass kicked by bad food down there.  Guys go down there, and are afraid of violent crime.......ha ha ha....it's the food that scares me.

When and if the chips go down, Jaime will have your back.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: buenopues4 on November 04, 2018, 05:35:34 AM
Wow that's a scary story. I wonder what you were infected with. Did the doctors ever tell you? I got Giardia there once after eating lunch at someone's house in Solidad. Yes do be careful.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: JWR on November 04, 2018, 08:40:22 AM
Yea going out to lunch at your girlfriend’s house can lead straight to the bano....  You eat and drink what they put in front of you to be respectful.  They have their own natural defenses built up.


I think I had a bad parasite, and the problem is Doctors in the US don’t diagnose this because it’s rare up here.  You come back from Colombia with severe abdominal pain, and they want to operate on your intestines to look around.  Not good.  I think I got mine from ice at a New Years Eve party.


I swore I would never return to BQ but of course now I’m ready to go back.....
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Wildstubby on November 04, 2018, 10:48:38 AM
JWR said:
Quote
Yea going out to lunch at your girlfriend’s house can lead straight to the bano....  You eat and drink what they put in front of you to be respectful.  They have their own natural defenses built up.


I think I had a bad parasite, and the problem is Doctors in the US don’t diagnose this because it’s rare up here.  You come back from Colombia with severe abdominal pain, and they want to operate on your intestines to look around.  Not good.  I think I got mine from ice at a New Years Eve party.


I swore I would never return to BQ but of course now I’m ready to go back.....
One thing you have to remember is that probably could have happened anywhere, even here in the US. Many places especially in the Caribbean, Central, and South America utilize human and other animal waste as fertilizer on crops and fruit. Case in point: When I was in the Navy, we made a stop in St. Thomas, VI. We had an outbreak of Hepatitis A. An investigation found that it was caused by a Mess Specialist, (food server/preparer) who had a strawberry daiquiri at a particular bar. Further they learned that human waste was used to fertilize the strawberry plantation. But you are correct you never know. I always purchase travel insurance, (which covers upto $5MM) in medical costs.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: JWR on November 04, 2018, 05:52:35 PM
Travel insurance is not a bad idea especially for a medical evac. My ambulance ride and 3 days in the hospital with IV drugs was all under $500.00.  Good health care at reasonable prices in Colombia.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: ag1987 on November 06, 2018, 08:00:20 PM
Great call on travel insurance and cautious approach to food/beverage consumption. Thankfully (well, it goes two ways), being in the Navy, I am covered under TRICARE and a contract program called International SOS. I work in healthcare in the Navy and have worked with ISOS in the past for MEDEVACs of Sailors and Marines. They are a worldwide network of clinical providers and MEDEVAC teams and, should something bad happen to me, I would be EVAC'd back to the states. The downside of the Navy is the downright intrusiveness of planning and being approved for foreign travel to a non-1st world country/NATO ally. A ton of training modules and what seems like everyone needs to know every detail of my travel. I get it, we have to be accounted for, but it is downright nuts compared to what a regular Joe would have to work with.


As an update, I've provided Jamie responses to his website questionnaire and sent in recent photos. I had to peruse his site and make initial selections. I used a search query of age 24-34 (I am 30), non-smoker, no kids. I myself am never married, no kids. I am pretty boring and don't really have much baggage. My biggest hurdle (and a big driver of seeking someone outside of the US) is the moving around thing - a career-minded woman in something that isn't mobile is going to have to start over every few years at a new location. I can see the writing on the wall 8-10 years down the line...SO is given a promotion at a job she loves, then I'm told I'm being sent to the other coast of the U.S. or even better, to Japan or Europe.


Tried to find women whose (albeit limited) profile hinted towards a willingness to live outside of Colombia and move every few years as I am assigned new jobs. Some clearly state that they are studying towards a professional degree or that they desire to start businesses in their country. Their honesty is appreciated and I was able to pare down the list submitted to Jamie to approx. 20 in Barranquilla and a handful who are outside of the city. I'll keep you all posted. I'm just over 2 months out from this adventure!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Wildstubby on November 06, 2018, 08:36:11 PM
ag1987 said:
Quote
Great call on travel insurance and cautious approach to food/beverage consumption. Thankfully (well, it goes two ways), being in the Navy, I am covered under TRICARE and a contract program called International SOS. I work in healthcare in the Navy and have worked with ISOS in the past for MEDEVACs of Sailors and Marines. They are a worldwide network of clinical providers and MEDEVAC teams and, should something bad happen to me, I would be EVAC'd back to the states. The downside of the Navy is the downright intrusiveness of planning and being approved for foreign travel to a non-1st world country/NATO ally. A ton of training modules and what seems like everyone needs to know every detail of my travel. I get it, we have to be accounted for, but it is downright nuts compared to what a regular Joe would have to work with.


As an update, I've provided Jamie responses to his website questionnaire and sent in recent photos. I had to peruse his site and make initial selections. I used a search query of age 24-34 (I am 30), non-smoker, no kids. I myself am never married, no kids. I am pretty boring and don't really have much baggage. My biggest hurdle (and a big driver of seeking someone outside of the US) is the moving around thing - a career-minded woman in something that isn't mobile is going to have to start over every few years at a new location. I can see the writing on the wall 8-10 years down the line...SO is given a promotion at a job she loves, then I'm told I'm being sent to the other coast of the U.S. or even better, to Japan or Europe.


Tried to find women whose (albeit limited) profile hinted towards a willingness to live outside of Colombia and move every few years as I am assigned new jobs. Some clearly state that they are studying towards a professional degree or that they desire to start businesses in their country. Their honesty is appreciated and I was able to pare down the list submitted to Jamie to approx. 20 in Barranquilla and a handful who are outside of the city. I'll keep you all posted. I'm just over 2 months out from this adventure!
The fact that you will be providing to any prospective spouse, solid income, paid medical and dental, and perks that come with military life, (access to NAVEX, MAC flights), will be inviting to somebody who is just starting out. I suspect you are career minded. Also, you didn't say whether you are officer or enlisted. The perks or RHIP for officer/sr. enlisted, are even more alluring. Who knows. You may meet someone from a military family also!
BTW, I'm heading to Bogota then Ibague for a week on Friday.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: mambocowboy on November 06, 2018, 08:37:14 PM
Great call on travel insurance and cautious approach to food/beverage consumption. Thankfully (well, it goes two ways), being in the Navy, I am covered under TRICARE and a contract program called International SOS. I work in healthcare in the Navy and have worked with ISOS in the past for MEDEVACs of Sailors and Marines. They are a worldwide network of clinical providers and MEDEVAC teams and, should something bad happen to me, I would be EVAC'd back to the states. The downside of the Navy is the downright intrusiveness of planning and being approved for foreign travel to a non-1st world country/NATO ally. A ton of training modules and what seems like everyone needs to know every detail of my travel. I get it, we have to be accounted for, but it is downright nuts compared to what a regular Joe would have to work with.


As an update, I've provided Jamie responses to his website questionnaire and sent in recent photos. I had to peruse his site and make initial selections. I used a search query of age 24-34 (I am 30), non-smoker, no kids. I myself am never married, no kids. I am pretty boring and don't really have much baggage. My biggest hurdle (and a big driver of seeking someone outside of the US) is the moving around thing - a career-minded woman in something that isn't mobile is going to have to start over every few years at a new location. I can see the writing on the wall 8-10 years down the line...SO is given a promotion at a job she loves, then I'm told I'm being sent to the other coast of the U.S. or even better, to Japan or Europe.


Tried to find women whose (albeit limited) profile hinted towards a willingness to live outside of Colombia and move every few years as I am assigned new jobs. Some clearly state that they are studying towards a professional degree or that they desire to start businesses in their country. Their honesty is appreciated and I was able to pare down the list submitted to Jamie to approx. 20 in Barranquilla and a handful who are outside of the city. I'll keep you all posted. I'm just over 2 months out from this adventure!
I know a Navy guy married to a Barranquillera. They have a small  child together and move around a bit. She seems to have no problem with it.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: ag1987 on November 06, 2018, 09:13:22 PM
ag1987 said:The fact that you will be providing to any prospective spouse, solid income, paid medical and dental, and perks that come with military life, (access to NAVEX, MAC flights), will be inviting to somebody who is just starting out. I suspect you are career minded. Also, you didn't say whether you are officer or enlisted. The perks or RHIP for officer/sr. enlisted, are even more alluring. Who knows. You may meet someone from a military family also!
BTW, I'm heading to Bogota then Ibague for a week on Friday.


Nice, have fun and let us know how it goes!


I'm an Officer (LT), I am a Healthcare Administrator in the Medical Service Corps.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: benjio on November 06, 2018, 10:56:08 PM
I know a Navy guy married to a Barranquillera. They have a small  child together and move around a bit. She seems to have no problem with it.

Always a roll of the dice with Barranquilleras. In the 25-35 age group you’ll find some very well educated, financially responsible, hardworking young ladies with realistic life goals. Then there’s the not so educated, never left the barrio, not interested in bettering themselves outside of a tit job and a$$ injections that tend to find it a bit more difficult to acclimate to cultures outside of their own. Both types of women can genuinely fall in love with you, but there are some obvious hurdles that come with a certain type. The most difficult IMHO being her family’s expections with respect to financial assistance.

Bogotañas for example, tend to be a bit more driven on average. At the very least willing to work. The regional stereotypes in Colombia exist for good reason. For the uneducated Colombian the U.S. is some paradise with unlimited, 6 figure jobs and sending home a few hundred dollars a month to improve upon the family’s lifestyle shouldn’t be an issue. They will go as far as calling you cheap or selfish when these requests are met with refusal. These are the girls that have a friend of a friend that married a gringo that came to Colombia, bought her family a house, opened a business for them and still sends home millions of pesos a month for the greater good. I’ve never actually met that guy. On the other hand, the right woman will not only love you more intensely and deeply than you’ve ever been loved before, but will also see moving outside of her country as an opportunity for her to help her own family and raise her kids with the potential of a better future.

I’ve dated both types and everything in between. 3 girls from Jamie’s agency throughout the years and a couple I met through friends or on my own. My advice is don’t rush and make sure you get to know her and her family like the back of your hand. Nothing wrong with sending a few bucks back home if you’re financially able, but the question always needs to be asked, “What would they do if I wasn’t here to help?”
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: mambocowboy on November 06, 2018, 11:46:28 PM
Always a roll of the dice with Barranquilleras. In the 25-35 age group you’ll find some very well educated, financially responsible, hardworking young ladies with realistic life goals. Then there’s the not so educated, never left the barrio, not interested in bettering themselves outside of a tit job and a$$ injections that tend to find it a bit more difficult to acclimate to cultures outside of their own. Both types of women can genuinely fall in love with you, but there are some obvious hurdles that come with a certain type. The most difficult IMHO being her family’s expections with respect to financial assistance.

Bogotañas for example, tend to be a bit more driven on average. At the very least willing to work. The regional stereotypes in Colombia exist for good reason. For the uneducated Colombian the U.S. is some paradise with unlimited, 6 figure jobs and sending home a few hundred dollars a month to improve upon the family’s lifestyle shouldn’t be an issue. They will go as far as calling you cheap or selfish when these requests are met with refusal. These are the girls that have a friend of a friend that married a gringo that came to Colombia, bought her family a house, opened a business for them and still sends home millions of pesos a month for the greater good. I’ve never actually met that guy. On the other hand, the right woman will not only love you more intensely and deeply than you’ve ever been loved before, but will also see moving outside of her country as an opportunity for her to help her own family and raise her kids with the potential of a better future.

I’ve dated both types and everything in between. 3 girls from Jamie’s agency throughout the years and a couple I met through friends or on my own. My advice is don’t rush and make sure you get to know her and her family like the back of your hand. Nothing wrong with sending a few bucks back home if you’re financially able, but the question always needs to be asked, “What would they do if I wasn’t here to help?”
Totally agree. There are other types of landmines too though. The girl who's married to the Navy guy somehow decided it'd be great to become a Jehovah's Witness AFTER she came to the US and married him. He's not thrilled about that but what can he do about it?....
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Wildstubby on November 07, 2018, 04:18:58 AM
ag1987 said:
Quote
I'm an Officer (LT), I am a Healthcare Administrator in the Medical Service Corps.

No doubt some extra perks there and greater as your career advances. Just do your diligence and don't expect to find #1 right out of the gate. You are going to spend a lot of time, money, and heartache. But if you stick to your game plan, I'm sure you will come out on top with a winner!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on November 07, 2018, 12:39:13 PM
Great call on travel insurance and cautious approach to food/beverage consumption. Thankfully (well, it goes two ways), being in the Navy, I am covered under TRICARE and a contract program called International SOS. I work in healthcare in the Navy and have worked with ISOS in the past for MEDEVACs of Sailors and Marines. They are a worldwide network of clinical providers and MEDEVAC teams and, should something bad happen to me, I would be EVAC'd back to the states. The downside of the Navy is the downright intrusiveness of planning and being approved for foreign travel to a non-1st world country/NATO ally. A ton of training modules and what seems like everyone needs to know every detail of my travel. I get it, we have to be accounted for, but it is downright nuts compared to what a regular Joe would have to work with.


As an update, I've provided Jamie responses to his website questionnaire and sent in recent photos. I had to peruse his site and make initial selections. I used a search query of age 24-34 (I am 30), non-smoker, no kids. I myself am never married, no kids. I am pretty boring and don't really have much baggage. My biggest hurdle (and a big driver of seeking someone outside of the US) is the moving around thing - a career-minded woman in something that isn't mobile is going to have to start over every few years at a new location. I can see the writing on the wall 8-10 years down the line...SO is given a promotion at a job she loves, then I'm told I'm being sent to the other coast of the U.S. or even better, to Japan or Europe.


Tried to find women whose (albeit limited) profile hinted towards a willingness to live outside of Colombia and move every few years as I am assigned new jobs. Some clearly state that they are studying towards a professional degree or that they desire to start businesses in their country. Their honesty is appreciated and I was able to pare down the list submitted to Jamie to approx. 20 in Barranquilla and a handful who are outside of the city. I'll keep you all posted. I'm just over 2 months out from this adventure!

Really watch out for the ones that "want to start their own business"

Usually is code for " I have stupid ideas to waste money on, and I need some dumb gringo to help me out by giving me his money to waste on this nonsense"
Same with "professionally educated" women. Most degrees in Colombia arent worth the paper they are written on, almost everyone is studying or has a degree, but unemployment is high , and very few people ( women espescially) are working in their profession.

If you want a "successful"woman, look for one who  already works in her profession or has a successful.business.

However dont know how much of this  is important to you as you are looking for somone to relocate and live with you in various locations around the world.

On a related and interesting side note, the funniest profile I ever saw on Latam Cupid was a Paisa (37..already hit the wall) who said she was a "successful  business woman who had a degree in international business                            ( administracin de negocios internacionales) had a successful business for 7 years with several clients.

She said what she was looking for was a " Man to support her, emotionally and financially, buy her a car and house and invest his money in her "successful business".LMAOF

When I asked her if my interpretación of her words were correct, she confirmed it. I then  ssked her " Are you crazy?Are you trying to scare guys away, cuz you sure are scaring me! "She then got offended and called me a loser (cuz she assumed I had no money) and a "tacaño" and blocked me.

Hilarous.The nerve of some people .Muy descarada! 






Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on November 07, 2018, 12:45:33 PM
JWR said:One thing you have to remember is that probably could have happened anywhere, even here in the US. Many places especially in the Caribbean, Central, and South America utilize human and other animal waste as fertilizer on crops and fruit. Case in point: When I was in the Navy, we made a stop in St. Thomas, VI. We had an outbreak of Hepatitis A. An investigation found that it was caused by a Mess Specialist, (food server/preparer) who had a strawberry daiquiri at a particular bar. Further they learned that human waste was used to fertilize the strawberry plantation. But you are correct you never know. I always purchase travel insurance, (which covers upto $5MM) in medical costs.
They use Human wate as fertilizer in California and elsewhere..all.over

It has been through several bio- digestor processes.

Ask scumbuster in the other site. He knows all about that stuff.He worked for CH2MHill.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: robert angel on November 07, 2018, 01:40:51 PM

Watch what you eat and drink, as too many guys here took trips and spent most of them sick, green and barfing. Not too good whilst 'dating'...LOL


Again. And even staying away from ice cubes, worry about how plates and glasses were washed... Stay away from anything like fruit, salads. Forget about street food (it's easy to momentarily 'forget') and make sure IF you DO eat anything cooked, make damn sure that's it's well done. Or else YOU'll end up 'well done' in a bad way....

Always pack imodium, antibiotics and pocket sized packs of kleenex.  Lots of bottled water, you'll need hydration anyways. I  travel with beef jerky, dried fruit, other light weight, USA bought snack foods....
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: mambocowboy on November 07, 2018, 02:00:03 PM
Really watch out for the ones that "want to start their own business"

Usually is code for " I have stupid ideas to waste money on, and I need some dumb gringo to help me out by giving me his money to waste on this nonsense"
Same with "professionally educated" women. Most degrees in Colombia arent worth the paper they are written on, almost everyone is studying or has a degree, but enemployment is high , and very few people ( women espescially) are working in their profession.

If you want a "sucsessful"woman, look for one who  already works in her profession or has a sucsessful.business.

However dont know how much of this  is important to you as you are looking for somone to relocate and live with you in various locations around the world.

On a related and interesting side note, the funniest profile I ever saw on Latam Cupid was a Paisa (37..already hit the wall) who said she was a "sucsessful  business woman who had a degree in international business                            ( administracin de negocios internacionales) had a sucessful business for 7 years with several clients.

She said what she was looking for was a " Man to support her, emotionally and financially, buy her a car and house and invest his money in her "sucsessful business".LMAOF

When I asked her if my interpretación of her words were correct, she confirmed it. I then  ssked her " Are you crazy?Are you trying to scare guys away, cuz you sure are scaring me! "She then got offended and called me a loser (cuz she assumed I had no money) and a "tacaño" and blocked me.

Hilarous.The nerve of some people .Muy descarada!
Totally agree. You need to read between the lines with alot of them, although paisa was easier than most to figure out...
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on November 07, 2018, 04:03:34 PM
They use Human wate as fertilizer in California and elsewhere..all.over

It has been through several bio- digestor processes.

Ask scumbuster in the other site. He knows all about that stuff.He worked for CH2MHill.


I only ever got sick (worth noting anyway-as far as food poisoning) once in Colombia. This is after living here 6 and a half years, and travelling here extensively  since 2004.

But then I have spent a third of my life living in developing countries so my stomach is pretty hardened.

In the Cities in Colombia the water is pretty safe.Its not like the Philipines. I drink from the tap water always. Only time I avoid it is in some of the pueblos, and even then , I avoid it only if the locals tell me to avoid it.

The time I did get sick was on the coast in Santa Marta at a fish restaurant.

They story some guy told me is that they freeze and ship all the fresh fish for consunmers in Bogota and Medellin, and the restaurants get the left over stuff that lays around, unfrozen ( sometimes for a few days) for the restaurants to seĺl to the tourists to eat.

I was sick with diahrea for about 5 days and lost about 3 or 4 kg, but survived and recovered...didnt even go to the doctor.

On another ocasión , however, my friend (Paisa from Mainizales) and I ate ceviche from a vendor in a little hut on the beach. I was Ok, had no effect what so ever, but my friend was so sick, he had deliruim tremors,had to be hospitalized, have intraveneous injections, and lost about 6 kg.

Watch out for the seafood on the coast, I guess.

Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on November 07, 2018, 04:14:58 PM
Again. And even staying away from ice cubes, worry about how plates and glasses were washed... Stay away from anything like fruit, salads. Forget about street food (it's easy to momentarily 'forget') and make sure IF you DO eat anything cooked, make damn sure that's it's well done. Or else YOU'll end up 'well done' in a bad way....

Always pack imodium, antibiotics and pocket sized packs of kleenex.  Lots of bottled water, you'll need hydration anyways. I  travel with beef jerky, dried fruit, other light weight, USA bought snack foods....

I think this is a bit too.paranoid for Colombia in 2019. This is not the Democratic Republic of Congo..


I eat everything here, just like back home(well.this is my home now.. ).you name it..I eat it..

The only time I ever got sick (worth noting anyway-as far as food poisoning) once in Colombia. This is after living here 6 and a half years, and travelling here extensively  since 2004.

But then I have spent a third of my life living in developing countries so my stomach is pretty hardened.

In the Cities in Colombia the water is pretty safe.Its not like the Philipines. I drink from the tap water always. Only time I avoid it is in some of the pueblos, and even then , I avoid it only if the locals tell me to avoid it.

The time I did get sick was on the coast in Santa Marta at a fish restaurant.

They story some guy told me is that they freeze and ship all the fresh fish for consunmers in Bogota and Medellin, and the restaurants get the left over stuff that lays around, unfrozen ( sometimes for a few days) for the restaurants to seĺl to the tourists to eat.

