Imagine being a soccer star in Colombia

[mambocowboy]

So my brother in law shared a post about how Teo Gutierrez  the soccer  star for Junior still hangs out in his old neighborhood la Chinita in BAQ. I wonder how many people have their hands out and expect him to share his wealth?

[Hector_Lavoe]

I suppose it is better than being an average Joe (or "Jose").

Then there was Andres Escobar who got gunned down shortly after his "own goal" incident at the 1994 World Cup while Colombia was playing against the United States.

ESPN did a documentary on it in 2009/2010 called the "Two Escobars" but I assume you already know all this because I think you a lot more about soccer than I do.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Andr%C3%A9s_Escobar#Own_goal_incident_and_subsequent_murder

[mambocowboy]

I suppose it is better than being an average Joe (or "Jose").

Then there was Andres Escobar who got gunned down shortly after his "own goal" incident at the 1994 World Cup while Colombia was playing against the United States.

ESPN did a documentary on it in 2009/2010 called the "Two Escobars" but I assume you already know all this because I think you a lot more about soccer than I do.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Andr%C3%A9s_Escobar#Own_goal_incident_and_subsequent_murder

Saw that documentary. The cartels were literally running the professional league. They owned the teams!...

[benjio]

So my brother in law shared a post about how Teo Gutierrez  the soccer  star for Junior still hangs out in his old neighborhood la Chinita in BAQ. I wonder how many people have their hands out and expect him to share his wealth?

It’s not like that at all. When he’s there he’s with family and old friends. Outside of that it’s for an event and he’s picking up the bill for everyone to eat and drink so no, I don’t think many people bother him with requests for money. They all know who he is but it’s like a family in barrios like that. I’ve hung out in some of the worst neighborhoods in Quilla for years and may have gotten a request for money once or twice....and it’s never for very much. When people really care about you and consider you family they don’t put you in that position. Plus like Teo, once in a while I’ll buy a few cases of beer, a couple of bottles of Old Parr and a bunch of chicken for everyone and they’re more than satisfied. Keep in mind though that there are several households I can go to and people will cook their last grain of rice and feed it to me without asking for a single peso. And these people have NOTHING!!!

I worked in Colombia for extended periods of time with educated people from affluent families and when I brought my friends from the barrio around they’d always get uncomfortable. I got the impression that they assumed something would be stolen or the person(s) was using me. It wasn’t that way at all. Poor people in LA get a really bad rap but for the most part they are very good people.

[mambocowboy]

It’s not like that at all. When he’s there he’s with family and old friends. Outside of that it’s for an event and he’s picking up the bill for everyone to eat and drink so no, I don’t think many people bother him with requests for money. They all know who he is but it’s like a family in barrios like that. I’ve hung out in some of the worst neighborhoods in Quilla for years and may have gotten a request for money once or twice....and it’s never for very much. When people really care about you and consider you family they don’t put you in that position. Plus like Teo, once in a while I’ll buy a few cases of beer, a couple of bottles of Old Parr and a bunch of chicken for everyone and they’re more than satisfied. Keep in mind though that there are several households I can go to and people will cook their last grain of rice and feed it to me without asking for a single peso. And these people have NOTHING!!!

I worked in Colombia for extended periods of time with educated people from affluent families and when I brought my friends from the barrio around they’d always get uncomfortable. I got the impression that they assumed something would be stolen or the person(s) was using me. It wasn’t that way at all. Poor people in LA get a really bad rap but for the most part they are very good people.

Hmm. It has nothing to do with being a good or bad person, but since my wife started working she has plenty of people from her neighborhood,  including extended family. hitting her up for money...

[benjio]

Hmm. It has nothing to do with being a good or bad person, but since my wife started working she has plenty of people from her neighborhood,  including extended family. hitting her up for money...

Do you think he’d continue to spend time there if people were constantly pestering him for money? I don’t. I’ve never seen or met the guy over there but I’ve also heard he comes around often so there’s probably some truth to it.

And being a good or bad person wasn’t my point. It’s people making assumptions about other people because of their socio-economic status. I was trying to say not all poor people will ask you to borrow money because they assume you have it, just like not all of them will steal from you.

When you’re married all deals are off. At least from what I’ve seen. I think every guy on here that’s has a homegrown Latina wife goes through that. Marry them, marry the family. But most request I’ve gotten for loans or outright handouts came from people I hardly knew.