I was sick with diahrea for about 5 days and lost about 3 or 4 kg, but survived and recovered...didnt even go to the doctor.

On another ocasión , however, my friend (Paisa from Mainizales) and I ate ceviche from a vendor in a little hut on the beach. I was Ok, had no effect what so ever, but my friend was so sick, he had deliruim tremors,had to be hospitalized, have intraveneous injections, and lost about 6 kg.

Watch out for the seafood on the coast, I guess.

Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: robert angel on November 07, 2018, 06:26:05 PM
You indicate spending a third of your life in third world hell holes and half a dozen or so years in Colombia, so for sure you've  gotten the 'herd' or 'tribal' immunity effect to the environment/s.

I'm vacinated for just about everything you can stick in a person anyhow--hep. etc.

Even me, after a few weeks in the Philippines, and I'm drinking the water and eating just about everything, even street food if it's cooked enough.

But my work all around this area, traveling thru 3rd world like parts of Georgia, has done the same. I probably don't want to know what my blood's lead level is. For starters in life, I chewed the lead paint off of the crib....

But I still travel with a variety of nice, legally prescribed pharmacy drugs, my own t.p. and more, 'just in case'....
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Wildstubby on November 07, 2018, 08:47:48 PM
Robert_angel said:
Quote
ou indicate spending a third of your life in third world hell holes and half a dozen or so years in Colombia, so for sure you've  gotten the 'herd' or 'tribal' immunity effect to the environment/s.

I'm vacinated for just about everything you can stick in a person anyhow--hep. etc.

Even me, after a few weeks in the Philippines, and I'm drinking the water and eating just about everything, even street food if it's cooked enough.

But my work all around this area, traveling thru 3rd world like parts of Georgia, has done the same. I probably don't want to know what my blood's lead level is. For starters in life, I chewed the lead paint off of the crib....

But I still travel with a variety of nice, legally prescribed pharmacy drugs, my own t.p. and more, 'just in case'....
Ok, how's a balut?
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: robert angel on November 07, 2018, 09:15:34 PM
Robert_angel said:Ok, how's a balut?

Better than that swarmy durian fruit. That's some. nasty stuff. I'd rather drink old hookah water. I have no earthly idea why the chinese are going totally batsh!!t over the stuff, but they're actually driving the price and availibility bonkers..

Besides eating it 'straight up' in large quantities, they are putting it into an unbelievable variety of food and drinks.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: robert angel on November 08, 2018, 09:58:07 AM
Better than that swarmy durian fruit. That's some. nasty stuff. I'd rather drink old hookah water. I have no earthly idea why the chinese are going totally batsh!!t over the stuff, but they're actually driving the price and availibility bonkers..

Besides eating it 'straight up' in large quantities, they are putting it into an unbelievable variety of food and drinks.

Article below purports export of this gawdawful stuff to china said to exceed a billion dollars, says they're making durian "McFlurrys" & hotcakes, Pizza Hut offering it as a topping (and I thought the black, squid ink 36 inch filipino pizzas is nasty enough), speculating them adding it to baby formula...

https://www.google.com/amp/amp.abc.net.au/article/10143766
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: utopiacowboy on November 08, 2018, 11:40:28 AM
Really watch out for the ones that "want to start their own business"

Usually is code for " I have stupid ideas to waste money on, and I need some dumb gringo to help me out by giving me his money to waste on this nonsense"
Same with "professionally educated" women. Most degrees in Colombia arent worth the paper they are written on, almost everyone is studying or has a degree, but unemployment is high , and very few people ( women espescially) are working in their profession.

If you want a "successful"woman, look for one who  already works in her profession or has a successful.business.

However dont know how much of this  is important to you as you are looking for somone to relocate and live with you in various locations around the world.

On a related and interesting side note, the funniest profile I ever saw on Latam Cupid was a Paisa (37..already hit the wall) who said she was a "successful  business woman who had a degree in international business                            ( administracin de negocios internacionales) had a successful business for 7 years with several clients.

She said what she was looking for was a " Man to support her, emotionally and financially, buy her a car and house and invest his money in her "successful business".LMAOF

When I asked her if my interpretación of her words were correct, she confirmed it. I then  ssked her " Are you crazy?Are you trying to scare guys away, cuz you sure are scaring me! "She then got offended and called me a loser (cuz she assumed I had no money) and a "tacaño" and blocked me.

Hilarous.The nerve of some people .Muy descarada!


You are absolutely right. Before she left Medellin, my wife supervised hundreds of people in the textile plants in Itaqui. Now she supervises hundreds of people in the Toyota plant in San Antonio. Basically she is doing the exact same work she used to do just for a lot more money.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: iambboy8012 on November 08, 2018, 07:18:01 PM
You’ll have a blast ag, just go with an open mind, and don’t get caught up in the beauty of the women and how affectionate there are. I used Jaime last year, I will say the process is crazy, after three days I was exhausted of meeting women. I didn’t meet the one, but made a few very good friends, where when I went to Bogota, they flew up and introduced me to there friends up there, and are planning to show me Medellin when I go back for Carnival at the end of Feb. Just work on your Spanish a little, I don’t speak it but understand it, so as long as have the basics you’ll be good on your trip. Hope to see a trip report. I’m planning on doing one this time after my 30 day excursion at the end of Feb.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: MariaJBueno on November 09, 2018, 05:24:58 PM
Really watch out for the ones that "want to start their own business"

Usually is code for " I have stupid ideas to waste money on, and I need some dumb gringo to help me out by giving me his money to waste on this nonsense"



Couldn't have said better myself.   ;)
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: fathertime on November 09, 2018, 10:01:34 PM
Thanks, all, for you kind words. I've got a call out to Jamie at Latin Introductions to see about availability in January. My hope is to get down there, be able to tell "my story" and go from there. This forum is great and I appreciate everyone's input and discussion. Hope everyone is having a great weekend!
Assuming Jaime's is the same as it once was, you will have a lot of incredibly attractive women in front of you.  At your age of 30, you are going to likely be golden.  All this will be intoxicating so knowing that in advance, perhaps you can prepare yourself to not get too carried away with the first lady you find attractive at the expense of at least taking a look at a few others.   


Fathertime!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on November 10, 2018, 09:10:51 AM
I still dont know why you didnt have any luck or
experience with wmen  in Japan.

Very cute women there.most beautiful.of all.the Asian women.Very feminin, not spoiled by feminism, and not third World desperate

You are a young guy, not n old farts like some of us here.What happened?
Care to elaborate?


Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: ag1987 on November 10, 2018, 04:45:18 PM
Fair question, elexpat.


Okinawa was a great tour. 2 years there with some of the best snorkelinging anyone could ask for. It is much different than mainland Japan, though, as it is the poorest prefecture. Okinawans are some of the most prideful people, almost to a fault. I dated a few, but never found one who was thinking long-term. The guys that I know who are happily married to an Okinawan are ones who met them at the tail-end of their military careers and were able to extend their time on island until they were retirement-eligible and then went ahead and retired on island.


I'd go back again someday, for sure.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: ag1987 on November 13, 2018, 04:44:35 PM
Update: Looks like my profile has been sent out to the women I screened - my understanding is the "last updated" on the woman's profile means that 1) they stopped by the office 2) they were contacted 3) ?? - while it doesn't really mean anything, will be interesting to see who would like to meet me in person when I head down there. I'm doing my best to resist wanting to write to them - meeting in person is how I want to do this.


Hope everyone is having a solid week.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: benjio on November 13, 2018, 10:26:06 PM
Update: Looks like my profile has been sent out to the women I screened - my understanding is the "last updated" on the woman's profile means that 1) they stopped by the office 2) they were contacted 3) ?? - while it doesn't really mean anything, will be interesting to see who would like to meet me in person when I head down there. I'm doing my best to resist wanting to write to them - meeting in person is how I want to do this.


Hope everyone is having a solid week.

Last updated (at least when I was still using the agency) usually meant the last time they spoke with the girl over the phone. They will ask them about their relationship status to make sure they’re still single, contact info verification, etc. Believe it or not a lot of these girls lose their phones frequently and have to get new numbers, forget the passwords to their email/social media accounts then create new ones and Jamie does an awesome job at trying to keep all their info up to date. Keep in mind though that many of these women are extremely flaky. One will agree to meet you before you get there, then completely ghost the agency when you arrive. Another thing that happened to me was girls that turned me down during the pre-trip selection process saw me in person and were suddenly interested. Jamie will put as many women in front of you as possible. Some that chose you. Others that may not have even been on the site. Myself and a lot of other guys I met down there actually tapped out. Like, “that’s enough!! I don’t want to meet anyone else!!” DON’T DO THAT!!! It’s a numbers game and that’s why his system works. The more you meet, the more likely you are to genuinely click with someone. You may spend two weeks there, meet 15 girls, then meet your dream girl 7 or 8 days in because she couldn’t get off work before that.

My recommendation: Don’t contact anyone before you go down. You can email, call, facetime...WHATEVER!!! Then when you get there and you and the girl are actually in each other’s presence, no chemistry at all!!! Or even worse...you’re totally into her and she’s not feeling you or vice versa!! Don’t build up any false hopes online. There is no substitute for one on one, in person contact and communication.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: mambocowboy on November 13, 2018, 10:46:57 PM
Last updated (at least when I was still using the agency) usually meant the last time they spoke with the girl over the phone. They will ask them about their relationship status to make sure they’re still single, contact info verification, etc. Believe it or not a lot of these girls lose their phones frequently and have to get new numbers, forget the passwords to their email/social media accounts then create new ones and Jamie does an awesome job at trying to keep all their info up to date. Keep in mind though that many of these women are extremely flaky. One will agree to meet you before you get there, then completely ghost the agency when you arrive. Another thing that happened to me was girls that turned me down during the pre-trip selection process saw me in person and were suddenly interested. Jamie will put as many women in front of you as possible. Some that chose you. Others that may not have even been on the site. Myself and a lot of other guys I met down there actually tapped out. Like, “that’s enough!! I don’t want to meet anyone else!!” DON’T DO THAT!!! It’s a numbers game and that’s why his system works. The more you meet, the more likely you are to genuinely click with someone. You may spend two weeks there, meet 15 girls, then meet your dream girl 7 or 8 days in because she couldn’t get off work before that.

My recommendation: Don’t contact anyone before you go down. You can email, call, facetime...WHATEVER!!! Then when you get there and you and the girl are actually in each other’s presence, no chemistry at all!!! Or even worse...you’re totally into her and she’s not feeling you or vice versa!! Don’t build up any false hopes online. There is no substitute for one on one, in person contact and communication.
What Benjio said.... and what Jaime writes on his website about coastal colombian culture is aff pot on too...
...
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Wildstubby on November 14, 2018, 05:21:41 AM
Having spent more time with costeñas than piasas or rolas, I tend to agree. I kind of wish I would have known about Jaime's website in the beginning. But then I feel I found a pretty good one here in Ibague.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: ag1987 on November 14, 2018, 01:18:59 PM
Last updated (at least when I was still using the agency) usually meant the last time they spoke with the girl over the phone. They will ask them about their relationship status to make sure they’re still single, contact info verification, etc. Believe it or not a lot of these girls lose their phones frequently and have to get new numbers, forget the passwords to their email/social media accounts then create new ones and Jamie does an awesome job at trying to keep all their info up to date. Keep in mind though that many of these women are extremely flaky. One will agree to meet you before you get there, then completely ghost the agency when you arrive. Another thing that happened to me was girls that turned me down during the pre-trip selection process saw me in person and were suddenly interested. Jamie will put as many women in front of you as possible. Some that chose you. Others that may not have even been on the site. Myself and a lot of other guys I met down there actually tapped out. Like, “that’s enough!! I don’t want to meet anyone else!!” DON’T DO THAT!!! It’s a numbers game and that’s why his system works. The more you meet, the more likely you are to genuinely click with someone. You may spend two weeks there, meet 15 girls, then meet your dream girl 7 or 8 days in because she couldn’t get off work before that.

My recommendation: Don’t contact anyone before you go down. You can email, call, facetime...WHATEVER!!! Then when you get there and you and the girl are actually in each other’s presence, no chemistry at all!!! Or even worse...you’re totally into her and she’s not feeling you or vice versa!! Don’t build up any false hopes online. There is no substitute for one on one, in person contact and communication.


Great gouge, benjio. Many of the profiles I sent back to Jamie are now updated with very recent dates, despite some being 3+ months old per "last updated". Looks like a couple have fallen off the site...probably found someone or are not interested in being in the agency anymore. Your last sentence is spot on, for sure.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: mambocowboy on November 14, 2018, 01:28:15 PM

Great gouge, benjio. Many of the profiles I sent back to Jamie are now updated with very recent dates, despite some being 3+ months old per "last updated". Looks like a couple have fallen off the site...probably found someone or are not interested in being in the agency anymore. Your last sentence is spot on, for sure.
True story. My wife was skyping for months with a gringo who ultimately visited Barranquilla. The moment she met him in person she felt no chimica. She felt he was way more attractive on skype than in person and that was the end of the relationship....  There is no substitute for meeting people in person...
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on November 14, 2018, 01:45:59 PM
True story. My wife was skyping for months with a gringo who ultimately visited Barranquilla. The moment she met him in person she felt no chimica. She felt he was way more attractive on skype than in person and that was the end of the relationship....  There is no substitute for meeting people in person...

Even worse case with the women..what with foto stop and whatever.
Some cal May look really.hot on Instagram..but in real.life..what a horrible ogre
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: ag1987 on November 22, 2018, 07:18:17 PM
Hope you all had/are enjoying the holiday. Spending time with my folks in FL - enjoying the warm weather as compared to Virginia.


Jamie sent me his travel guide (very comprehensive and echoes the comments made here by you all) and said he'd update me on profile responses sometime this week. I find myself checking e-mail a bit more than I normally would...ugh. Excited but also trying to stay calm, the trip is still just under a couple months from now...
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: buenopues4 on November 23, 2018, 02:49:04 PM
Sounds promising. He's a pretty good photographer and probably takes the pictures of the girls himself.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: benjio on November 24, 2018, 02:07:28 PM
Hope you all had/are enjoying the holiday. Spending time with my folks in FL - enjoying the warm weather as compared to Virginia.


Jamie sent me his travel guide (very comprehensive and echoes the comments made here by you all) and said he'd update me on profile responses sometime this week. I find myself checking e-mail a bit more than I normally would...ugh. Excited but also trying to stay calm, the trip is still just under a couple months from now...

HA!!!! Man I remember that feeling. Try to stay calm though. You’ll have to get used to the fact that there’s no such thing as a sense of urgency in Latin America. The culture simply doesn’t take time that seriously. 8 o’clock to them means Anytime in between 9 and 11:30. It just is what it is. Even if you try to complain they won’t respond well and bitching about the value of your time in Colombia will actually get you labeled as an a$$hole. Jamie and his staff will continue to follow up and follow up and follow up again but these women move at their own pace. Also keep in mind that the approaching holidays will probably only delay responses further. Girls will be spending time with family and friends, enjoying their time off work and/or studies. Responding to agency emails will probably be the last of their concerns right now.

I might be wrong...who knows. Just my experience with the culture this time of year.

Now let me give you another little tidbit. I’m sure you sent Jamie a detailed description of yourself and answered all the profile questions he sent you. Here’s the thing though. I’d say 80% of the chicks don’t read all of what you wrote or don’t read any of it!! They look at your photo and decide in a couple of seconds. Any woman you date or are introduced to during a meeting that references something specific from your profile is someone you probably want to pay extra special attention to (if you’re attracted to her of course). There are so many reasons why I say this but I’m sure you can guess the most important ones.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: robert angel on November 24, 2018, 04:04:31 PM
Ha, sounds like life where my wife's from--especially when you get out in the provinces. 'Time' is either daytime or nighttime.  "Schedule?"---good luck. "Hopefully this week or sometime this month" are common refrains.

Weather wise,  it's either hot OR cold, rainy OR dry.

They don't sweat about stuff they can't change or if it really doesn't matter a whole lot either way.

Meanwhile, in the USA, the MOST watched channel is the Weather Channel.

Even in Manila and other major cities, parades and many "official" events rarely start close to any exactly 'scheduled' time.

Delays in getting professional educational, professional exam results and certification permits back are beyond ridiculous. That land exists in it's  own time warp zone....
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: mambocowboy on November 24, 2018, 04:55:26 PM
HA!!!! Man I remember that feeling. Try to stay calm though. You’ll have to get used to the fact that there’s no such thing as a sense of urgency in Latin America. The culture simply doesn’t take time that seriously. 8 o’clock to them means Anytime in between 9 and 11:30. It just is what it is. Even if you try to complain they won’t respond well and bitching about the value of your time in Colombia will actually get you labeled as an a$$hole. Jamie and his staff will continue to follow up and follow up and follow up again but these women move at their own pace. Also keep in mind that the approaching holidays will probably only delay responses further. Girls will be spending time with family and friends, enjoying their time off work and/or studies. Responding to agency emails will probably be the last of their concerns right now.

I might be wrong...who knows. Just my experience with the culture this time of year.

Now let me give you another little tidbit. I’m sure you sent Jamie a detailed description of yourself and answered all the profile questions he sent you. Here’s the thing though. I’d say 80% of the chicks don’t read all of what you wrote or don’t read any of it!! They look at your photo and decide in a couple of seconds. Any woman you date or are introduced to during a meeting that references something specific from your profile is someone you probably want to pay extra special attention to (if you’re attracted to her of course). There are so many reasons why I say this but I’m sure you can guess the most important ones.
Yeah, remember you are paying to travel and for Jaime's services.  These chicas don't have the same investment (actually nothing except their time). And as Benjio said  quimica is very important.  They live for the moment and will know instantly whether they are attracted to you....
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: buenopues4 on November 24, 2018, 05:43:10 PM
Ditto comments above. The girls on the cupido sitse rarely read a guy's profile page. Don't spend a lot of time on that.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: ag1987 on November 24, 2018, 06:58:57 PM

Great to log in and see so much activity in the thread! I received an e-mail from Jamie earlier this afternoon with a nice spreadsheet of the selections I made a couple weeks ago (18 days, actually). I wound up choosing 29 profiles, 22 are in Barranquilla and the remainder from other cities within Colombia. Of these:

14 are not interested, 14 are, and 1 is evidently "unavailable". Kudos to Jamie as the "unavailable" gal is now no longer appearing on the website.

Of the 14 who are interested, 8 are from Barranquilla and 6 are outside the area. I'll send messages to those 6, converse with and get to know them, then decide if I'd like to meet them in person when I am there in January. I'm pleasantly surprised to see just how cheap airfare is within country (< $100 RT) should one or more of these be intriguing after talking a bit.

Things moving along!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Calipro on November 24, 2018, 11:28:20 PM

Jamie sent me his travel guide (very comprehensive and echoes the comments made here by you all) and said he'd update me on profile responses sometime this week. I find myself checking e-mail a bit more than I normally would...ugh. Excited but also trying to stay calm, the trip is still just under a couple months from now...



Years ago I considered using Jamie's agency.
I sent him 50 bucks, pics of myself along with personal info. and list of the women I was interested in.


When he got back to me with the women that were interested in seeing me. I decided not to go.
None of the women I was really attracted to were interested in meeting me and I was doing better in Cali than the ones that did want to meet me.


The only thing I can say about Jaime's agency is that he is honest.....he could have easily bait and switched me if he wanted to.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: robert angel on November 24, 2018, 11:33:20 PM
Great to log in and see so much activity in the thread! I received an e-mail from Jamie earlier this afternoon with a nice spreadsheet of the selections I made a couple weeks ago (18 days, actually). I wound up choosing 29 profiles, 22 are in Barranquilla and the remainder from other cities within Colombia. Of these:

14 are not interested, 14 are, and 1 is evidently "unavailable". Kudos to Jamie as the "unavailable" gal is now no longer appearing on the website.

Of the 14 who are interested, 8 are from Barranquilla and 6 are outside the area. I'll send messages to those 6, converse with and get to know them, then decide if I'd like to meet them in person when I am there in January. I'm pleasantly surprised to see just how cheap airfare is within country (< $100 RT) should one or more of these be intriguing after talking a bit.

Things moving along!

From what's been posted here, it appears that if you're of open mind (and it sounds like you are) you can solicit Jamie's opinion, meaning get his 'read' on how a particular girl he knows sizes up, based on her 'particulars,' what he knows about you and how suitable one gal VS another might be for you.

While not sure of who's helping with translation services  lately, but I've even heard that person has been similarly helpful in the past.

Sometimes even the most experienced, well traveled guys can lose a bit of objectivity when a super lovely woman turns on her charms....Also, of course on first dates, inevitably we're all on somewhat artifical 'best behavior' ~~ all 'acting' out in a bit of a 'la la' land atmosphere.

So having an additional objective person/s to hopefully offer reality checks, can be useful.

Pretty valuable intel---you're paying for it, might as well utilize it!!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on November 25, 2018, 03:17:12 PM
Great to log in and see so much activity in the thread! I received an e-mail from Jamie earlier this afternoon with a nice spreadsheet of the selections I made a couple weeks ago (18 days, actually). I wound up choosing 29 profiles, 22 are in Barranquilla and the remainder from other cities within Colombia. Of these:

14 are not interested, 14 are, and 1 is evidently "unavailable". Kudos to Jamie as the "unavailable" gal is now no longer appearing on the website.

Of the 14 who are interested, 8 are from Barranquilla and 6 are outside the area. I'll send messages to those 6, converse with and get to know them, then decide if I'd like to meet them in person when I am there in January. I'm pleasantly surprised to see just how cheap airfare is within country (< $100 RT) should one or more of these be intriguing after talking a bit.

Things moving along!


Maybe you should look at some others and try and get the numbers up for the girls  inside Baranquilla ...to acount for last minute "flaking"..

Its always much more pressure going down just for a week.or two. If you live permanently or several months at léast in Colombia..you can do your own thing and meet girls on the side..2 or.3 a week..in a year you.might have met a  hundred and had a few relationships  along the way so you get to.know the culture , the women and what you want.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: ag1987 on November 25, 2018, 04:04:25 PM
That is a concern of mine, expat. I asked Jamie if these girls who said yes know I am coming in January and planned to be at the intro event...I assume so, as I put it on my profile but who knows how much they actually read. Agree that being > 30 days away, there's a chance for something else to come up or someone else to come along.


For any that used Jamie's service, were any of your selections from out of the area? Did you wind up meeting any of them in BAQ? His suggestion was to email and correspond with them to see if there is a desire to fly them to BAQ...
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: utopiacowboy on November 26, 2018, 11:09:24 AM
His suggestion was to email and correspond with them to see if there is a desire to fly them to BAQ...


When I read that last line I was thinking isn't this like flying in some ice to the Inuit?
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: robert angel on November 26, 2018, 11:10:02 AM
With all the flakes, and some from the agency will probably be 'no shows', try and have back up options at all times, places. Time allowing, and it appears you've checked prices, check time logistics to travel outside of BQ if you have time aside of time your're paying to utilize agency.

It's increasingly slim pickings online , but having contact info for women there that you've met online never hurts either. I've had to make changes 'on the fly' right before flying and even during multi week stays abroad whilst already there and I was certainly happy that I'd cultivated online friendships abroad beforehand.

I've gone abroad with one woman as a 1st choice, then realized 'wrong choice' and in the span of a couple weeks, ferried and flied to multiple cities, islands, etc. As you indicated, the price of travel once you're there, is so comparitively low, you might as well do some, errr 'sight seeing' anyway!

Love, relationships are like lightning, you never know where,  how or when you're  gonna  get hit.

But maximizing your exposure doesn't hurt. Be careful, but maintain an open mind regarding options.

 'A friend of a friend' proved to be my golden opportunity.

Word up: Regardless, you're probably going to need a vacation after this vacation!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on November 26, 2018, 02:16:26 PM
Take a flight to Medellín if there are girls there.

Enjoy the city. Take girls with you to show you.around.

Get back Up.girls on the Cupid sites


Also Cartagena and Santa Marta are close..can take a bus there..or bus the chicas in

You realize B'quilla  is the ugliest city in Colombia right?
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Wildstubby on November 26, 2018, 03:40:58 PM
Elexpatriado said:
Quote
You realize B'quilla  is the ugliest city in Colombia right?
I don't think you are close with that statement. I found Santa Marta ugly and dirty!

My friend that used to run a website about Colombia had the chutzpah to talk girls up right in the malls. He said he didn't have any problems with dates. I was never blessed with that kind of confidence. However, if your Spanish is passable and you have the nerve, hell why not? Most certainly no prejudices and the adventure of winging it.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: robert angel on November 26, 2018, 07:48:59 PM
Elexpatriado said:I don't think you are close with that statement. I found Santa Marta ugly and dirty!

My friend that used to run a website about Colombia had the chutzpah to talk girls up right in the malls. He said he didn't have any problems with dates. I was never blessed with that kind of confidence. However, if your Spanish is passable and you have the nerve, hell why not? Most certainly no prejudices and the adventure of winging it.

Anyplace where a woman is shopping, or in other words, receiving 'retail therapy', chances are she's gonna be in a good mood. Prime time to summon up courage to hit on them. If it's the truth, tell her something like, "Those shoes/ that outfit looks great on you, it really works"---"That's a classic look, great right now, and I bet it'll look as great five years from now on you--Smart".

Those kind of lines have worked in a number of nations without fail. Women LOVE fashion compliments!

Twelve days ago, I saw a babe, probably 30 years my junior, carrying an end table out the door of a dept store.

This black beauty was an eleven on a scale of TEN. Seriously instaboner material. I smiled sweetly and said: " Can I help you with that, young lady?" She smiled her Ms. Universe smile and with a flutter of her eyelashes replied:, Why yes, that would be sweet of you, thank you".

The Louis Vuitton purse should've tipped me off, but at the end of the parking lot was her car, a pearl white $100,000+ Mercedes S550. Only the 12 cylinder S600 costs more. Her outfit, a Gucci workout suit. Her sneakers were cute. I said so and asked: Yeezeys? (Adidas ) she smiled and said, "No, LeBrons"

I oh so carefully eased the table into the backseat and asked, "Pretty car--how has this Benz been for you?" She mentioned "My Mother and  I just got back from a year in Sierra Leone (Africa) and the car's air suspension is acting weird after sitting for a year".

Me: "Oh, Sierra Leone--THAT explains why you're sooo beautiful--that country has, for it's size, an amazing amount of international beauty contest winner and finalists. It's also a place I'd like to visit some day".

We made a little more small talk about her car, options on fixing it-- the dealership, which I explained is a 'stealership' or the NAPA shop I take my Lexus LS to, which is much fairer and fixes Mercedes too. I gave her the name and location.

Anyways, as we parted, I said:

"You are such a nice and lovely lady. If I were twenty five year's younger, I'd ask for your phone number"

She replied, "NO---YOU seem very nice, I think I like you. Seriously, let me give you my number, please"....

By this time, I felt and probably looked more like a sheep than a wolf, a wolf reciting in his head "and lead us not into temptation"-- But I listened, as she slowly, verbally gave me her phone number. I again told her to consider my repair shop and wished her the best for the upcoming holidays.

As I walked away, she said: "And WHAT's my phone number? NAILED, I stopped dead in my tracks, and I confessed I hadn't memorized it."I'm awful with numbers" I mumbled. She repeated it and asked me to recite it.  '"Say it back to me"...

As I walked back to the store, my balls sweating, my knees close to knocking, I purposefully thought of random numbers, mixing them all up, like 8,12,97,82, 9, 54....intent on forgetting this incredible babe and her number, telling myself that what'd at best probably be a supernova date or two flash and burn, would destroy my marriage to an already beautiful and perhaps even younger woman, namely my wife, a wonderwoman waiting at home for (late as usual) me, preparing my dinner.

I got home and  over that dinner, confessed the whole incident. My wife laughed SO hard, I thought she was gonna fall out of her chair, in between saying "I've told you you still have it honey, I love you now and will still, even when the day comes that you don't have that "It factor" any longer, but that's a funny story."

Then, bless her heart, she added: "You should have remembered her number to see if Patrick and her would hit it off" (a best friend of mine who's officially, legally single)

Nope. THAT number was TOO hot for me to handle!!

And you guys are talking about how comparitively ugly various cities in Colombia are like it's an ugly Christmas sweater contest!

Fellas, we're not out there scoping the landscape. Screw the landscape. No, on second thought, screw the women there!

 No matter how rough the city, the village, the war zone etc., a beautiful woman IS there waiting, as sure as a song writer once wrote:

"There is a rose in Spanish Harlem"
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: benjio on November 27, 2018, 04:26:07 AM
That is a concern of mine, expat. I asked Jamie if these girls who said yes know I am coming in January and planned to be at the intro event...I assume so, as I put it on my profile but who knows how much they actually read. Agree that being > 30 days away, there's a chance for something else to come up or someone else to come along.


For any that used Jamie's service, were any of your selections from out of the area? Did you wind up meeting any of them in BAQ? His suggestion was to email and correspond with them to see if there is a desire to fly them to BAQ...

I used his agency to meet a couple of girls in Bogota. One I developed sort of a relationship with (3 dates...slept together a few times). Keep in mind I was living in Colombia at the time though. You’ll have your hands more than full in Barranquilla. Believe me. You’ll be turning girls away there long before you’ll be worried about going to other cities. Leave Medellin alone for now. That’s expert level!!! Learn Spanish and get to know the culture and the women better first. Let the agency babysit you for now. Paisas will eat you alive!!!! (Jk....but really not.)
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: mambocowboy on November 27, 2018, 12:52:27 PM
I used his agency to meet a couple of girls in Bogota. One I developed sort of a relationship with (3 dates...slept together a few times). Keep in mind I was living in Colombia at the time though. You’ll have your hands more than full in Barranquilla. Believe me. You’ll be turning girls away there long before you’ll be worried about going to other cities. Leave Medellin alone for now. That’s expert level!!! Learn Spanish and get to know the culture and the women better first. Let the agency babysit you for now. Paisas will eat you alive!!!! (Jk....but really not.)
My wife has mentioned several times the paisas and Calenas are way more sophisticated in their manipulation than the Barranquilleras and that they are more ambitious.  I agree for a gringo first time visitor  BAQ is a safer place to start with the ladies, although all you have to do is read LatinSharpei's epic thread to see it's possible for a gringo to get raked over the coals in BAQ. But that guy didn't listen to you or Jaime's warnings about her...
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on November 27, 2018, 02:08:59 PM
My wife has mentioned several times the paisas and Calenas are way more sophisticated in their manipulation than the Barranquilleras and that they are more ambitious.  I agree for a gringo first time visitor  BAQ is a safer place to start with the ladies, although all you have to do is read LatinSharpei's epic thread to see it's possible for a gringo to get raked over the coals in BAQ. But that guy didn't listen to you or Jaime's warnings about her...

All , Or the vast majority of Colombian women are manipulative. They were raised in that environment.If you have no rights and no physical strength, you have to use other means to get what you want..

Ir just depends how often , how big the issue is, and how evil the intent is of the manipulation .
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: buenopues4 on November 27, 2018, 05:17:30 PM
All , Or the vast majority of Colombian women are manipulative. They were raised in that environment.If you have no rights and no physical strength, you have to use other means to get what you want..

Ir just depends how often , how big the issue is, and how evil the intent is of the manipulation .


This is a silly narrative. Women worldwide are manipulative when they have the wits to be so. Colombian women are no more so than any other group of women in the world. It always boils down to "I'll give you sex if you give me money, goods, influence or failing those safe haven for my offspring."
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: mambocowboy on November 27, 2018, 06:28:37 PM

This is a silly narrative. Women worldwide are manipulative when they have the wits to be so. Colombian women are no more so than any other group of women in the world. It always boils down to "I'll give you sex if you give me money, goods, influence or failing those safe haven for my offspring."
Yes but the gringos' naivete and ignorance of Colombian culture makes them more ripe to be taken advantage of than by an American woman whose culture they are more familiar with...
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on November 27, 2018, 08:23:27 PM

This is a silly narrative. Women worldwide are manipulative when they have the wits to be so. Colombian women are no more so than any other group of women in the world. It always boils down to "I'll give you sex if you give me money, goods, influence or failing those safe haven for my offspring."

I dont know..my sister and a lot of women I know in Canada arent that way.

When it comes to.manipulation she is just   like me..better just be a straight shooter and say what you want and dont play games

She actually is with some deadbeat guy because she doesnt want to be alone. He makes less money than he does.

Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on November 27, 2018, 08:32:05 PM
Yes but the gringos' naivete and ignorance of Colombian culture makes them more ripe to be taken advantage of than by an American woman whose culture they are more familiar with...

I am really sensitive to.manipulation..I can smell it a mile away...the girls sometimes dont realize themselves they are doing it.

If its a little thing..and the relationship.is going good otherwise..sometimes its just better to give in and not worry about it , rather than getting all stressed out and participating in the stupid  mind games.

But you still keep a mental score card, and if it happens too frenquently, the "sh1t bucket" in one hand can eventually outweigh the "honey bucket" in the other hand
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Researcher on November 28, 2018, 04:00:01 AM
Elexpatriado said:I don't think you are close with that statement. I found Santa Marta ugly and dirty!

My friend that used to run a website about Colombia had the chutzpah to talk girls up right in the malls. He said he didn't have any problems with dates. I was never blessed with that kind of confidence. However, if your Spanish is passable and you have the nerve, hell why not? Most certainly no prejudices and the adventure of winging it.

I always found Colombianas to be very approachable. One of the chicas I used to chat up in Bogota worked at a gas station near the hotel I usually stayed in. She was super hot and friendly. Most latinas are very flirty if they are available. They usually curtail the flirting once they get a boyfriend. I was always comfortable talking to latinas I did not know. If I screwed up and said something wrong it was usually written off as me being some goofy foreign guy who didn't know better.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: mambocowboy on November 28, 2018, 07:48:01 AM
I always found Colombianas to be very approachable. One of the chicas I used to chat up in Bogota worked at a gas station near the hotel I usually stayed in. She was super hot and friendly. Most latinas are very flirty if they are available. They usually curtail the flirting once they get a boyfriend. I was always comfortable talking to latinas I did not know. If I screwed up and said something wrong it was usually written off as me being some goofy foreign guy who didn't know better.
All this talk of manipulation aside, I would rather deal with Colombianas all day than gringas  that's for sure...I prefer sweet over bitter...
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: robert angel on November 28, 2018, 12:54:55 PM
My wife has mentioned several times the paisas and Calenas are way more sophisticated in their manipulation than the Barranquilleras and that they are more ambitious.  I agree for a gringo first time visitor  BAQ is a safer place to start with the ladies, although all you have to do is read LatinSharpei's epic thread to see it's possible for a gringo to get raked over the coals in BAQ. But that guy didn't listen to you or Jaime's warnings about her...

Yes,  LatinSharpei's posts right up to his last few (too bad he disappeared back in 2014) is well worth a look here. That said, generalizations about women, the differences according  to where they come from etc., are just that - 'generalizations'.

I think more than anything, it's the internet and it's availability, that has changed the playing field for pursuing women in foreign places.

It's simply a smaller world now, where once internet access might be limited and only in Internet cafes, now home PCs and internet  linked cell phones have brought information, including the good, the bad and the ugly, to places where perhaps before, the women were less informed and more innocent.

Even in rural areas, most women are by now aware of the 'hit and run' guys,  of women who have borne children from foriegn guys they'll never see again, etc.

Like Eagles sang:

"City girls just seem to find out early. How to open doors with just a smile. A rich old man. And she won't have to worry. She'll dress up all in lace and go in style. Late at night a big old house gets lonely....."

They might become 'jaded' faster in metro areas but all around, the 'learning curve has picked up.
 
And increasingly in a 'tit for tat' sort of dynamic, these women, who are aware of the dude's done dirty deeds, are doing the same. Both sides, male and female alike, are always, uh, 'refining' their skills in getting over on the other side.

Nope, Polly Anna, ain't what and where she used to be....

From LSP's last post:

"""Things I failed at before

I was willing to commit on thier terms..  I forgot who all was dealt a hand in the poker match

I kept buying into the same excuse its a cultural difference.  Never accommodated to me.

I was blinded by the birds and stars on the one and she was finding reasons to leave early and acting weird on dates.  I should have cut her lose and chose one of the other 2 that are now married.""""
http://www.planet-love.com/index.php?action=profile;area=showposts;u=5005
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on November 28, 2018, 07:23:14 PM
All this talk of manipulation aside, I would rather deal with Colombianas all day than gringas  that's for sure...I prefer sweet over bitter...

Of course anyone would..your sexual market  value jumps about   5 times in Colombia.

In develoed countries, the only guys in their 60s who have a 20 years old girlfriend or wife are billionaires or rock stars like Jimmy Page or Robert Plant.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on November 28, 2018, 07:35:16 PM
Yes,  LatinSharpei's posts right up to his last few (too bad he disappeared back in 2014) is well worth a look here. That said, generalizations about women, the differences according  to where they come from etc., are just that - 'generalizations'.

I think more than anything, it's the internet and it's availability, that has changed the playing field for pursuing women in foreign places.

It's simply a smaller world now, where once internet access might be limited and only in Internet cafes, now home PCs and internet  linked cell phones have brought information, including the good, the bad and the ugly, to places where perhaps before, the women were less informed and more innocent.

Even in rural areas, most women are by now aware of the 'hit and run' guys,  of women who have borne children from foriegn guys they'll never see again, etc.

Like Eagles sang:

"City girls just seem to find out early. How to open doors with just a smile. A rich old man. And she won't have to worry. She'll dress up all in lace and go in style. Late at night a big old house gets lonely....."

They might become 'jaded' faster in metro areas but all around, the 'learning curve has picked up.
 
And increasingly in a 'tit for tat' sort of dynamic, these women, who are aware of the dude's done dirty deeds, are doing the same. Both sides, male and female alike, are always, uh, 'refining' their skills in getting over on the other side.

Nope, Polly Anna, ain't what and where she used to be....

From LSP's last post:

"""Things I failed at before

I was willing to commit on thier terms..  I forgot who all was dealt a hand in the poker match

I kept buying into the same excuse its a cultural difference.  Never accommodated to me.

I was blinded by the birds and stars on the one and she was finding reasons to leave early and acting weird on dates.  I should have cut her lose and chose one of the other 2 that are now married.""""
http://www.planet-love.com/index.php?action=profile;area=showposts;u=5005

I had a quick glance of some of his posts.They give me a headache. Maybe cuz I already have one.ja ja

Anyway..I agree 100% on his  synopsis on female lawyers.stay the foch away from them..horrible creatures..
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: robert angel on November 29, 2018, 09:55:04 AM
Besides generalizations about women based on the area they come from and really, about the female species as whole, IMO we ought to be looking for the 'exceptions' to these self defeating notions regarding the gender as a whole, and the area they're from.

We can piss, moan, demean and lable them, but the work and it's end results are "on us'. Nobody held a gun to our head and said "That one".

Regardless of where you are in the world, with the vast, unprecedented amount of information available to women pretty much everywhere today, sifting thru a lots buckets of dirt and sand, finding the real gold and not the 'fool's gold' is just harder than ever.

As much as us guys do, more women than ever before also have preconceived notions about US that overall, don't do us any good. Sure their, like our perceptions, are based on what they've heard, read, seen and sometimes experienced personally, but when ever you write off something altogether, you're putting blinders on.

No, don't ignore life's lessons. Learn and try to never forget, but don't close doors and windows completely while moving forward, based on what you've left behind.

But then as now, the fact remains that all too often, we're 'blinded by beauty' and will overlook faults in a woman who's incredibly hot, and do that more so than we would in a lady who's merely very pretty.

AND YOU guess which type is gonna be a better fit over the years, the probably lower maintenance pretty lady or the outrageously hot princess, used to being looked up at, on her pedestal. 

Coming off a bitter divorce with two young sons in the wreckage, it took me FOUR years of communicating with my now wife, to get over 'preconceived notions' --trying to convince myself, "too young, too pretty, too nice and well educated"--must stay away, before I considered my wife 'vetted', sufficiently risk reduced and only then, did I propose. Actually, she finally gave me an ultimatum! Everybody, everything, has a 'shelf life'.

The chance of that ever happening again and me landing a similar wife, are for this coot,  probably less than winning the lotto.

And regardless, once they move out of their country, their 'appeal'- their 'fair market value' WILL increase. My wife knows that if she left me, she could not only survive financially independently, but between her workplace (which fortunately is not an immoral issue/place for married folks) and the community at large, she'd have zero problems lining up suitors.

So once the girl you choose moves here and she becomes 'established', YOU may suddenly seem like less of a 'catch' after all. Perhaps a totally unnecessary nuisance in fact. Maybe even more like a convenient stepping stone or dalliance. A 'tool'.

So pray that you picked someone with a good head on her shoulders, steady, consistent, with "sticktuitiveness".

And ain't nobody gonna wait 4 years for nobody anymore, but still, take the TIME necessary.