[mambocowboy]

Do you think he’d continue to spend time there if people were constantly pestering him for money? I don’t. I’ve never seen or met the guy over there but I’ve also heard he comes around often so there’s probably some truth to it.

And being a good or bad person wasn’t my point. It’s people making assumptions about other people because of their socio-economic status. I was trying to say not all poor people will ask you to borrow money because they assume you have it, just like not all of them will steal from you.

When you’re married all deals are off. At least from what I’ve seen. I think every guy on here that’s has a homegrown Latina wife goes through that. Marry them, marry the family. But most request I’ve gotten for loans or outright handouts came from people I hardly knew.

I can't imagine that with his wealth (especially compared to their poverty)he doesn't get hit up. Either that or he beats them to it with charitable acts. We're talking about people who at times can't put food on the table or put shoes on their kids' feet.Also, there are likely people in that neighborhood who justifiably feel they had a hand in his success. People who looked out for him and steered trouble away from him so he could make it to the top..

[benjio]

Meh...maybe you’re right. Who knows? In any event my guess is the answer is probably, usually no. The guy’s not THAT rich. I’m guessing a couple of million tops. He’d be broke in a couple of years if he tried to fulfill all those requests. That’s kind of another reason I don’t think he gets many of them though. You said it...someone with that level of wealth constantly telling poor people no. That type of behavior builds ton of resentment. And resentment in a desperate person can quickly turn into violence.

I think the charitable acts are a lot more likely. Or maybe how much time he spends there has been exaggerated and it’s actually only a couple of times a year. Maybe he’s taking care of so local goons so he doesn’t have to be bothered with it.

I own a very nice European luxury sedan and a pretty decent size house sitting on almost an acre. I used to post pictures of these things on social media not thinking about it. I’d say about 20% of my Facebook friends are from or live in Barranquilla. In the past I’d go to Colombia and I’m hanging out in barrios and people would tell me, “you’re rich! Look at your house! Look at your car!” And I’d try to explain that wasn’t the case, but that was there perception. Either way, almost never got request for money. And I know a soccer player’s fame may make things significantly different regardless of his wealth, but that hasn’t been my experience. Now the people I don’t know very well...they are RELENTLESS!!!

Needless to say those pictures are gone now.

[mambocowboy]

Meh...maybe you’re right. Who knows? In any event my guess is the answer is probably, usually no. The guy’s not THAT rich. I’m guessing a couple of million tops. He’d be broke in a couple of years if he tried to fulfill all those requests. That’s kind of another reason I don’t think he gets many of them though. You said it...someone with that level of wealth constantly telling poor people no. That type of behavior builds ton of resentment. And resentment in a desperate person can quickly turn into violence.

I think the charitable acts are a lot more likely. Or maybe how much time he spends there has been exaggerated and it’s actually only a couple of times a year. Maybe he’s taking care of so local goons so he doesn’t have to be bothered with it.

I own a very nice European luxury sedan and a pretty decent size house sitting on almost an acre. I used to post pictures of these things on social media not thinking about it. I’d say about 20% of my Facebook friends are from or live in Barranquilla. In the past I’d go to Colombia and I’m hanging out in barrios and people would tell me, “you’re rich! Look at your house! Look at your car!” And I’d try to explain that wasn’t the case, but that was there perception. Either way, almost never got request for money. And I know a soccer player’s fame may make things significantly different regardless of his wealth, but that hasn’t been my experience. Now the people I don’t know very well...they are RELENTLESS!!!

Needless to say those pictures are gone now.

He makes more in a week than most from his neighborhood make in a lifetime. If he has siblings and his parents have siblings, the number of people who can claim him as family is probably pretty large...

[Elexpatriado]

The top players  from the Once de Caldes, the mediocre team from Manizales make 20 million COP  plus a month. They all have hot wives. (My Salsa instructor in Manizales taught  them "Dance Arabe" I came in to the studio when the girls`dance class was ending).


of course this only lasts 10or 15 years max, so they have to put this money to good use and invest for the future one way or another

[utopiacowboy]

When you’re married all deals are off. At least from what I’ve seen. I think every guy on here that’s has a homegrown Latina wife goes through that. Marry them, marry the family. But most request I’ve gotten for loans or outright handouts came from people I hardly knew.