"If you wanna be happy for rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife-- take it from a personal point of view, get an ugly girl to marry you" (LOL]

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Qh9ZZgDqzAg
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: JWR on November 29, 2018, 05:18:44 PM
What I've noticed spending some time and dating in the Philippines over the last 5 years is how many single girls are 25 to 30, and have reached an age that they have very little chance of a guy courting them.  I have some friends that I've made over there that are pretty, and haven't been asked out on a date since high school or college.  It's hard to imagine so many 20 something girls that have had zero attention from guys.
Of course the majority of girls want a baby, and they believe that they need to have a baby before 30 or it's over.  Some pretty girls also leave the Philippines to work abroad, and come back 30 years old and realize they've sort of sacrificed they're own chance of having a family  to help their siblings get through school.  Often the siblings have enjoyed the benefits, and even become married themselves.  But the girl that has worked abroad gets sort of put out to pasture in many ways.  Gratitude from the siblings is often soon forgotten.
I have 28 year old chat friend that I've chatted with for 4 years.  Didn't meet her when I was over there before because of an old boyfriend still on the scene off and on.  She recently saw her 22 year old pretty sister get married to a Filipino guy her own age, and of course she was jealous.  I'm thinking to myself we'll see what happens when her sister's new husband starts cheating on her after they have a kid.  The baby is already on the way. 

So some time has passed since my friend's ex boyfriend hit the road (they all cheat over there), and she now wants to meet me.  Hey I'm 55 and quite sure that she would prefer to have someone 28 her own age, but the options are now zero.  So I think alot of time our value dating in these countries is that the girls have run out of other options.  They would prefer to stay in their own country and meet an educated guy their own age, but they know that is not going to happen.   So you sort of have to come to terms with you not being their 1st choice if you want something long term.  I do believe good relationships develop and there are happy long lasting marriages, but the catilyst for this happening relates to supply and demand in their own country. 

Because of my own divorce after 12 years with a Colombiana, I've been gun shy to jump into anything serious again.  Sometimes it just changes you.  But giving up is also not an option.  Sometimes I think I would like to just spend 5 or 6 months over there per year and leave her there.  Not get married, and just have long term girlfriends.  Not drag them over here and spin the roulette wheel.

 I think I'm going over there in January and meet some friends and look around.  No pressure on anything.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Calipro on November 30, 2018, 10:13:43 AM


So some time has passed since my friend's ex boyfriend hit the road (they all cheat over there), and she now wants to meet me.  Hey I'm 55 and quite sure that she would prefer to have someone 28 her own age, but the options are now zero.  So I think alot of time our value dating in these countries is that the girls have run out of other options.  They would prefer to stay in their own country and meet an educated guy their own age, but they know that is not going to happen.   So you sort of have to come to terms with you not being their 1st choice if you want something long term.  I do believe good relationships develop and there are happy long lasting marriages, but the catilyst for this happening relates to supply and demand in their own country. 




Do you really think that they make a conscious decision to marry an older guy?


In Colombia I have found that chicks want what they need as opposed to American chicks that need what they want.


My ex Colombian wife told me once that Colombians love their families more than Americans love their families. Because she felt that Colombian families are a lot closer on average and got involved in each others lives more than Americans do on average.


I asked her if she thought that the fact that Colombian families need each other more and depend on each other more had anything to do with the fact that Colombian families were closer on average.


She said "No, Colombian families really do care for each other more than American families do.".


So my question is: Do you really think filipinas THINK they love their older husbands less or do they think they love their husbands just as much as a filipina married to a younger guy.


If you are really concerned about being number one.....you should live in a country where men are on top and have a child with the woman you want to be number one with. Then there is very little chance of falling from that lofty position. jajaja
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: utopiacowboy on November 30, 2018, 11:11:03 AM
My wife used to give me this crap about Colombian families being closer than American families but I have not heard this line from her in years. I see my kids and grandchildren constantly and frequently she takes a pass when I go to their houses to visit. She sees her own children infrequently even though I always go with her when she suggests a visit. I may be an extreme case but I think many American families are very close.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: benjio on November 30, 2018, 12:13:14 PM
My wife used to give me this crap about Colombian families being closer than American families but I have not heard this line from her in years. I see my kids and grandchildren constantly and frequently she takes a pass when I go to their houses to visit. She sees her own children infrequently even though I always go with her when she suggests a visit. I may be an extreme case but I think many American families are very close.

I’ve heard the same thing and from my experience I’ve seen as many negative aspects as positive when it comes to that “family closeness.”  Nothing like a jealous Colombian Family in your girlfriend’s ear telling her what a relationship with a gringo should be like. How we should be buying her expensive gifts, going on trips and starting a business for the family. All this ultimately ends up in the relationship ending because you start to realize how much Colombian Women obsess about what other people think of them. Not to mention how many Colombian girls I’ve met that were raped by uncles, cousins and even brothers in their early teens or younger because of that precious “closeness.” And the stealing from one another. God forbid cousin Fredrico leaves his iPod out in the open, unattended during a family gathering. He won’t be seeing that again unless he visits the pawn shop around the corner (TRUE STORY!!!!) The incest (primarily along the coast), domestic violence, rampant alcoholism...all commonplace because of how close families are there.

I love Colombia, the people and the culture but some of the things they are boastful about are laughable when you’ve spent enough time there.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on November 30, 2018, 03:24:12 PM
My number one choice would be a Miss Universe multi-millionaire trust find woman who.was like a porn Star in bed, cooked like a gourmet chef, loved the same things I do and would be true and loyal to.me for the rest of my life.

But I cant have that so I will have to be happy with whatever I get. :)
 
Its called "supply and demand"

I am sure your average 200 lb 50 yo over the wall gringa land whale would include  being married to Brad Pitt as high on her list.

And the Saudíes would love $200 a barrel oil.


And what was it Steve Martin said he wanted for Christmas?

https://youtu.be/yXBfs2iLHRE
 
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on November 30, 2018, 03:37:38 PM
I’ve heard the same thing and from my experience I’ve seen as many negative aspects as positive when it comes to that “family closeness.”  Nothing like a jealous Colombian Family in your girlfriend’s ear telling her what a relationship with a gringo should be like. How we should be buying her expensive gifts, going on trips and starting a business for the family. All this ultimately ends up in the relationship ending because you start to realize how much Colombian Women obsess about what other people think of them. Not to mention how many Colombian girls I’ve met that were raped by uncles, cousins and even brothers in their early teens or younger because of that precious “closeness.” And the stealing from one another. God forbid cousin Fredrico leaves his iPod out in the open, unattended during a family gathering. He won’t be seeing that again unless he visits the pawn shop around the corner (TRUE STORY!!!!) The incest (primarily along the coast), domestic violence, rampant alcoholism...all commonplace because of how close families are there.

I love Colombia, the people and the culture but some of the things they are boastful about are laughable when you’ve spent enough time there.

As my nephew would say when I told him about a crazy Colombian  New years Eve Party

"Sounds like something you would see on a First Nations reserve"

Sorry not my intent to sound racist..but the social/cultural similarities have always been striking to me.

Except Colombian women are usually way more beautiful than the women on the reserves (at least in Canada)
 
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: robert angel on November 30, 2018, 07:21:06 PM
Family life, so called "old fashioned values" we used to talk about having, have been on the decline pretty much world wide, for a while now.

And in a number of 1st world nations that are arguably more 'traditional'-- the birth rate is down to about zero.

My wife spent a couple days in Japan this past summer and was amazed at all the stores and service sector jobs there being done by young people from Nepal.

Other 1st world nations bring people in from the Philippines, and war torn, impoverished middle eastern countries, then piss and moan, eventually taking on racist overtones.

Here in the USA, an incredible amount of young people have the crazy, grandiose notion of entitlement.

The poor suckers haven't a clue that with company pensions basically history,  with so called 'Social Security' looking iffy down the line, that even if they have and DO contribute the typical amount to a 401k or 403 IRA,  they're gonna be way short on living funds thirty years from now.

But the top one percent of wealth holders will sure as hell, have a bigger slice of the pie.

In little more than two years, the "tax reform" cuts to middle class families will be eliminated, as they were only set up for five years. The corporations and wealthiest Americans? Theirs have no expiration date.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Wildstubby on November 30, 2018, 08:56:36 PM
Robert angel said:
Quote
Family life, so called "old fashioned values" we used to talk about having, have been on the decline pretty much world wide, for a while now.

And in a number of 1st world nations that are arguably more 'traditional'-- the birth rate is down to about zero.

My wife spent a couple days in Japan this past summer and was amazed at all the stores and service sector jobs there being done by young people from Nepal.

Other 1st world nations bring people in from the Philippines, and war torn, impoverished middle eastern countries, then piss and moan, eventually taking on racist overtones.

Here in the USA, an incredible amount of young people have the crazy, grandiose notion of entitlement.

The poor suckers haven't a clue that with company pensions basically history,  with so called 'Social Security' looking iffy down the line, that even if they have and DO contribute the typical amount to a 401k or 403 IRA,  they're gonna be way short on living funds thirty years from now.

But the top one percent of wealth holders will sure as hell, have a bigger slice of the pie.

In little more than two years, the "tax reform" cuts to middle class families will be eliminated, as they were only set up for five years. The corporations and wealthiest Americans? Theirs have no expiration date.

That's why I went the route that I did. Personally, I think I have a winner! But it is the family unit that I felt was missing from my life. Sitting down at suppertime, with all personal electronics turned off and not causing a distraction. Being raised in (US) poverty and learning the value of a dollar, I passed that on to my son. I also taught him about putting in the max toward his 401K. When his aunt passed away, he was given a $20K inheritance. He wanted to buy a new car but he had about $15K in student loans at 8.9% for the next 10 years. I showed him the financial differences between the 2 and he paid of his Stafford loan instead. Then, he was able to get a car at 3.0% for 4 years, (which he paid off). So I feel good that I instilled good financial values in him but I worry about the rest of his generation grasping the idea. They will be the ones 'taking care of us!'
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: robert angel on December 01, 2018, 03:02:55 PM
Robert angel said:
That's why I went the route that I did. Personally, I think I have a winner! But it is the family unit that I felt was missing from my life. Sitting down at suppertime, with all personal electronics turned off and not causing a distraction. Being raised in (US) poverty and learning the value of a dollar, I passed that on to my son. I also taught him about putting in the max toward his 401K. When his aunt passed away, he was given a $20K inheritance. He wanted to buy a new car but he had about $15K in student loans at 8.9% for the next 10 years. I showed him the financial differences between the 2 and he paid of his Stafford loan instead. Then, he was able to get a car at 3.0% for 4 years, (which he paid off). So I feel good that I instilled good financial values in him but I worry about the rest of his generation grasping the idea. They will be the ones 'taking care of us!'

Sounds good, did you by chance mean to write "Stanford"? There are quite a few fine schools out there, but Stanford's in a select few, for sure...
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: utopiacowboy on December 01, 2018, 03:48:37 PM
Except Colombian women are usually way more beautiful than the women on the reserves (at least in Canada)


I was in Flagstaff, Arizona last year to watch my grandson play football and about half the high school was Navajo and Hopi. One thing I noticed about the Native girls - they were either unattractive or gorgeous - there were very few in between. At least to my taste.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: robert angel on December 01, 2018, 06:25:52 PM

I was in Flagstaff, Arizona last year to watch my grandson play football and about half the high school was Navajo and Hopi. One thing I noticed about the Native girls - they were either unattractive or gorgeous - there were very few in between. At least to my taste.

A lot of those Native Americans, especially on the reservations, eat an awful amount of junk food and become fat and increasingly unhealthy.
But that's also the trend in the USA's lower socio economic groups pretty much across the board.
Eating a healthy, well balanced diet, especially if you lean towards more organic foods, takes more work, time and money.
The corporatization (is that a real word?) of our food supply, is killing us.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Wildstubby on December 01, 2018, 09:06:42 PM
Robert angel said:
Quote
Sounds good, did you by chance mean to write "Stanford"? There are quite a few fine schools out there, but Stanford's in a select few, for sure.
That was a Stafford loan. If you make too much money to get a low/no interest government student loan, and you don't have the coin in the bank for a real education, you use the Stafford loan. Borrow money for 8.9% with 10 years to pay it off. The amount of interest was phenomenal! That's what sold him on paying the loans off!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: buenopues4 on December 02, 2018, 07:33:59 AM
A lot of those Native Americans, especially on the reservations, eat an awful amount of junk food and become fat and increasingly unhealthy.
But that's also the trend in the USA's lower socio economic groups pretty much across the board.
Eating a healthy, well balanced diet, especially if you lean towards more organic foods, takes more work, time and money.
The corporatization (is that a real word?) of our food supply, is killing us.


That is the case with the Tohono O'odham or Papago Indians of southwestern Arizona. For thousands of years they lived on desert plants and animals. Any meat they consumed such as peccary was extremely lean. Then almost five hundred years ago the Spanish arrived bringing cattle. Today almost all of them are fat and there's a huge incidence of diabetes. 500 years is a blink of an eye in evolutionary terms and their bodies have not had time to adapt to the high fat diet initiated with the arrival of the conquistadors. Some have tried to revert to a diet supplied by the Sonoran Desert but the problem is it doesn't taste very good.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: robert angel on December 02, 2018, 09:19:02 AM

That is the case with the Tohono O'odham or Papago Indians of southwestern Arizona. For thousands of years they lived on desert plants and animals. Any meat they consumed such as peccary was extremely lean. Then almost five hundred years ago the Spanish arrived bringing cattle. Today almost all of them are fat and there's a huge incidence of diabetes. 500 years is a blink of an eye in evolutionary terms and their bodies have not had time to adapt to the high fat diet initiated with the arrival of the conquistadors. Some have tried to revert to a diet supplied by the Sonoran Desert but the problem is it doesn't taste very good.

It's cheaper to use high fructose corn syrup instead of sugar, and they put it in just about everything, even some baby formula brands. But it's awful for the body. It gets people fat and on their way to diabetes. Stresses the liver and kidneys.

A lot of foods are loaded with saturated fats, which clogs the arteries, which makes it harder for our hearts to push our overweight bodies.

They try and artificially 'enrich' many foods, which tends to make them run through our systems faster than more natural foods. You get (if you can afford it) meat or poultry in a 3rd world country and cook it in a pot, you don't end up with all the water left over like you do in the states.

More meat factories are adding "liquid adhanced solutions" to packaged meat, which in addition to adding profitable weight, serves as sort of an 'embalming fluid' which stops the meat from turning green, keeping it on the shelf longer.

Milk is so full of hormones, that third grade girls are needing to wear bras and by the 4th grade, a lot of boys develop mustaches. Then, the big factories that produce our food supplies use more antibiotics than the human population consumes.

A real scary story is to look at pig giant Smithfield meats and their Chinese ownership. They've messed up a big area of the southern USA, mostly populated by poor people, who need the crappy jobs, jobs that don't pay enough for them to move away from the toxic zone. Like nuclear power plants, paper mills and mega meat processing factories,  they're usually alongside water they need for 'processing' which becomes unusable for recreation. They also spray the water into the air and on crops, as a sick form of 'fertilizer'.

Meanwhile, look at the ingredient label on what you buy at the grocery some time. So many strange sounding ingredients.  Our general rule is: "If you can't pronounce the ingredients,  don't buy it"

Our "Protectors"--- the FDA-- Federal 'Food and Drug Administration" really doesn't do much to safeguard our health.

Like environmental pollution,  it all boils down to greed for profit.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Wildstubby on December 02, 2018, 11:57:57 AM
buenospues4 said:
Quote
That is the case with the Tohono O'odham or Papago Indians of southwestern Arizona. For thousands of years they lived on desert plants and animals. Any meat they consumed such as peccary was extremely lean. Then almost five hundred years ago the Spanish arrived bringing cattle. Today almost all of them are fat and there's a huge incidence of diabetes. 500 years is a blink of an eye in evolutionary terms and their bodies have not had time to adapt to the high fat diet initiated with the arrival of the conquistadors. Some have tried to revert to a diet supplied by the Sonoran Desert but the problem is it doesn't taste very good.
Its interesting that you note that. My novia's 7 year old daughter, who eats like a bird and is relatively small, is concerned about becoming obese when she comes to live here because of all the extra 'nutrients' we place in our food.
Its ok to be conscience of what goes into our food but don't throw the baby out with the bathwater. Many things use Xanthan gum as a thickener. At first you might think it is prudent to shun it from your diet because it is artificial. However, having worked in the facility that used to produce almost half of the country's intake of Xanthan gum, I can say that it is 100% natural. It is derived from organisms that live on seaweed! Also, it is used a lubricant in the oil drilling industry because it is slick and biodegradable!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: robert angel on December 02, 2018, 04:02:58 PM
buenospues4 said:Its interesting that you note that. My novia's 7 year old daughter, who eats like a bird and is relatively small, is concerned about becoming obese when she comes to live here because of all the extra 'nutrients' we place in our food.
Its ok to be conscience of what goes into our food but don't throw the baby out with the bathwater. Many things use Xanthan gum as a thickener. At first you might think it is prudent to shun it from your diet because it is artificial. However, having worked in the facility that used to produce almost half of the country's intake of Xanthan gum, I can say that it is 100% natural. It is derived from organisms that live on seaweed! Also, it is used a lubricant in the oil drilling industry because it is slick and biodegradable!

It is an interesting product and in a way, not that different from cheese, albeit a more recent invention. And like cheese, if people knew exactly how it 'came about' they might unfairly go "eeewwwie"

Despite the somewhat novel name, most people can pronounce it!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Wildstubby on December 02, 2018, 08:32:28 PM
Xanthan gum dry is as abrasive as sandpaper, wet it's like snot on a doorknob!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: ag1987 on December 07, 2018, 09:35:44 AM
Happy Friday, all!

A bit of an update for you, albeit not a positive one:

As many know, Jamie sends your profile to the women you express interest in, once they return their interest, he sends the positive replies to you. Any that are out of the Barranquilla area, he recommends communicating with to see if there is enough of a reason to bring them to Barranquilla during the visit. Great.

I had 4 solid profiles of women whom were outside of Barranquilla. I sent notes to each and had a response from one within a couple hours. I had invited in the e-mail to move the conversation to WhatsApp and/or FaceBook if that was better. This one who responded is the "triple-threat" as I have seen described here; speaks English, has a tourist visa, and is attractive. 26 years old, a nursing student, lives at home with parents and younger sister (unfortunately age 15, ;) ). Conversation moved to WhatsApp (last Monday), video chat with her till wee hours of the morning. She's been to the US before and worked as a Au Pair in suburbs of D.C. Daily conversations, video chatting, phone calls, etc. Decide, well [snip], she's great so far, why not fly down and meet her and her family? She loves the idea and we agree to this weekend. I book a flight + hotel in Laureles (near her home) and she's going to pick me up with the parents.

Around 17:30 yesterday, her WhatsApp profile has turned "grey" and her FaceBook is now deactivated. Phone calls don't go through. [snip]. Interestingly enough, her profile was on Jamie's site yesterday afternoon, but is now gone. Called Jamie (didn't mention that I would be flying to Medellin this weekend) for his take, he thought perhaps her phone was taken by someone and messed with. I sent her an e-mail to the original address we connected through but never heard back...

"Ghosted" is the new term people use nowadays I have found out. Sent Jamie an e-mail asking if she mentioned anything in her request to have her profile removed - sent him some other profiles as well for my January trip. Hope to hear back over the weekend. I'm not interested in the whole get to know ahead of time BS now after this. Will call American and see if I can re-coup or get some sort of credit for the airfare. Sucks to have this happen. Never sent her money or anything of value (she never asked, either) so she hasn't "gained" anything so to speak. My gut feeling is that her parents and family were unaware of her being on Jamie's site/interest in foreign men and, once they caught wind of this somehow, intervened and went nuts on her. The last thing I said was that I was beginning to pack my bags and was excited.

Live and learn. I still plan to go and hope that getting in front of these women will yield a better outcome. This was insane, weird, and a bunch of other adjectives at the same time.

Hope you all have a great weekend!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: mambocowboy on December 07, 2018, 10:05:53 AM
Happy Friday, all!

A bit of an update for you, albeit not a positive one:

As many know, Jamie sends your profile to the women you express interest in, once they return their interest, he sends the positive replies to you. Any that are out of the Barranquilla area, he recommends communicating with to see if there is enough of a reason to bring them to Barranquilla during the visit. Great.

I had 4 solid profiles of women whom were outside of Barranquilla. I sent notes to each and had a response from one within a couple hours. I had invited in the e-mail to move the conversation to WhatsApp and/or FaceBook if that was better. This one who responded is the "triple-threat" as I have seen described here; speaks English, has a tourist visa, and is attractive. 26 years old, a nursing student, lives at home with parents and younger sister (unfortunately age 15, ;) ). Conversation moved to WhatsApp (last Monday), video chat with her till wee hours of the morning. She's been to the US before and worked as a Au Pair in suburbs of D.C. Daily conversations, video chatting, phone calls, etc. Decide, well [snip], she's great so far, why not fly down and meet her and her family? She loves the idea and we agree to this weekend. I book a flight + hotel in Laureles (near her home) and she's going to pick me up with the parents.

Around 17:30 yesterday, her WhatsApp profile has turned "grey" and her FaceBook is now deactivated. Phone calls don't go through. [snip]. Interestingly enough, her profile was on Jamie's site yesterday afternoon, but is now gone. Called Jamie (didn't mention that I would be flying to Medellin this weekend) for his take, he thought perhaps her phone was taken by someone and messed with. I sent her an e-mail to the original address we connected through but never heard back...

"Ghosted" is the new term people use nowadays I have found out. Sent Jamie an e-mail asking if she mentioned anything in her request to have her profile removed - sent him some other profiles as well for my January trip. Hope to hear back over the weekend. I'm not interested in the whole get to know ahead of time BS now after this. Will call American and see if I can re-coup or get some sort of credit for the airfare. Sucks to have this happen. Never sent her money or anything of value (she never asked, either) so she hasn't "gained" anything so to speak. My gut feeling is that her parents and family were unaware of her being on Jamie's site/interest in foreign men and, once they caught wind of this somehow, intervened and went nuts on her. The last thing I said was that I was beginning to pack my bags and was excited.

Live and learn. I still plan to go and hope that getting in front of these women will yield a better outcome. This was insane, weird, and a bunch of other adjectives at the same time.

Hope you all have a great weekend!
Live and learn indeed! Thanks for sharing.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: benjio on December 07, 2018, 01:52:25 PM
Happy Friday, all!

A bit of an update for you, albeit not a positive one:

As many know, Jamie sends your profile to the women you express interest in, once they return their interest, he sends the positive replies to you. Any that are out of the Barranquilla area, he recommends communicating with to see if there is enough of a reason to bring them to Barranquilla during the visit. Great.

I had 4 solid profiles of women whom were outside of Barranquilla. I sent notes to each and had a response from one within a couple hours. I had invited in the e-mail to move the conversation to WhatsApp and/or FaceBook if that was better. This one who responded is the "triple-threat" as I have seen described here; speaks English, has a tourist visa, and is attractive. 26 years old, a nursing student, lives at home with parents and younger sister (unfortunately age 15, ;) ). Conversation moved to WhatsApp (last Monday), video chat with her till wee hours of the morning. She's been to the US before and worked as a Au Pair in suburbs of D.C. Daily conversations, video chatting, phone calls, etc. Decide, well [snip], she's great so far, why not fly down and meet her and her family? She loves the idea and we agree to this weekend. I book a flight + hotel in Laureles (near her home) and she's going to pick me up with the parents.

Around 17:30 yesterday, her WhatsApp profile has turned "grey" and her FaceBook is now deactivated. Phone calls don't go through. [snip]. Interestingly enough, her profile was on Jamie's site yesterday afternoon, but is now gone. Called Jamie (didn't mention that I would be flying to Medellin this weekend) for his take, he thought perhaps her phone was taken by someone and messed with. I sent her an e-mail to the original address we connected through but never heard back...

"Ghosted" is the new term people use nowadays I have found out. Sent Jamie an e-mail asking if she mentioned anything in her request to have her profile removed - sent him some other profiles as well for my January trip. Hope to hear back over the weekend. I'm not interested in the whole get to know ahead of time BS now after this. Will call American and see if I can re-coup or get some sort of credit for the airfare. Sucks to have this happen. Never sent her money or anything of value (she never asked, either) so she hasn't "gained" anything so to speak. My gut feeling is that her parents and family were unaware of her being on Jamie's site/interest in foreign men and, once they caught wind of this somehow, intervened and went nuts on her. The last thing I said was that I was beginning to pack my bags and was excited.

Live and learn. I still plan to go and hope that getting in front of these women will yield a better outcome. This was insane, weird, and a bunch of other adjectives at the same time.

Hope you all have a great weekend!

Probably nothing to do with her parents. I’ve heard of that happening but only in really affluent circles. Colombian parents may be a bit apprehensive about foreign men but they know the score as well as we do. Their daughters have a much better chance at a happy marriage and a better quality of life by getting with a gringo and leaving Colombia. There may be some level of disrepute that comes along with Paisas dating gringos because of the assumptions people make but still.

Sounds to me like an old (or current) boyfriend may have caught wind of her meeting someone else and intervened. Nothing wrong with her Whatsapp or her Facebook profile....you’re just blocked. And I think Jamie is trying to tell you in a very nice way that her boyfriend is the one that got ahold of her cell and realized you two were communicating. Probably got super pissed and then she placed the blame on him because he cheats, drinks too much, etc. Then he probably went into pleading mode promising to change, then they had awesome makeup sex and that’s all she wrote. I’m just making assumptions here but this is crap I’ve seen happen a thousand times down there. You can offer those girls the world but they can’t let go of that first love, barrio boy.

Thing about Colombian guys is they don’t ever give a $hit about their women more than when there’s a risk they may lose them to another man. A Colombiano can have a wife, a family on the side, a girlfriend and a cousin of that girlfriend that he’s secretly f&cking and if you mess with any of them he’ll be threatening your life. This is especially true with the poorer guys because I think they feel like the only thing they have of real value is their “stable” of women. What trips me out is a lot of these guys can’t contribute a single peso to help raise their children, but if a gringo is interested in giving their ex and their child a better life they’d rather them continue to struggle. I’ve even heard of Colombianos charging gringos so their children could leave the country with their soon to be stepfathers.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: benjio on December 07, 2018, 02:40:22 PM
Ag,

If you think these women just sit around, honorably studying and working, maintaining a pure and virtuous life of complete abstinence, waiting on a gringo knight in shining armor to come and save them from the evil clutches of the machisimo death trap that is Colombia, don’t!!! If they are attractive there is almost ALWAYS a guy they are at the very least still sleeping with. And usually there’s some first love that broke their virginities that can come back and get it any time he wants.

It’s not that Colombianas are inherently unfaithful. It’s the distance!!! They’re human beings. They get lonely...and even worse, they get horny!!! The trick is finding a woman with enough sense to realize she deserves and can have so much more. One that is willing to work at the relationship with you. Those are your keepers. And there are plenty of them down there. Good luck!!!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: ag1987 on December 07, 2018, 02:47:28 PM
b,


Who knows what the reason behind it is - we video chatted in the mornings, afternoons, evenings...all over the map. If she had/has a ex in the picture, I couldn't have done anything different to figure that out. Glad to hear what you write in the second paragraph. Definitely looking for one of those!!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Wildstubby on December 07, 2018, 03:00:29 PM
Don't feel bad and chalk it up to a 'lesson learned'. I had the same kind of thing happen to me rather 2 times in 2 different ways. First time met a younger girl in her early 30's which was ok with me. Broke the 'golden rule' about making a trip to see one woman. Anyway, what I thought was a relationship on all cylinders I felt within the first 3 minutes it wasn't going to work. All she kept doing was talking to her 'abuela' on the phone. Fortunately for me I knew another woman in the city that saved the visit for me. 2nd time was I had talked with a woman from Bq. I mean we had been talking for 3 years (first one from colombiacupid), before I decided to make a trip there. However, when I go there, she engages the 'cloaking device'. Finally I got pissed and asked her what happened. She gave me the proverbial  :'( icon. I told her 'ciao!' and deleted her. I had others to meet so it was no great loss. So it happens. These women are fickle as the day is long. You learned, now put it behind you but always keep a weary eye about!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: buenopues4 on December 07, 2018, 03:15:33 PM
Happy Friday, all!

A bit of an update for you, albeit not a positive one:

As many know, Jamie sends your profile to the women you express interest in, once they return their interest, he sends the positive replies to you. Any that are out of the Barranquilla area, he recommends communicating with to see if there is enough of a reason to bring them to Barranquilla during the visit. Great.

I had 4 solid profiles of women whom were outside of Barranquilla. I sent notes to each and had a response from one within a couple hours. I had invited in the e-mail to move the conversation to WhatsApp and/or FaceBook if that was better. This one who responded is the "triple-threat" as I have seen described here; speaks English, has a tourist visa, and is attractive. 26 years old, a nursing student, lives at home with parents and younger sister (unfortunately age 15, ;) ). Conversation moved to WhatsApp (last Monday), video chat with her till wee hours of the morning. She's been to the US before and worked as a Au Pair in suburbs of D.C. Daily conversations, video chatting, phone calls, etc. Decide, well [snip], she's great so far, why not fly down and meet her and her family? She loves the idea and we agree to this weekend. I book a flight + hotel in Laureles (near her home) and she's going to pick me up with the parents.

Around 17:30 yesterday, her WhatsApp profile has turned "grey" and her FaceBook is now deactivated. Phone calls don't go through. [snip]. Interestingly enough, her profile was on Jamie's site yesterday afternoon, but is now gone. Called Jamie (didn't mention that I would be flying to Medellin this weekend) for his take, he thought perhaps her phone was taken by someone and messed with. I sent her an e-mail to the original address we connected through but never heard back...

"Ghosted" is the new term people use nowadays I have found out. Sent Jamie an e-mail asking if she mentioned anything in her request to have her profile removed - sent him some other profiles as well for my January trip. Hope to hear back over the weekend. I'm not interested in the whole get to know ahead of time BS now after this. Will call American and see if I can re-coup or get some sort of credit for the airfare. Sucks to have this happen. Never sent her money or anything of value (she never asked, either) so she hasn't "gained" anything so to speak. My gut feeling is that her parents and family were unaware of her being on Jamie's site/interest in foreign men and, once they caught wind of this somehow, intervened and went nuts on her. The last thing I said was that I was beginning to pack my bags and was excited.

Live and learn. I still plan to go and hope that getting in front of these women will yield a better outcome. This was insane, weird, and a bunch of other adjectives at the same time.

Hope you all have a great weekend!


Not to be unkind but it sounds like she just changed her mind and decided not to make the commitments involved in meeting you. It is comforting to rationalize but at 26 I doubt her family had anything to do with her backing out. I think you've learned a good lesson early: the "getting to know you"  shyt is an invention of the agencies to generate more income. Colombian girls are no different than you or me, it's quimica at first viewing or it's "move on". So skip this nonsense which really has zero credibility in Colombia and make your play when you meet them in person in person. If you want to communicate with a colombiana before arrival narrow it to two weeks prior or less.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: ag1987 on December 07, 2018, 08:01:42 PM
Yep, no comms from me until arrival. I jumped the gun being excited about the prospect of someone who seemed genuine - made plans to meet in person as fast as reasonably could given hoops I have to jump through for foreign travel...lesson learned.


Face-to-face (physically in person, not a video chat) is the only way now.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: mambocowboy on December 07, 2018, 08:31:22 PM
Yep, no comms from me until arrival. I jumped the gun being excited about the prospect of someone who seemed genuine - made plans to meet in person as fast as reasonably could given hoops I have to jump through for foreign travel...lesson learned.


Face-to-face (physically in person, not a video chat) is the only way now.
These lessons are most valuable to learn as early as possible.  And the hard advice you're getting is hard earned and spot on...

.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: benjio on December 08, 2018, 07:36:56 AM
Yep, no comms from me until arrival. I jumped the gun being excited about the prospect of someone who seemed genuine - made plans to meet in person as fast as reasonably could given hoops I have to jump through for foreign travel...lesson learned.


Face-to-face (physically in person, not a video chat) is the only way now.

Don’t beat yourself up too much. No one ever listens to advice here when they first get started. I knew a girl in Barranquilla personally and Jamie and I warned a guy about her...still didn’t listen!! We all have to learn on our own. I can’t tell you how many times I ignored Jamie thinking to myself, “what does he know about my relationship?” or “he doesn’t even know this girl personally!!” And he was spot on. EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.

Women are complex creatures no matter where they are from. But there are gender specific cultural influences that very few can escape from. This is why I said get to know the culture. Jamie has been there for decades though. If Gringos dating Costeña Women were a sport you could wager on he’d be a billionaire. The best advice I can give you is to take his and his staff’s advice at all times...no matter what your gut or anything below that is telling you.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: ag1987 on December 08, 2018, 08:14:02 AM
Thanks benjio, appreciate it. Just over a month away from my trip (starts 17JAN). Holidays will make that time go by quickly.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on December 08, 2018, 09:31:56 AM
Majority of these women are so flaky...to be brunt..espescially  the ones in the agencies and on the internet sites

The best philosphy with Colombian women is "guilty until proven innocent" ..dont take anyone seriously until they have proven their sincerity beyond a shadow of a doubt..no.matter  how much initial "chemistry" you seem to have, how much sex and affection they give you initially.

The majority are so wish washy and some are downright evil narcisists. A lot of them have been highly "damaged " by years of abuse by family members, boyfriend and by themselves by their own bad decisions.

As far as ex or present boyfriends, your lucky he didnt wait until you were in Colombia , and you were a lot more emotionally attached to her, and he steals her phone, sends you threatening messages along with nude photos of her (like happened to me). Or worse yet, arrive at your meeting place with her on a moto with a gun (like happened to a friend)

And yes the barrio Boy treats her like crap.. but gets insanely jealous when she gets a better deal from a relatively well off gringo.

But she sticks with him..and then when he impregnates her and abandons her, or she gets tired of his cheating and physical and  emotional abuse , and she "hits the Wall" at 30 or 35 ..she says " I dont Like Colombian men" and she goes back on the internet search for a Gringo or foreigner Simp to take care  of her and her illegitamite child or children..when the actual.meaning of the words " I dont like Colombian men is" no self respecting quality Colombian Man is gonna  be interested (other than as a piece of ass) in a 35 yo  plus single mom( espescially..but  bit Aldo appplies to a childless women of the same age and with similar  issues , damage and  baggage  as well)  with all types of baggage who has "hit the wall"  as far as atractiveness ..they leave that to the bobo gringo simps..
 

When you get a flaky chica like this it is time to drop them right away, block them, tierra quemada .."ghosting" as you say ....flakiness is a sign of bigger issues..a signs that she is"damaged goods"
In your case..and everyone elses..its a"numbers" game...get the numbers up..you shoukd be meeting with at least 12 or 14 when you are there which mean a minum of 30 contacts before you go.

Also listen to what the girl says..and read between the lines..since you dont have any Colombian friends yet.. best to bounce things off of Jaimie..
Have patience and be tenacious. You think its difficult in your 30s ..imagine being in your 50s or 60s..
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: benjio on December 08, 2018, 10:39:49 AM


As far as ex or present boyfriends, your lucky he didnt wait until you were in Colombia , and you were a lot more emotionally attached to her, and he steals her phone, sends you threatening messages along with nude photos of her....



Been there!!!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: mambocowboy on December 08, 2018, 11:29:11 AM
Majority of these women are so flaky...to be brunt..espescially  the ones in the agencies and on the internet sites

The best philosphy with Colombian women is "guilty until proven innocent" ..dont take anyone seriously until they have proven their sincerity beyond a shadow of a doubt..no.matter  how much initial "chemistry" you seem to have, how much sex and affection they give you initially.

The majority are so wish washy and some are downright evil narcisists. A lot of them have been highly "damaged " by years of abuse by family members, boyfriend and by themselves by their own bad decisions.

As far as ex or present boyfriends, your lucky he didnt wait until you were in Colombia , and you were a lot more emotionally attached to her, and he steals her phone, sends you threatening messages along with nude photos of her (like happened to me). Or worse yet, arrive at your meeting place with her on a moto with a gun (like happened to a friend)

And yes the barrio Boy treats her like crap.. but gets insanely jealous when she gets a better deal from a relatively well off gringo.

But she sticks with him..and then when he impregnates her and abandons her, or she gets tired of his cheating and physical and  emotional abuse , and she "hits the Wall" at 30 or 35 ..she says " I dont Like Colombian men" and she goes back on the internet search for a Gringo or foreigner Simp to take care  of her and her illegitamite child or children..when the actual.meaning of the words " I dont like Colombian men is" no self respecting quality Colombian Man is gonna  be interested (other than as a piece of ass) in a 35 yo  plus single mom( espescially..but  bit Aldo appplies to a childless women of the same age and with similar  issues , damage and  baggage  as well)  with all types of baggage who has "hit the wall"  as far as atractiveness ..they leave that to the bobo gringo simps..
 

When you get a flaky chica like this it is time to drop them right away, block them, tierra quemada .."ghosting" as you say ....flakiness is a sign of bigger issues..a signs that she is"damaged goods"
In your case..and everyone elses..its a"numbers" game...get the numbers up..you shoukd be meeting with at least 12 or 14 when you are there which mean a minum of 30 contacts before you go.

Also listen to what the girl says..and read between the lines..since you dont have any Colombian friends yet.. best to bounce things off of Jaimie..
Have patience and be tenacious. You think its difficult in your 30s ..imagine being in your 50s or 60s..
Epic post! Hard earned advice. That's why I think gringos should sow their oats there for awhile before thinking about a serious relationship.  The more options you have, the more power you have....
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: ag1987 on December 08, 2018, 12:15:12 PM
Majority of these women are so flaky...to be brunt..espescially  the ones in the agencies and on the internet sites

The best philosphy with Colombian women is "guilty until proven innocent" ..dont take anyone seriously until they have proven their sincerity beyond a shadow of a doubt..no.matter  how much initial "chemistry" you seem to have, how much sex and affection they give you initially.

The majority are so wish washy and some are downright evil narcisists. A lot of them have been highly "damaged " by years of abuse by family members, boyfriend and by themselves by their own bad decisions.

As far as ex or present boyfriends, your lucky he didnt wait until you were in Colombia , and you were a lot more emotionally attached to her, and he steals her phone, sends you threatening messages along with nude photos of her (like happened to me). Or worse yet, arrive at your meeting place with her on a moto with a gun (like happened to a friend)

And yes the barrio Boy treats her like crap.. but gets insanely jealous when she gets a better deal from a relatively well off gringo.

But she sticks with him..and then when he impregnates her and abandons her, or she gets tired of his cheating and physical and  emotional abuse , and she "hits the Wall" at 30 or 35 ..she says " I dont Like Colombian men" and she goes back on the internet search for a Gringo or foreigner Simp to take care  of her and her illegitamite child or children..when the actual.meaning of the words " I dont like Colombian men is" no self respecting quality Colombian Man is gonna  be interested (other than as a piece of ass) in a 35 yo  plus single mom( espescially..but  bit Aldo appplies to a childless women of the same age and with similar  issues , damage and  baggage  as well)  with all types of baggage who has "hit the wall"  as far as atractiveness ..they leave that to the bobo gringo simps..
 

When you get a flaky chica like this it is time to drop them right away, block them, tierra quemada .."ghosting" as you say ....flakiness is a sign of bigger issues..a signs that she is"damaged goods"
In your case..and everyone elses..its a"numbers" game...get the numbers up..you shoukd be meeting with at least 12 or 14 when you are there which mean a minum of 30 contacts before you go.

Also listen to what the girl says..and read between the lines..since you dont have any Colombian friends yet.. best to bounce things off of Jaimie..
Have patience and be tenacious. You think its difficult in your 30s ..imagine being in your 50s or 60s..


Awesome post, thank you. Yes, glass is half full and DEFINITELY am thankful that for whatever reason this happened, it happened while my two feet were still on U.S. soil. Goddamn if I were to arrive and she/family is a NO-SHOW. I didn't sense any flaky-ness from her so it came as a shock to get the ghosting in this manner. Only so much you can do from afar, so being boots-on-ground will be much better. I went all out with Jamie's service and asked to have the translator for each day I am there (small discount if you added it with lodging). Previous poster's experiences all endorsed it and felt like it was a great value to them during their limited time in country. I just sent Jamie more profiles for him and his staff to send out to gauge interest, I am hopeful to have 15-20 to meet when I am there.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: buenopues4 on December 08, 2018, 05:07:06 PM
The horror stories (expat's) don't just end badly for the gringo. About five years ago El Pais published a story in which a girl from Terron (invacion above Cali) had been communicating with a gringo who was sending her money. Her novio found out and tried to extort money from the gringo. That failed (probably language barrier) so the novio and a friend brought her to Rozo on the outskirts of Cali and killed her.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Wildstubby on December 08, 2018, 06:25:00 PM
buenopues4 said:
Quote
The horror stories (expat's) don't just end badly for the gringo. About five years ago El Pais published a story in which a girl from Terron (invacion above Cali) had been communicating with a gringo who was sending her money. Her novio found out and tried to extort money from the gringo. That failed (probably language barrier) so the novio and a friend brought her to Rozo on the outskirts of Cali and killed her.
One of the earlier remote relationships I struck up was with a woman from Cali. Everything was going great until I received a message saying mother needed an operation and brother who was taking care of her lost his job, yada, yada, yada. But it and the subsequent message that followed which wanted money from me, were way out of syntax of the original messages. I could tell it wasn't her that wrote it because you could see the difference in the thought pattern and word usage. Big red flag! I dropped it and buried it like a cat turd. One thing to remember is if you see that proverbial red flag, drop it and cut your losses! Its just not worth the trouble!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Calipro on December 09, 2018, 12:17:07 AM
Happy Friday, all!

A bit of an update for you, albeit not a positive one:


I had 4 solid profiles of women whom were outside of Barranquilla. I sent notes to each and had a response from one within a couple hours. I had invited in the e-mail to move the conversation to WhatsApp and/or FaceBook if that was better. This one who responded is the "triple-threat" as I have seen described here; speaks English, has a tourist visa, and is attractive. 26 years old, a nursing student, lives at home with parents and younger sister (unfortunately age 15, ;) ). Conversation moved to WhatsApp (last Monday), video chat with her till wee hours of the morning. She's been to the US before and worked as a Au Pair in suburbs of D.C. Daily conversations, video chatting, phone calls, etc. Decide, well [snip], she's great so far, why not fly down and meet her and her family? She loves the idea and we agree to this weekend. I book a flight + hotel in Laureles (near her home) and she's going to pick me up with the parents.

Around 17:30 yesterday, her WhatsApp profile has turned "grey" and her FaceBook is now deactivated. Phone calls don't go through. [snip]. Interestingly enough, her profile was on Jamie's site yesterday afternoon, but is now gone. Called Jamie (didn't mention that I would be flying to Medellin this weekend) for his take, he thought perhaps her phone was taken by someone and messed with. I sent her an e-mail to the original address we connected through but never heard back...

"Ghosted" is the new term people use nowadays I have found out. Sent Jamie an e-mail asking if she mentioned anything in her request to have her profile removed - sent him some other profiles as well for my January trip. Hope to hear back over the weekend. I'm not interested in the whole get to know ahead of time BS now after this. Will call American and see if I can re-coup or get some sort of credit for the airfare. Sucks to have this happen. Never sent her money or anything of value (she never asked, either) so she hasn't "gained" anything so to speak. My gut feeling is that her parents and family were unaware of her being on Jamie's site/interest in foreign men and, once they caught wind of this somehow, intervened and went nuts on her. The last thing I said was that I was beginning to pack my bags and was excited.

Live and learn. I still plan to go and hope that getting in front of these women will yield a better outcome. This was insane, weird, and a bunch of other adjectives at the same time.

Hope you all have a great weekend!




I don't understand....you are going to call American airlines for a credit?


So you never cancelled your flight before it took off and never got on the plane?


Let us know what what happens with that.


How do you know her facebook account is deactivated or maybe you are just blocked?


You should send the link to her facebook account to someone else to see if they can see it.


If I had a ticket to Medellin with time off....I would have gotten on that plane.
There are more hot women per square mile in Medellin than any other place on earth.


The problem with marriage agencies is that the best looking and most desirable women aren't in them. If you have the time and money ....you will almost certainly have better luck by opening yourself up to entire population of any city you visit as opposed to the small cross section of women that are willing to join a marriage agency.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: ag1987 on December 09, 2018, 07:32:30 AM



I don't understand....you are going to call American airlines for a credit?


So you never cancelled your flight before it took off and never got on the plane?


Let us know what what happens with that.


How do you know her facebook account is deactivated or maybe you are just blocked?


You should send the link to her facebook account to someone else to see if they can see it.


If I had a ticket to Medellin with time off....I would have gotten on that plane.
There are more hot women per square mile in Medellin than any other place on earth.


The problem with marriage agencies is that the best looking and most desirable women aren't in them. If you have the time and money ....you will almost certainly have better luck by opening yourself up to entire population of any city you visit as opposed to the small cross section of women that are willing to join a marriage agency.


I did not fly down, no. American credited me with a voucher I can use within the next year. Her FB account is gone, as far as I can tell. I asked a few other friends to search for her, and nothing comes up. Her parents are on FB as well, and have their friend lists available to public without being connected...sure enough she isn't listed under her parents friend lists, either. Without being a FB expert, I assume her profile has been deactivated.


Re: flying down. As a total newbie to Colombia, I wasn't going to fly down without some sort of plan. A lack of Spanish skills beyond the basics wouldn't help my cause, either. I had no intention of doing anything before next month when I'd be there for a couple weeks, having everything taken care of with Jamie and his staff. She showed up in the picture because of her not being in Barranquilla, we hit it off and as far as I could tell, she was genuine. I have no answer other than the possibilities offered in prior posts from others as to why she disappeared. Never sent her a thing, so she got nothing out of me.


I am sure a future visit on my own to Medellin or elsewhere is in the cards, time off isn't hard with enough notice. By then I'll have better Spanish skills and more experience down there. If I meet someone in the agency, great. If not, I look at it as a good stepping stone to this whole process.







Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Wildstubby on December 09, 2018, 09:37:18 AM
There will be those here that will say otherwise, but I was advised to avoid Medellin as a first visit to Colombia also. I made the mistake of going to a 'no-go' area of Bogota on my first trip. I come out unscathed, but in retrospect, it could have been a horrible experience. Go there by all means. But take time to learn some of the 'nuances' about the country and the people before you do. There are stark difference between the costeñas and piasas. But they do share some attitudes. Take in all the culture!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on December 09, 2018, 11:19:07 AM




So you never cancelled your flight before it took off and never got on the plane?


Let us know what what happens with that.


How do you know her facebook account is deactivated or maybe you are just blocked?


You should send the link to her facebook account to someone else to see if they can see it.


If I had a ticket to Medellin with time off....I would have gotten on that plane.
There are more hot women per square mile in Medellin than any other place on earth.


The problem with marriage agencies is that the best looking and most desirable women aren't in them. If you have the time and money ....you will almost certainly have better luck by opening yourself up to entire population of any city you visit as opposed to the small cross section of women that are willing to join a marriage agency.

Same with Whatsapp.
Send her a message from someone elses phone.
If the other phone geta double clicked (meaning she recieved the messages)and you a single, she blocked you.

Doesnt Master if her icono is "grey " that could be in personal settings or she could have just charges her profile to blank.

But from what you said Sounds like she "ghosted" you.

Medellín women are the worst for leading a guy on and then ghosting or whatever.

Another explanation is  she has another long term gringo or foreigner on the internet.

A lot of these girls have "Gatos Cerrados."..all kinds of secrets and other relationships hidden..unless they have you " hooked" ..then she may tell you about her "exes" and all the guys who are making passes at her (some of whom may actually be sleeping with her in the present).

This is called "triangulation" by psycologists and is meant to.make you jeaulous so she can manipulate you.

Its best not to take anything seriously and have  many "Irons in the fire" yourseld until you are actually living together.

And if your are thinking seriously about a woman and your intuictión is telling you that something is funny, best to hire a PI.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: benjio on December 09, 2018, 01:12:52 PM
You can set your FB profile up so it’s not searchable or even visible to people who aren’t already your friends. This also translates to Not being visible through another persons friends list. Elex’s recommendation for figuring out if she’s still using WhatsApp could work as well. But at this point who cares. All this really has no importance but to assume she would completely remove herself from social media to avoid contact with you is a bit farfetched. You’re blocked...and it’s probably because of another guy. Maybe foreign. Maybe domestic. She could have just as easily remained friends with you and tried to get something out of you. A free dinner or trip to the disco with her and some friends for instance. But she didn’t...she needed you completely gone to:

1. Avoid the confrontation of having to cancel after you made all those plans

2. Salvage a relationship she had or is still currently having because she told the guy about you to make him jealous or he found out about you on his own..

Again, Elex makes some great points here. Almost every younger (18-25 y/o) Colombian Woman I’ve met does that triangulation thing. Not only to manipulate you through jealousy, but to reaffirm your idea of their worth by informing you they have plenty of other options. In their minds this is supposed to make you feel like you’re very lucky to have them. The truth is however, if you’re young, relatively good looking and/or have a bit of money, your options in countries like Colombia are endless.

This is why I don’t agree with Elex with respect to hiring a PI. I came close to doing that once but a Colombiano friend of mine gave me some really good advice:

“If something she’s doing is giving you enough doubt to pay the cost of a PI (which is never cheap if you use a reputable agency) she’s not the one for you!!

Colombianas love HARD!!!!!! There will be no doubt if you find one that truly falls for you. They will whine and complain if you don’t call or text. They won’t ask you for money because they won’t want you to think they’re trying to use you. No matter how poor they are. They will want to have sex CONSTANTLY!!! And most importantly they’ll want to show you off. A lot of Colombianas date guys for money and behind closed doors they’re the perfect girlfriends, but they’ll never want to be seen in public with these guys.

Get used to the flakiness which will happen even after you’ve already met a girl in person. Don’t over examine it or take it personally. It’s like Americans chatting with strangers and leaving tips. It’s just part of their culture.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on December 09, 2018, 02:29:20 PM
Well no.matter how young or good looking you are you.will be pretty luck to find one that wants sex all the time and never asks or hints in some way at money..ja ja

One guy on PBH said "I tried pretending I had no money for a couple weeks, living in a hostal and eating in local cheap restaurants.Pretty soon I only had 50 yo toothless Colomianas hanging around me. They just couldnt believe it was possible that a Gringo couldnt have money.Well, eventually it sunk inand they gave Up as well..and I was left alone"
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: ag1987 on December 09, 2018, 02:39:37 PM
Yeah, it is water under the bridge at this point and I don't really care why she disappeared. Sucks, but probably won't be the last LOL.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: benjio on December 09, 2018, 02:54:11 PM
Well no.matter how young or good looking you are you.will be pretty luck to find one that wants sex all the time and never asks or hints in some way at money..

It’s funny you say that because you see the trolls they date and let impregnate them from the barrio knowing they are also completely broke and it blows your mind!!! Gringos are held to an entirely different standard though. And it’s not always the case of you having to buy them things or support them. I’ve dated girls that were doing pretty well for themselves and didn’t need a dime from me. As a gringo, you just can’t be dead broke and expect to date any quality woman in Latin America.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on December 09, 2018, 02:55:56 PM
Well no.matter how young or good looking you are you.will be pretty luck to find one that wants sex all the time and never asks or hints in some way at money..ja ja

One guy on PBH said "I tried pretending I had no money for a couple weeks, living in a hostal and eating in local cheap restaurants.Pretty soon I only had 50 yo toothless Colomianas hanging around me. They just couldnt believe it was possible that a Gringo couldnt have money.Well, eventually it sunk inand they gave Up as well..and I was left alone"

Benjio.a reputable PI in Colombia costs you about 200 mil COP per day


I think it is well worth the money, espescially if you are planning to.marry her and/or bring her to the US, and you havent been living together for a Long time so you dont know her that well.

She may present you to her family and friends, be with you in public when you are there and be very affectionate..but when you are away..other things may happen behind your back..with "other" friends and family members you never met.

Not to mention it is good to.know about her past history, financial debts ,education anything hidden.in the closet.
That being said some girls you know from.intuition you dont need to investigate..you know from the get go they are Skanks..

And if you live with a woman.in Colombia for a year, you will hopefully get to.know her pretty good.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: mambocowboy on December 09, 2018, 05:26:23 PM
Benjio.a reputable PI in Colombia costs you about 200 mil COP per day


I think it is well worth the money, espescially if you are planning to.marry her and/or bring her to the US, and you havent been living together for a Long time so you dont know her that well.

She may present you to her family and friends, be with you in public when you are there and be very affectionate..but when you are away..other things may happen behind your back..with "other" friends and family members you never met.

Not to mention it is good to.know about her past history, financial debts ,education anything hidden.in the closet.
That being said some girls you know from.intuition you dont need to investigate..you know from the get go they are Skanks..

And if you live with a woman.in Colombia for a year, you will hopefully get to.know her pretty good.
I actually agree with rhis. If you are thinking of bringing her to your country and the relationship us long distance,  you have so much at stake. Makes sense...
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: benjio on December 09, 2018, 07:49:07 PM
Benjio.a reputable PI in Colombia costs you about 200 mil COP per day


I think it is well worth the money, espescially if you are planning to.marry her and/or bring her to the US, and you havent been living together for a Long time so you dont know her that well.

She may present you to her family and friends, be with you in public when you are there and be very affectionate..but when you are away..other things may happen behind your back..with "other" friends and family members you never met.

Not to mention it is good to.know about her past history, financial debts ,education anything hidden.in the closet.
That being said some girls you know from.intuition you dont need to investigate..you know from the get go they are Skanks..

And if you live with a woman.in Colombia for a year, you will hopefully get to.know her pretty good.

The Agency I spoke with in Bogota was much more expensive than that. And I’ve done freelance IT work for an agency in the states. It’s not the daily rate. It’s all those itemized extras that kill you. Transportation, photos, bribes and payoffs to get information out of people (which are always inflated if paid in cash). What kills clients that employ PI’s is getting an expert to trace digital footprints on social media which isn’t cheap anywhere. Almost all infedelity these days is initiated and maintained online. So maybe your girl isn’t exactly cheating with someone in Colombia. Maybe it’s another gringo or a European Guy that only visits her twice a year. You’re saying that $200K pesos per day won’t add up while they are trying to figure out exactly what’s going on with a guy she’s only communicated with online? What do you think? PI’s follow the girls into internet cafes and look over their shoulders? What if she has a computer at home or she does everything on an iPhone? You’ve seen too many movies. It really all depends on how long it takes them to figure how they are cheating. Because that’s really the only reason guys consider PI’s. They think the girl is cheating. I’ve literally NEVER heard a gringo about to bring a girl to the states mention any concern with a girl’s credit score.

I definitely see your point about financial background, criminal records, etc. However, those things are done through online background check servives these days. Even in Latin America. You think companies that hire people for jobs with significant security or financial implications employ PI’s each time they need to figure out if a potential employee is a former bank robber just because the position is SOTB? Think about that question for a second. PI’s almost always add up and they are employed to see what someone is doing or have done in the real world. Not something they did that created a digital record. That’s all in cyberspace now. You just have to know how to grab it.

I’m still of the opinion these girls simply aren’t that good at being deceptive. There’s always some break in patterns or a lie that simply doesn’t make sense. You can feel and see these things when you’re not 100% blinded by beauty and great sex. If I was that unsure about a girl’s fidelity and I couln’t figure it out on my own, I’d much quicker buy her an iPhone and put spyware on it. I may be wrong, but I think you’d still come out cheaper than hiring a PI in most circumstances. Again though, if your gut is telling you that, just break it off. Too many beautiful girls down there that won’t give you a second thought when it comes to her devotion to you.

Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Wildstubby on December 09, 2018, 09:44:22 PM
benjio said:
Quote
The Agency I spoke with in Bogota was much more expensive than that. And I’ve done freelance IT work for an agency in the states. It’s not the daily rate. It’s all those itemized extras that kill you. Transportation, photos, bribes and payoffs to get information out of people (which are always inflated if paid in cash). What kills clients that employ PI’s is getting an expert to trace digital footprints on social media which isn’t cheap anywhere. Almost all infedelity these days is initiated and maintained online. So maybe your girl isn’t exactly cheating with someone in Colombia. Maybe it’s another gringo or a European Guy that only visits her twice a year. You’re saying that $200K pesos per day won’t add up while they are trying to figure out exactly what’s going on with a guy she’s only communicated with online? What do you think? PI’s follow the girls into internet cafes and look over their shoulders? What if she has a computer at home or she does everything on an iPhone? You’ve seen too many movies. It really all depends on how long it takes them to figure how they are cheating. Because that’s really the only reason guys consider PI’s. They think the girl is cheating. I’ve literally NEVER heard a gringo about to bring a girl to the states mention any concern with a girl’s credit score.

I definitely see your point about financial background, criminal records, etc. However, those things are done through online background check servives these days. Even in Latin America. You think companies that hire people for jobs with significant security or financial implications employ PI’s each time they need to figure out if a potential employee is a former bank robber just because the position is SOTB? Think about that question for a second. PI’s almost always add up and they are employed to see what someone is doing or have done in the real world. Not something they did that created a digital record. That’s all in cyberspace now. You just have to know how to grab it.

I’m still of the opinion these girls simply aren’t that good at being deceptive. There’s always some break in patterns or a lie that simply doesn’t make sense. You can feel and see these things when you’re not 100% blinded by beauty and great sex. If I was that unsure about a girl’s fidelity and I couln’t figure it out on my own, I’d much quicker buy her an iPhone and put spyware on it. I may be wrong, but I think you’d still come out cheaper than hiring a PI in most circumstances. Again though, if your gut is telling you that, just break it off. Too many beautiful girls down there that won’t give you a second thought when it comes to her devotion to you.
Read that next to the last line over and over again!!!!! Red flag goes up, cut it and move to the next one! Simple as that. I met a girl in Bogota. We went out together and had some good sex. When I returned to Bogota, we went out to eat and she had 3 cell phones!!! Yeah that's right 3 cellulars! I'm thinking WTF!!! She wasn't paying much attention to me. The next day I moved from hotel near Parque 93 to one near the airport because of an early AM flight. She was supposed to contact me. About 4 hours later she says she couldn't because her battery died on the cell phone! Next!!!!!! There are enough women in Colombia to pacify you! Don't waste your time with those who have 'issues'! Just get the hell out and don't look back. Otherwise you will regret it!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Hector_Lavoe on December 09, 2018, 10:51:24 PM



If I had a ticket to Medellin with time off....I would have gotten on that plane.
There are more hot women per square mile in Medellin than any other place on earth.


Yep, I would make that statement about BOTH Medellin and Cali.  Do you think Medellin has the edge on Cali with regards to hot women per capita?
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: robert angel on December 10, 2018, 09:33:57 AM
Again, if a girl's on line and she's claiming you're 'the one' --you can have a friend who has a pretty good profile, approach her and see if she bites. Ask him to ask her if there's anyone else, serious or otherwise, any one planning to visit her,  etc.

Just like us guys, most of these women have a lot of baited lines in the water, ''trot lines' as us fishermen call them, stretching for miles sometimes, just seeing what they can catch.

Especially when I was  covering China and also to a lesser extent, Eastern Europe, I had some babes that made me think I was THE ONE, only to 'poof' disappear wit out a trace after a period of intense, regular contact.. A better 'fish' a better 'catch' had probably came along.

They can seem all sweet, mushy, loyal and sentimental,  but when it comes down to the lifestyle they think you can or can't provide, they often become coldly analytical. And you become instantly disposable, without warning or explanation. Or at best, half assed excuses.

You can even have a woman that for the longest time seems tried and true, who is just taking a very long time to 'set the hook' and take advantage of you.

I didn't know my first wife had over stayed her registered nurse visa here until well after we married. She spoiled me rotten, but she was an illegal alien, right here in the USA. Even BEFORE we married, she persuaded me to buy a nice house, which really kept the ball rolling. I was a tool. She was able to 99% hide her PTSD, and other personality issues for a very long time.

And that wasn't even an online affair--another nurse I knew personally introduced us.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Calipro on December 10, 2018, 10:14:40 AM

Yep, I would make that statement about BOTH Medellin and Cali.  Do you think Medellin has the edge on Cali with regards to hot women per capita?


For my tastes Medellin wins out over Cali....just because women are a bit thinner overall in Medellin and I prefer a very petite woman. But if you are into the bootylicious babes Cali or Baranquilla is a better option.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Calipro on December 10, 2018, 10:33:14 AM
benjio said:Read that next to the last line over and over again!!!!! Red flag goes up, cut it and move to the next one! Simple as that. I met a girl in Bogota. We went out together and had some good sex. When I returned to Bogota, we went out to eat and she had 3 cell phones!!! Yeah that's right 3 cellulars! I'm thinking WTF!!! She wasn't paying much attention to me. The next day I moved from hotel near Parque 93 to one near the airport because of an early AM flight. She was supposed to contact me. About 4 hours later she says she couldn't because her battery died on the cell phone! Next!!!!!! There are enough women in Colombia to pacify you! Don't waste your time with those who have 'issues'! Just get the hell out and don't look back. Otherwise you will regret it!


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yed9G8cMEeg
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: benjio on December 10, 2018, 11:55:09 AM

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yed9G8cMEeg

Bill Burr and Patrice O’Neal....I know it’s only stand up but their comedy is gospel when it comes to women. O’Neal actually sharpened his teeth spending time in Rio.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on December 10, 2018, 02:15:15 PM
The Agency I spoke with in Bogota was much more expensive than that. And I’ve done freelance IT work for an agency in the states. It’s not the daily rate. It’s all those itemized extras that kill you. Transportation, photos, bribes and payoffs to get information out of people (which are always inflated if paid in cash). What kills clients that employ PI’s is getting an expert to trace digital footprints on social media which isn’t cheap anywhere. Almost all infedelity these days is initiated and maintained online. So maybe your girl isn’t exactly cheating with someone in Colombia. Maybe it’s another gringo or a European Guy that only visits her twice a year. You’re saying that $200K pesos per day won’t add up while they are trying to figure out exactly what’s going on with a guy she’s only communicated with online? What do you think? PI’s follow the girls into internet cafes and look over their shoulders? What if she has a computer at home or she does everything on an iPhone? You’ve seen too many movies. It really all depends on how long it takes them to figure how they are cheating. Because that’s really the only reason guys consider PI’s. They think the girl is cheating. I’ve literally NEVER heard a gringo about to bring a girl to the states mention any concern with a girl’s credit score.

I definitely see your point about financial background, criminal records, etc. However, those things are done through online background check servives these days. Even in Latin America. You think companies that hire people for jobs with significant security or financial implications employ PI’s each time they need to figure out if a potential employee is a former bank robber just because the position is SOTB? Think about that question for a second. PI’s almost always add up and they are employed to see what someone is doing or have done in the real world. Not something they did that created a digital record. That’s all in cyberspace now. You just have to know how to grab it.

I’m still of the opinion these girls simply aren’t that good at being deceptive. There’s always some break in patterns or a lie that simply doesn’t make sense. You can feel and see these things when you’re not 100% blinded by beauty and great sex. If I was that unsure about a girl’s fidelity and I couln’t figure it out on my own, I’d much quicker buy her an iPhone and put spyware on it. I may be wrong, but I think you’d still come out cheaper than hiring a PI in most circumstances. Again though, if your gut is telling you that, just break it off. Too many beautiful girls down there that won’t give you a second thought when it comes to her devotion to you.

The rate I got in the eje cafetero include fotos and transportation. You were definitely being charged gringo rates.
Of course they charge you extra for other things.
A lot of things you can do yourself as a matte of fact you would be way more efficient at doing them yourself.Like a fake Facebook ID and approach her as another guy...as Sugested by Robert. I actually know a guy ( on this site) who has done that..and the phone bug thing too. The way Facebook is nowadays without any privacy and giving your data to everyone,  you become her friend,  befriend a couple of her friends, and before you know it one or more of her fake profiles (if she has one) will come up as as a "friend suggest".

I know this as I have a fake Facebook site without my pictures I use for making political comments on News sites, and my real Facebook profile, plus people from my real Facebook site come up as "friend requests"LOL
Her Whatsapp account and cellphone is a little bit harder to get access to.Only way is to.buy her a cell phone with spyware or have some one steal her phone. A PI cant help you with that.

Both are risky.And if she finds out it was you, which would be a logical conclusión in the case of the spyware, your relationship would be done ..even.if she was innocent.

You can buy a list of her last incoming and outgoing cell.phone calls for the last month  for about 1million to 1.5 million pesos , depending if it is Claro or Moviestar.

Also you can get a list of entrys and éxits into and out of Colombia for any person  if you bride migraciones for about the same price.

These are both illegal and have to be done through a competent PI though, but after all this is Colombia and "money talks"

Even if you spend 6 million pesos, a couple  thousand US dollars..it would be worrth it to save you a big headache / heartache and a lot more money later.

But personally for me the best solution is never get married and bring her to the US.

Just live with her in Colombia and  keep your money
 In the US (or wherever)


Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on December 10, 2018, 02:38:03 PM
Benjio ifshe had a guy that visited her from overseas twice a year I think that would end after she moves in with you..whether in US or Colombia. And if he visited her when you were away, the PI  would find out.

You would be looking for something more serious than that..which is basically a previos relationship..you are looking for present infidelites, general honesty,character  and morality.

Which you may not need a Pi for unless she is the World greatest actress
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: ag1987 on December 10, 2018, 03:17:04 PM
Anyone here that has brought their wife to the states successfully? I am not in a position to move to Colombia, at least until I am retirement-eligible in 15 years...
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: benjio on December 10, 2018, 03:30:07 PM
Anyone here that has brought their wife to the states successfully? I am not in a position to move to Colombia, at least until I am retirement-eligible in 15 years...

Dude, PLENTY OF GUYS!!! Please don’t let us discourage you. It’s just that when you’ve lived and dated in Colombia for a while you realize it isn’t all peaches and cream. They are gorgeous women there. A LOT OF THEM!!! Probably more than you’ll ever see anywhere else. But beautiful doesn’t exactly mean marriage material. And it’s literally the worse place on Earth to be thinking with the wrong head!! Go for it!! Just be smart!!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Wildstubby on December 10, 2018, 05:10:36 PM
ag1987 said:
Quote
Anyone here that has brought their wife to the states successfully? I am not in a position to move to Colombia, at least until I am retirement-eligible in 15 years...
I am beginning that process now as we speak. (much to elex's chagrin!)
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: mambocowboy on December 10, 2018, 06:38:03 PM
Anyone here that has brought their wife to the states successfully? I am not in a position to move to Colombia, at least until I am retirement-eligible in 15 years...
Yes a bunch of us. I am at almost 7 years married.  Plenty of bumps along the way but still going strong...
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: utopiacowboy on December 11, 2018, 08:31:44 AM
Anyone here that has brought their wife to the states successfully? I am not in a position to move to Colombia, at least until I am retirement-eligible in 15 years...


My wife was a widow with three children from Medellin when I married her in 2003. Here we are 15 years later living in San Antonio, Texas and still speaking Spanish every day. She has changed very little in that time. She managed a large shop of textile workers in Itaqui back in Colombia and now she manages a large shop of automotive assembly workers here. Her kids are all grown up, college graduates and each of them successful in their careers.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on December 11, 2018, 08:51:32 AM
ag1987 said:I am beginning that process now as we speak. (much to elex's chagrin!)

Chagrin?
I dont really care what you do as I stated before. What gave you that idea?


But for newbies,in spite of UCs sucess story, I wouldnt recommed anyone bring an extended family to the US(more than just a single childless women). It is pretty obviious to anyone  that that is a major headache and major  personal sacrifice.

"Starting the process" is a long , long  way from "success" ..come talk to us in 5 years

Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on December 11, 2018, 08:57:52 AM
Anyone here that has brought their wife to the states successfully? I am not in a position to move to Colombia, at least until I am retirement-eligible in 15 years...


I know 4 guys at least here on this site , who dont post it as much, who have been married to at least one Colombiana and it didnt work out.

Two of them.have been married to Colombianas múltiple times.

I myself am still technically married to one, but I havent talked to her in 6 years. But I wasnt dumb enough to bring her to Canadá (other than a tourist visa) though.


Does that qualify as success?
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on December 11, 2018, 09:10:54 AM
My friend was in the Lawyers office recently and talked to a young guy who was married to a Colombiana for 6 months.

Bought her a house for 360 million. They divorced, she gets the house.

What a bonehead.
Too many guys driving up the price of pu$$y. Settling for second or third best and spending too.much money.
I include myself in the "spending too much money" on the women category, but at least I have it, and I am 62 yo. And I wont be buying anyone cars or houses, boob and butt implants and dragging them and their Extended family to.the US.

Any guy, especially young guys, shouldnt be spoiling the girls, buying them a house..stop driving the price of pu$$y up. Your are ruining it for everyone else. Lots of competition from other girls out there, i.e. all the
Venezuelanas coming to Colombia who would settle for a lot less
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Calipro on December 11, 2018, 10:20:16 AM
Anyone here that has brought their wife to the states successfully? I am not in a position to move to Colombia, at least until I am retirement-eligible in 15 years...


I have been happily married to 3 Colombianas.....the second one never came to the states and if I had to do it all over again I wouldn't have married her. But two out of three ain't bad. jajaja
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Calipro on December 11, 2018, 10:30:39 AM
My friend was in the Lawyers office recently and talked to a young guy who was married to a Colombiana for 6 months.

Bought her a house for 360 million. They divorced, she gets the house.

What a bonehead.
Too many guys driving up the price of pu$$y. Settling for second or third best and spending too.much money.
I include myself in the "spending too much money" on the women category, but at least I have it, and I am 62 yo. And I wont be buying anyone cars or houses, boob and butt implants and dragging them and their Extended family to.the US.

Any guy, especially young guys, shouldnt be spoiling the girls, buying them a house..stop driving the price of pu$$y up. Your are ruining it for everyone else. Lots of competition from other girls out there, i.e. all the
Venezuelanas coming to Colombia who would settle for a lot less


You don't believe everything you hear...do you......getting 360 million pesos into Colombia is a lot of work and a time consuming process. Then he would have had to buy the house in just her name before they got married for him to not get half the house.


At some point you have to do a reality check when you hear the scary stories they tell around the camp fire.



Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: benjio on December 11, 2018, 10:38:06 AM

I know 4 guys at least here on this site , who dont post it as much, who have been married to at least one Colombiana and it didnt work out.

Two of them.have been married to Colombianas múltiple times.

I myself am still technically married to one, but I havent talked to her in 6 years. But I wasnt dumb enough to bring her to Canadá (other than a tourist visa) though.


Does that qualify as success?

Including the gentlemen on this site, if Fathertime is still with his wife, I know 9 guys with marriages to Costeñas that have stood the test of time. I know dozens that brought women here from the Coast of Colombia and they were done within 2 years. One guy that owned an IT Company and his wife was embezzling money from him for months. A couple that left their husbands for their personal trainers (Always, always, ALWAYS make your wife get a straight, female personal trainer or refuse to pay for it!!). Another that let a friend convince her she could do a lot better than the guy that brought her here because she was very attractive. Ended up getting deported. A lot of them that press false domestic violence charges against their husbands so they didn’t have to get deported. The list goes on and on.

The combination of three characterics makes marriages to Costeñas much less likely to succeed when you bring them to the states:

1. If they are exceptionally attractive they will very quickly realize what a higher commodity they are here. A 7 in Barranquilla can very easily be a 10 in Dallas. You will inevitably have to compete with younger, better looking men with more money and you can’t be around her all the time. She will be pursued by other men. This comes down to a question of how much she really loves you.

2. They tend to live for the moment and make split second decisions without thinking about the circumstances. This kind of links in with the 1st point, because there could be a guy promising her the world that just wants to get her in bed. Then she leaves you for him, he gets what he wants and ditches her. She just destroyed a marriage for instant gratification. And she’ll try to come crawling back but what self-respecting man would forgive her? The “living for the moment” approach can also cause huge issues with finances. You’re trying to build a nest egg for retirement and all they see is a big number in an account that you both could be spending up. They have very little sense or patience for financial planning and the future.

3. The worst thing is the American Culture is not one that nutures the idea of devoted, lifelong marriages. There are several billion dollar industries that thrive on the fact that women have absolutely no problem leaving their husbands if they aren’t satified with him. In this #METOO age men are immediately viewed as the bad guy when a marriage doesn’t work and usually we have to pay dearly for our “transgressions.”
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Calipro on December 11, 2018, 11:16:47 AM
Including the gentlemen on this site, if Fathertime is still with his wife, I know 9 guys with marriages to Costeñas that have stood the test of time. I know dozens that brought women here from the Coast of Colombia and they were done within 2 years. One guy that owned an IT Company and his wife was embezzling money from him for months. A couple that left their husbands for their personal trainers (Always, always, ALWAYS make your wife get a straight, female personal trainer or refuse to pay for it!!). Another that let a friend convince her she could do a lot better than the guy that brought her here because she was very attractive. Ended up getting deported. A lot of them that press false domestic violence charges against their husbands so they didn’t have to get deported. The list goes on and on.

The combination of three characterics makes marriages to Costeñas much less likely to succeed when you bring them to the states:

1. If they are exceptionally attractive they will very quickly realize what a higher commodity they are here. A 7 in Barranquilla can very easily be a 10 in Dallas. You will inevitably have to compete with younger, better looking men with more money and you can’t be around her all the time. She will be pursued by other men. This comes down to a question of how much she really loves you.

2. They tend to live for the moment and make split second decisions without thinking about the circumstances. This kind of links in with the 1st point, because there could be a guy promising her the world that just wants to get her in bed. Then she leaves you for him, he gets what he wants and ditches her. She just destroyed a marriage for instant gratification. And she’ll try to come crawling back but what self-respecting man would forgive her? The “living for the moment” approach can also cause huge issues with finances. You’re trying to build a nest egg for retirement and all they see is a big number in an account that you both could be spending up. They have very little sense or patience for financial planning and the future.

3. The worst thing is the American Culture is not one that nutures the idea of devoted, lifelong marriages. There are several billion dollar industries that thrive on the fact that women have absolutely no problem leaving their husbands if they aren’t satified with him. In this #METOO age men are immediately viewed as the bad guy when a marriage doesn’t work and usually we have to pay dearly for our “transgressions.”


And number 4 guys that just don't know what they are doing and lying to themselves about why they are doing it.


I you are bringing a hot Colombiana to the states with no plans of forming a family and having children with her then just own up to the fact that you are bringing over a semi captive sex toy that will escape one day. jajaja
And if she has no interest in having children with you then see doesn't see the relationship between the two of you lasing
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on December 11, 2018, 12:17:56 PM

You don't believe everything you hear...do you......getting 360 million pesos into Colombia is a lot of work and a time consuming process. Then he would have had to buy the house in just her name before they got married for him to not get half the house.


At some point you have to do a reality check when you hear the scary stories they tell around the camp fire.

I agree..

In retrospect, the guy who told me the story is a real good friend ..but also a real big BSer..
But a year is quite a Long period where stuff like this could actually  happen..could have bought it in his name and just given it to her..if he was loaded and no skin off his back

Problem is stories like this ..whether true or not..emboldens the chicas and  them that "entitled" attitude.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: robert angel on December 11, 2018, 02:00:09 PM
Including the gentlemen on this site, if Fathertime is still with his wife, I know 9 guys with marriages to Costeñas that have stood the test of time. I know dozens that brought women here from the Coast of Colombia and they were done within 2 years. One guy that owned an IT Company and his wife was embezzling money from him for months. A couple that left their husbands for their personal trainers (Always, always, ALWAYS make your wife get a straight, female personal trainer or refuse to pay for it!!). Another that let a friend convince her she could do a lot better than the guy that brought her here because she was very attractive. Ended up getting deported. A lot of them that press false domestic violence charges against their husbands so they didn’t have to get deported. The list goes on and on.

The combination of three characterics makes marriages to Costeñas much less likely to succeed when you bring them to the states:

1. If they are exceptionally attractive they will very quickly realize what a higher commodity they are here. A 7 in Barranquilla can very easily be a 10 in Dallas. You will inevitably have to compete with younger, better looking men with more money and you can’t be around her all the time. She will be pursued by other men. This comes down to a question of how much she really loves you.

2. They tend to live for the moment and make split second decisions without thinking about the circumstances. This kind of links in with the 1st point, because there could be a guy promising her the world that just wants to get her in bed. Then she leaves you for him, he gets what he wants and ditches her. She just destroyed a marriage for instant gratification. And she’ll try to come crawling back but what self-respecting man would forgive her? The “living for the moment” approach can also cause huge issues with finances. You’re trying to build a nest egg for retirement and all they see is a big number in an account that you both could be spending up. They have very little sense or patience for financial planning and the future.

3. The worst thing is the American Culture is not one that nutures the idea of devoted, lifelong marriages. There are several billion dollar industries that thrive on the fact that women have absolutely no problem leaving their husbands if they aren’t satified with him. In this #METOO age men are immediately viewed as the bad guy when a marriage doesn’t work and usually we have to pay dearly for our “transgressions.”

So much of this has been said countless times, albeit worded differently here and there, but it does sound like a broken record and at that, one that falls on pretty much deaf ears.

Guys are just, especially at first, blinded to not just the sad realities, but to the even sadder possibilities likely down n the road they're traveling.

I dare say most of the above pertains to women in and outside of the USA, but obviously the pit falls of bringing a bride to the USA from abroad, pertain to that category of women. Once any woman, from here or there, gets married and resides in the USA, the playing board and the rules of the game, are the same.

I had to learn the hard way, even though my best friend then (and he still is now and he thinks my current wife is GREAT) not only refused to be my 'Best Man' at my first wedding, but he even refused to be in the wedding party PERIOD. That's because he saw and warned me that he didn't feel she was 'right' for me. HE saw the flags. I didn't listen. And again, he told me, point blank......

Maybe some of the readers, members, 'lurkers' here--whatever, DO gain useful insights on this site, but I think that the vast majority will be blinded by beautiful lady's wiles and charms, that they will ignore potential red flags described to them here, and ignore them increasingly in proportion to just how hot the woman is.

In other words, they will tolerate sh!t from a babe they view as a 9 or 10, sh!t they wouldn't go near, were she a relative 7 instead.

It's as if our cocks are like the  'divining rods' of olden days. Quackery yes, but instead of us expecting them to miraculously find water, or mineral wealth, we let our brains be foolishly persuaded, blinded by our dicks and eyes, abandoning sound knowledge, brains disengaged, oblivious to what was previously told us.

I suppose we get what we deserve most of the time, as the pros and cons of the different scenarios here have been set forth countless times.

I think most of the regulars here have been losers at this game at least once, many of us actually more than once, but if anybody is really learning as we go, it's us, rather than vast majority of newbies.

This is a site where the train wreck stories run on forever, becoming favorite, ongoing topics, but where any attempt at humor or anecdotes, outside of largely negative takes on women and the pursuit of them, are all but ignored.

This place sorely lacks a sense of variety and  humor. If anybody IS laughing, I don't think anyone's hearing it. Meanwhile, our 'advice' doesn't seem to do much good.

Hard to quantify the success -- failure rate of relationships discussed and consumated here, because 99% of the time, we never hear back. That generally means the story is not good.

No wonder this place is running on fumes---> "Is this crazy??"
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Wildstubby on December 11, 2018, 03:03:57 PM
benjio said:
Quote
3. The worst thing is the American Culture is not one that nutures the idea of devoted, lifelong marriages. There are several billion dollar industries that thrive on the fact that women have absolutely no problem leaving their husbands if they aren’t satified with him. In this #METOO age men are immediately viewed as the bad guy when a marriage doesn’t work and usually we have to pay dearly for our “transgressions.”
Alimony is when 2 people make a mistake and one person pays for it. "When she said 'I do', I should've asked, 'With whom?", (Rodney Dangerfield). Ok, there's the humor. Now for the medicine: When my divorce came around, my lawyer said it was going to be 45-55% split with me on the 45% end. When the beans were counted, that is pretty much how it came out. This was a red-headed American woman! So there's no guarantees because of that X-gene if you will win or lose. But it is what you put into it as to what you will get out of it. And that goes with premarital romance also. Me, I could of had a late 20~early 30 something but I preferred to have someone with a bit more of a maturity level. Hence I found a woman who is 45 and is perfect for what I want and need in a companion. She has 2 kids and yeah, I didn't count on being 'daddy' again at this stage in my life, but I am ok with it! The boy wants to join the military as soon as he gets here. So, to the OP that initiated the original post, you got both sides. Look but don't leap! If you think it is good, test the waters and let it go from there. But like any other relationship you might have, even here in the US, don't turn your back or a blind eye to what is going on around you!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: robert angel on December 11, 2018, 06:08:40 PM

 Me, I could of had a late 20~early 30 something but I preferred to have someone with a bit more of a maturity level. Hence I found a woman who is 45 and is perfect for what I want and need in a companion. She has 2 kids and yeah, I didn't count on being 'daddy' again at this stage in my life, but I am ok with it! The boy wants to join the military as soon as he gets here. So, to the OP that initiated the original post, you got both sides. Look but don't leap! If you think it is good, test the waters and let it go from there. But like any other relationship you might have, even here in the US, don't turn your back or a blind eye to what is going on around you!

While it goes against prevailing advice here, at one time I considered marrying a woman from the Philippines who already had a son. Ultimately it was issues with the woman, such as dramas and a sudden and then an increasing number of 'emergencies', which always required my cash to resolve, that ruined it. Add in her ever present jealousy (took a while to see that clearly) and I knew it wasn't gonna get better.

But her kid had nothing to do with me quitting on her. In fact if anything, it made it harder.

Sure, it opens up some risk factors, but then and now, I feel that with the RIGHT woman and situation, a Father walking into the role of
Dad and husband can inspire great, long-lasting gratitude and loyalty from the woman. It can be a plus or a negative.

Yes, in Latin America a boy, especially a young boy and an immature Mother can lead to "Little Prince Syndrome" -- where the new Stepdad will forever be 'second banana' to the child, sometimes to his face or worse yet behind it, but each situation needs to be evaluated on its own merits.

I have had an extraordinary life and it obviously started early, when I was to put it mildly, an extreme juvenile delinquent. I even pretty much carried that tack in life into my thirties. I'm still a tough act to have as a husband. Self destructive. The legal statute of limitations on most of the things I did has probably expired, but it'd be long ass post for me to recount even half the crap I did. Even sending me out of the country, to a now closed boarding school, famous for taking on the hardest cases, one that claimed "We Never kick any boys out" even they couldn't stop me and  Lord knows they beat the bejesus out of me trying. Took me a lot of effort and a series of international crimes, but in less than a year, I was out!

While for close to 35 years I had work that involved helping people from age three to 107 years old, I don't think I'll ever be able to adequately give back the amount of love, goodness and patience, never mind extraordinary luck, that I have gotten from others and in life overall.

But like the Shriners say: "No man stands so tall as when he stoops to help a child." And although my son's are now 22 and 27 years old, they'll always be my 'children.' And they, as well as kids who aren't even of my own flesh and blood, will always have my heart.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: mambocowboy on December 11, 2018, 07:46:14 PM
Including the gentlemen on this site, if Fathertime is still with his wife, I know 9 guys with marriages to Costeñas that have stood the test of time. I know dozens that brought women here from the Coast of Colombia and they were done within 2 years. One guy that owned an IT Company and his wife was embezzling money from him for months. A couple that left their husbands for their personal trainers (Always, always, ALWAYS make your wife get a straight, female personal trainer or refuse to pay for it!!). Another that let a friend convince her she could do a lot better than the guy that brought her here because she was very attractive. Ended up getting deported. A lot of them that press false domestic violence charges against their husbands so they didn’t have to get deported. The list goes on and on.

The combination of three characterics makes marriages to Costeñas much less likely to succeed when you bring them to the states:

1. If they are exceptionally attractive they will very quickly realize what a higher commodity they are here. A 7 in Barranquilla can very easily be a 10 in Dallas. You will inevitably have to compete with younger, better looking men with more money and you can’t be around her all the time. She will be pursued by other men. This comes down to a question of how much she really loves you.

2. They tend to live for the moment and make split second decisions without thinking about the circumstances. This kind of links in with the 1st point, because there could be a guy promising her the world that just wants to get her in bed. Then she leaves you for him, he gets what he wants and ditches her. She just destroyed a marriage for instant gratification. And she’ll try to come crawling back but what self-respecting man would forgive her? The “living for the moment” approach can also cause huge issues with finances. You’re trying to build a nest egg for retirement and all they see is a big number in an account that you both could be spending up. They have very little sense or patience for financial planning and the future.

3. The worst thing is the American Culture is not one that nutures the idea of devoted, lifelong marriages. There are several billion dollar industries that thrive on the fact that women have absolutely no problem leaving their husbands if they aren’t satified with him. In this #METOO age men are immediately viewed as the bad guy when a marriage doesn’t work and usually we have to pay dearly for our “transgressions.”
#2 is so freaking accurate but hard to truly understand until you live with a Colombiana. My wife is the most spontaneous woman I have ever met. She is also incredibly impulsive,  easily influenced, and has great difficulty saving money...I have met numerous Barranquilleras married to gringos and they are all like this. If you are married to a Barranquillera you will have good sex  , fight over money, and have great makeup sex...
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: robert angel on December 12, 2018, 09:31:18 AM
#2 is so freaking accurate but hard to truly understand until you live with a Colombiana. My wife is the most spontaneous woman I have ever met. She is also incredibly impulsive,  easily influenced, and has great difficulty saving money...I have met numerous Barranquilleras married to gringos and they are all like this. If you are married to a Barranquillera you will have good sex  , fight over money, and have great makeup sex...

I had an Uncle married to a Puerto Rican woman. Actually three Uncles married PR women. She treated me like a prince. I stayed at their house a lot of weekends and if I had a date, she'd always give me money to take a girl to movie, maybe even for food after. Told me in a coy way to to "remember the umbrella"--which eventually, I realized meant bring and use a condom.

My Uncle was a Golden Gloves Bronx, NY boxing champion and my Aunt was a stunning beauty. They were both physically very 'beautiful' people, and with kind, generous hearts. Typically people that are that attractive and materially well off aren't like them.

They were very religious, but very sensuous, They had impeccable manners, but at times, could swear like sailors, in both Spanish and English. I am sure they had sex that was hot enough to cause the wall paper to peel off the walls.

"Kisses and Hand Grenades" is how they described their marriage.

But he was a long distance trucker and while he made real good money, it was sometimes not as fast as my Aunt could spend it. I remember one time my Uncle made, I guess it was a ten day run, coast to coast. He came back and my Aunt 'surprised' him with a big, in ground pool, diving board, tiled concrete all around the pool, tiki like decoration, real 'PR Style' it was really nice. Trellis over the patio, with fake leaves and Christmas lights to provide shade, a table and seats for the endless Spanish recipes she'd bring out between swims. Man,  I loved that pool. I could bring friends over and they were treated well too, blown away by the experience, the Spanish culture and hospitality.

But money was one of the bigger things they fought about and my Aunt was super impulsive in her spending and other habits. Loved to shop, especially for clothes and she looked great in whatever she bought.  And she always got something for someone else in the family too.

But I'm pretty sure after the fights over her compulsive spending ensued, after the plates were done flying and the broken pieces cleaned up, that their 'make up sex' was incredible.

My wife's pretty good about the long term waiting, although she's changed a bit. She waited thirteen years for a new car (and her first 'learner' car was already very used when I bought it) but lately, she's on me a bit about 'when' am I going to buy our tickets to Europe for next year.

Oh, and while I was delighted that she came back from her vacation to her country and other places last summer with $500 left from the allowance I gave her, I was less than delighted, in fact I was 'speechless,' -- when the next Sunday in church, to thank God for the safe trip and our blessings, she put a HUNDRED dollar bill in the collection basket. I'd gotten to the point where I didn't and still try to not look, but I noticed that time. I mean, like she did it. What was I gonna do after that? Climb over people and yank it out?

I just hope it went to feed people who really need it. Lord knows she's a soft touch already for street people with signs saying they're hungry. She always is out of one dollar bills after we go to town, from gIving them away to those apparently to her, 'less fortunate'. If I say "NO" as we're going into eat somewhere, she orders a meal AND a drink, 'to go'-- to be given to the person outside begging.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: mambocowboy on December 12, 2018, 01:37:50 PM
I had an Uncle married to a Puerto Rican woman. Actually three Uncles married PR women. She treated me like a prince. I stayed at their house a lot of weekends and if I had a date, she'd always give me money to take a girl to movie, maybe even for food after. Told me in a coy way to to "remember the umbrella"--which eventually, I realized meant bring and use a condom.

My Uncle was a Golden Gloves Bronx, NY boxing champion and my Aunt was a stunning beauty. They were both physically very 'beautiful' people, and with kind, generous hearts. Typically people that are that attractive and materially well off aren't like them.

They were very religious, but very sensuous, They had impeccable manners, but at times, could swear like sailors, in both Spanish and English. I am sure they had sex that was hot enough to cause the wall paper to peel off the walls.

"Kisses and Hand Grenades" is how they described their marriage.

But he was a long distance trucker and while he made real good money, it was sometimes not as fast as my Aunt could spend it. I remember one time my Uncle made, I guess it was a ten day run, coast to coast. He came back and my Aunt 'surprised' him with a big, in ground pool, diving board, tiled concrete all around the pool, tiki like decoration, real 'PR Style' it was really nice. Trellis over the patio, with fake leaves and Christmas lights to provide shade, a table and seats for the endless Spanish recipes she'd bring out between swims. Man,  I loved that pool. I could bring friends over and they were treated well too, blown away by the experience, the Spanish culture and hospitality.

But money was one of the bigger things they fought about and my Aunt was super impulsive in her spending and other habits. Loved to shop, especially for clothes and she looked great in whatever she bought.  And she always got something for someone else in the family too.

But I'm pretty sure after the fights over her compulsive spending ensued, after the plates were done flying and the broken pieces cleaned up, that their 'make up sex' was incredible.

My wife's pretty good about the long term waiting, although she's changed a bit. She waited thirteen years for a new car (and her first 'learner' car was already very used when I bought it) but lately, she's on me a bit about 'when' am I going to buy our tickets to Europe for next year.

Oh, and while I was delighted that she came back from her vacation to her country and other places last summer with $500 left from the allowance I gave her, I was less than delighted, in fact I was 'speechless,' -- when the next Sunday in church, to thank God for the safe trip and our blessings, she put a HUNDRED dollar bill in the collection basket. I'd gotten to the point where I didn't and still try to not look, but I noticed that time. I mean, like she did it. What was I gonna do after that? Climb over people and yank it out?

I just hope it went to feed people who really need it. Lord knows she's a soft touch already for street people with signs saying they're hungry. She always is out of one dollar bills after we go to town, from gIving them away to those apparently to her, 'less fortunate'. If I say "NO" as we're going into eat somewhere, she orders a meal AND a drink, 'to go'-- to be given to the person outside begging.
Great story Rob. Most gringos I know married to Colombianas are like me. 40 something, work out ,  argue with our wives over money  and have plenty of make up sex lol
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on December 12, 2018, 05:15:28 PM
Great story Rob. Most gringos I know married to Colombianas are like me. 40 something, work out ,  argue with our wives over money  and have plenty of make up sex lol

I hate the drama..it really drains you
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Wildstubby on December 12, 2018, 05:21:02 PM
I liked it also Rob!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: robert angel on December 12, 2018, 06:31:17 PM
Thanks guys. Seems we don't comment much beyond the occasional "spot on!" when somebody makes a really good post and pretty much nothing, not even taking a second to 'quote post' and adding 'LOL' occurs when one of us tells a particularily funny story.

But obviously people read our stuff--this thread alone has had over 6000 'hits.' It IS crazy, LOL....

MY stuff IS way too long and rambles on and off topic, I realize.

But it's all true. Boy, I wish Ida just grabbed those five hundred dollar bills when my wife showed me and she WAS ready to---after I said/asked, "it's OK, but how much did you go over this time?"

Maybe I sound cheap, but like I said, when that Benjiman hit the church basket and kept moving across,  I wasn't gonna jump up, raising a ruckus and say "Uh, Father Gabe--- hold the homily!"---climb over parishioners all down the pew, and pull that $100 bill out and maybe stick a 10 or 20 in!

Heck, we like to date, eat out Friday nights and again if we go to church, eat out after. But when out, we order water with lemon to drink! And we catch daytime movie matinees on weekends....
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: buenopues4 on December 13, 2018, 03:48:38 PM
T

 Boy, I wish Ida just grabbed those five hundred dollar bills when my wife...




Robert you seeing Ida on the side?
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Wildstubby on December 13, 2018, 04:11:18 PM
 ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: robert angel on December 13, 2018, 06:09:22 PM

Robert you seeing Ida on the side?

LOL...Ida been caught already. I get away with enough for a while, but eventually 'it all comes out in the wash'...

I did notice 'Idaho' working downtown the other evening though, but left well enough alone...
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: JWR on December 13, 2018, 09:58:52 PM
Benjo.....dozens?  You know dozens that have crashed and burned?  Wow where do you meet these guys, and hear about all the stories?  That is a crazy ratio....crazy.  I'm not doubting at all, I'm curious.

I think a guy has to get a grip on how much of what is driving him to have a relationship with these girls is sex, and what % is that they want someone to have coffee with in the morning, and companionship through life.  When you're horny, it's easy to confuse it for "wanting a life companion" to live with.
Bringing one of these girls up here for companionship obviously involves a huge amount of risk the way our terrible immigration system is set up.  Guys sort of know the risk, and won't risk it to be with an average looking girl.  I think guys think well if I have to go through all this trouble to get one up here, she better be super hot.

I wonder how many guys that brought girls up here and divorced actually go down, meet another and bring her up here?  It's hard to estimate how miserable the process is when it doesn't work out.
For guys that are willing to marry one of these girls with kids, and bring the family unit up here with all the risks and complications involved, I think there has to be some serious loneliness driving that move.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: mambocowboy on December 13, 2018, 10:50:02 PM
Mambo.....dozens?  You know dozens that have crashed and burned?  Wow where do you meet these guys, and hear about all the stories?  That is a crazy ratio....crazy.  I'm not doubting at all, I'm curious.





I think you confused me with someone else. I have met only one couple that crashed and never wrote anything about "dozens. "
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: benjio on December 13, 2018, 10:50:39 PM
Mambo.....dozens?  You know dozens that have crashed and burned?  Wow where do you meet these guys, and hear about all the stories?  That is a crazy ratio....crazy.  I'm not doubting at all, I'm curious.

I think you meant me, not Mambocowboy. First of all let me say I'm a people person. I will speak with anyone and I feel I have something to learn from everyone I speak to.

When I started dating  my first Barranquillera girlfriend after my first trip to Jamie's I would visit her about every 3-4 months for the better part of 2 years. Almost every time I returned, I used Jamie's lodging and I also used a couple of his translators until my conversational Spanish was half decent. Of course I could get hotel rooms in Barranquilla for much cheaper, but I liked his accommodations back when he had the house in Salgar. In addition to that house Jamie also kept an office/house in the city. So at any given time he could house up to 5 clients. And there were times when I've seen that many guys there at once. Inevitably, because what we chose to do was so rare and unique, I became good friends with a lot of these guys and kept in touch. Some married girls from Jamie's. Some married girls they met through other means. But most were unsuccessful. Jamie has told me that he has no real statistics on how many marriages actually last between couples that met at his agency. But from my personal experience I would say most fizzle out. This is not anyone's fault. I think a lot of it has to do with the reasons I listed in an earlier post. But also men tend to have a lot of unrealistic expectations when it comes to marrying foreign women. I know for a fact that if everything had worked out with my first girlfriend and I brought her to the states, we wouldn't have stayed married. I can look at that in retrospect now and be realistic about it because there's no longer emotion involved, I know a lot more about myself, about relationships and most importantly about Colombianas.

Another way I've met a lot of men is through my training to become an ESL teacher in Colombia and earning my CELTA. I met several Americans in Colombia while I worked there as an English teacher and those that brought women back to the states to marry them all eventually got divorces. That I can say for sure. None of them worked out.

Another way I've met a lot of gringos that married Colombianas was attending and participating in Houston's Colombia/Venezuela Festival which happens every July. It's a huge event that usually draws around 100K people. A lot of guys bring their new Colombiana wives out there to give them a taste of home. I can't tell you how many guys I meet there that tell me they brought their wives because they were extremely homesick and missing family. I've also been a vendor at that festival selling mochilas, so again...another way I've met a lot of guys whose wives want them to buy bags. A lot (not all) of the couples I've met out there aren't married anymore. For a variety of reasons obviously, but a lot of these guys keep in touch with me through social media.

I will say this. Most guys are willing to jump right back into that Colombiana pond regardless of how bad it went with their first marriages. The beauty and devotion of the women still exist and I think the guys feel a little better prepared having already been through that experience. Even after everything that went wrong with my first girlfriend I never gave up and I actually met and dated some awesome women because of it.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: JWR on December 13, 2018, 10:54:16 PM
Sorry Mambo.....You're right. 

I stayed in that house in Salgar for a month one time....very cool place.

Very interesting....my gut feeling was that the sucess # was very low, but when I lived in Colombia, I had very little contact with gringos, or ex pats.

I wonder how many guys have moved to Colombia, or live part time in Colombia, and enjoy themselves?  I've had this fantasy about living 6 months a year there in Cali, / Lago Calima.   Most of the time I lived in Colombia I was with my wife, so we lived a typical married lifestyle.   When I lived for 4 months in BQ, I wasn't quite used to being single again, so that took some of the fun out of it.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: mambocowboy on December 13, 2018, 11:11:37 PM
I think you meant me, not Mambocowboy. First of all let me say I'm a people person. I will speak with anyone and I feel I have something to learn from everyone I speak to.

When I started dating  my first Barranquillera girlfriend after my first trip to Jamie's I would visit her about every 3-4 months for the better part of 2 years. Almost every time I returned, I used Jamie's lodging and I also used a couple of his translators until my conversational Spanish was half decent. Of course I could get hotel rooms in Barranquilla for much cheaper, but I liked his accommodations back when he had the house in Salgar. In addition to that house Jamie also kept an office/house in the city. So at any given time he could house up to 5 clients. And there were times when I've seen that many guys there at once. Inevitably, because what we chose to do was so rare and unique, I became good friends with a lot of these guys and kept in touch. Some married girls from Jamie's. Some married girls they met through other means. But most were unsuccessful. Jamie has told me that he has no real statistics on how many marriages actually last between couples that met at his agency. But from my personal experience I would say most fizzle out. This is not anyone's fault. I think a lot of it has to do with the reasons I listed in an earlier post. But also men tend to have a lot of unrealistic expectations when it comes to marrying foreign women. I know for a fact that if everything had worked out with my first girlfriend and I brought her to the states, we wouldn't have stayed married. I can look at that in retrospect now and be realistic about it because there's no longer emotion involved, I know a lot more about myself, about relationships and most importantly about Colombianas.

Another way I've met a lot of men is through my training to become an ESL teacher in Colombia and earning my CELTA. I met several Americans in Colombia while I worked there as an English teacher and those that brought women back to the states to marry them all eventually got divorces. That I can say for sure. None of them worked out.

Another way I've met a lot of gringos that married Colombianas was attending and participating in Houston's Colombia/Venezuela Festival which happens every July. It's a huge event that usually draws around 100K people. A lot of guys bring their new Colombiana wives out there to give them a taste of home. I can't tell you how many guys I meet there that tell me they brought their wives because they were extremely homesick and missing family. I've also been a vendor at that festival selling mochilas, so again...another way I've met a lot of guys whose wives want them to buy bags. A lot (not all) of the couples I've met out there aren't married anymore. For a variety of reasons obviously, but a lot of these guys keep in touch with me through social media.

I will say this. Most guys are willing to jump right back into that Colombiana pond regardless of how bad it went with their first marriages. The beauty and devotion of the women still exist and I think the guys feel a little better prepared having already been through that experience. Even after everything that went wrong with my first girlfriend I never gave up and I actually met and dated some awesome women because of it.
[/quote
I actually know two failures lol...in both cases the wife did not show any interest in learning English. These guys enabled their wives by constantly speaking Spanish to them and funding frequent trips back to BAQ to "help" with the homesickness. Incidentally,  these women had no intention of having kids with the gringos. In one case the wife had two sons she brought over from a previous relationship....
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Wildstubby on December 14, 2018, 04:18:01 AM
jwr said:
Quote
I wonder how many guys that brought girls up here and divorced actually go down, meet another and bring her up here?  It's hard to estimate how miserable the process is when it doesn't work out.
For guys that are willing to marry one of these girls with kids, and bring the family unit up here with all the risks and complications involved, I think there has to be some serious loneliness driving that move.
I would think it would be somewhat difficult especially in this day and age. I'm going through the visa process now and they record all that stuff and I'm sure anything contrary on an application would be flagged since it is screened through Homeland Security first. But that's just me thinking.
Now, my novia isn't a model or wears a bikini. As a matter of fact, she is 10 years younger than me and I am 57, so you do the math. Personally I think she is smart and seems to mesh with me on all points. Like the previous poster referred to the fact about "wanting someone to drink coffee with you," becomes more into the equation. I had many failures in  Colombia as predicted, but always seemed to return with more of desire to find someone a little closer to my age than a model. I often heard echoing in my head that 'beauty is fleeting!'
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Elexpatriado on December 14, 2018, 04:30:57 AM
Benjo.....dozens?  You know dozens that have crashed and burned?  Wow where do you meet these guys, and hear about all the stories?  That is a crazy ratio....crazy.  I'm not doubting at all, I'm curious.

I think a guy has to get a grip on how much of what is driving him to have a relationship with these girls is sex, and what % is that they want someone to have coffee with in the morning, and companionship through life.  When you're horny, it's easy to confuse it for "wanting a life companion" to live with.
Bringing one of these girls up here for companionship obviously involves a huge amount of risk the way our terrible immigration system is set up.  Guys sort of know the risk, and won't risk it to be with an average looking girl.  I think guys think well if I have to go through all this trouble to get one up here, she better be super hot.

I wonder how many guys that brought girls up here and divorced actually go down, meet another and bring her up here?  It's hard to estimate how miserable the process is when it doesn't work out.
For guys that are willing to marry one of these girls with kids, and bring the family unit up here with all the risks and complications involved, I think there has to be some serious loneliness driving that move.


So happy I am living in Colombia ;D ;D
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: buenopues4 on December 14, 2018, 05:42:50 PM
I am probably the longest term ex pat continuous resident in Colombia on the forum. I moved to Cali in 2002 and have lived full time in Colombia ever since. I don't have a single regret except I'd like to walk in the snow once in a while. I have endless stories and have told some here. I feel like I've had two complete lives and am living full bore in the second. On my occasional visits to the states I don't bother to talk about Colombia to friends and aquaintences. It would be like trying to tell them what life is like on Mars.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Wildstubby on December 14, 2018, 07:57:42 PM
Whatever became of Bill on the other forum? He hasn't stuck his head up in a while. He's been down there a long time also!
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: benjio on December 14, 2018, 10:46:30 PM
I think (and I may be incorrect) that Mickey is the longest lasting expat in Colombia. He’s been in Medellin for decades.
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: Hector_Lavoe on December 15, 2018, 12:21:55 AM
I think (and I may be incorrect) that Mickey is the longest lasting expat in Colombia. He’s been in Medellin for decades.


I thought that was buenpais. I could be wrong but I seem to recall a post from Mickey a few years back saying that he didn't move full-time to Medellin until 2007 or so. But I could be way off......
Title: Re: Is this crazy?
Post by: buenopues4 on December 15, 2018, 06:32:20 AM
Yes I know expats who have been here much longer than I have but I was referring to those who post on this forum.