I have never given my wife's family so much as one thin dime. My wife makes her own money and what she does with it is her business but she likes to drive her BMW so I don't think she gives any of them much if anything. Most of them are well off. They are all going on a Mediterranean cruise this December.

[Elexpatriado]

I have never given my wife's family so much as one thin dime. My wife makes her own money and what she does with it is her business but she likes to drive her BMW so I don't think she gives any of them much if anything. Most of them are well off. They are all going on a Mediterranean cruise this December.

Dont "Loan" money to anyone in Colombia


En Colombia "un prestamo es un regalo"  everyone knows that.


People that need loans do not have the financial competence  to pay it back. Pretty basic stuff.


I am not talking about 5 mil cuz you are short on some taxi money either.

[robert angel]

I have never given my wife's family so much as one thin dime. My wife makes her own money and what she does with it is her business but she likes to drive her BMW so I don't think she gives any of them much if anything. Most of them are well off. They are all going on a Mediterranean cruise this December.

Probably 1st time I've said it, but this probably deserves it's own topic.


I think that while some people including myself, have previously said "Marry the wife, marry into the family" (financially) isn't the case, that with time it's almost inevitable.

[benjio]

Probably 1st time I've said it, but this probably deserves it's own topic.


I think that while some people including myself, have previously said "Marry the wife, marry into the family" (financially) isn't the case, that with time it's almost inevitable.

Good point. I mean seriously, you’re married to a foreign woman living with her in the U.S. and something seriously grave happens to one of her close family members? I mean like something where lives are at stake and you can fix it by tapping into your savings and wiring over some money. What man would choose living with a miserable wife knowing he had the money to solve the problem. I’m not talking about any out of this world figure. $5K or $10K to make the problem go away forever.

Hard for me to see a man telling a woman he loves, “Hey, everyone’s gotta go at some time.”

[Calipro]

Probably 1st time I've said it, but this probably deserves it's own topic.


I think that while some people including myself, have previously said "Marry the wife, marry into the family" (financially) isn't the case, that with time it's almost inevitable.

Its not inevitable I have never given any money to any of my Colombian wives families
And I dont know why I would sense none of them ever asked

[Hector_Lavoe]

Its not inevitable I have never given any money to any of my Colombian wives families
And I dont know why I would sense none of them ever asked

But how long was your longest marriage to a Colombiana?

[utopiacowboy]

I've been married 16 years so that's a long time without them getting anything out of me. OTOH it's not like they need it anyway.

[mambocowboy]

I've been married 16 years so that's a long time without them getting anything out of me. OTOH it's not like they need it anyway.

I think there are significant cultural differences between paisas vs cachacas vs costenas vs calenas...

[robert angel]

I've been married 16 years so that's a long time without them getting anything out of me. OTOH it's not like they need it anyway.

My wife pays her own way too. Most recently adding an upstairs with wind catching porch to our house back home & tiling downstairs floors----but there's more she does there and even more here---in a lot of ways with 'her' money 99%.


In the states, I cover the house deed (it's in my name) and most of the monthly big bills, freeing up her cash flow.


I think if it's HER work, her money from HER job and that she should have liberty with it, but that she should still help out with household and misc expenses. And she sure does.



I only opened my bank accounts to my her after we we're married 12 years. But before as now since the day she was USA work legal, she's had progressively better jobs. She doesn't ask for things, she even tries to talk me out of buying her new iPhones, iPads, clothing, perfume etc.


But before I finally decided to let my wife-- who helped to raise my 2 fine sons, 'in' on my money, she has always been generous with 'her' money--spoils me in fact. She still has her original savings/checking acct., but now it's a part of our 'all in one' monthly bank statement.


Had I not let her 'in' to my liquid assets that she never touches, in a divorce a lawyer surely would, if it came to that. But no real pressure, no sway needed--twas the right thing to do.


She always grabs the tab 4 meals out, has some household utilities drafted ea month, is too generous with me, inc gifts, traveling ---a lotta things. She wants to buy me a Rolex eventually. I keep telling her, "No, Honey--I already have a nice one." But....Good thing I don't talk about Patek Philippe or Audemars Piguet!


I never asked her before we co-mingled bank accounts then or now, but as if a religious confession, she volunteered  "Honey, over the years I spent $10,000 on my family"  She was mostly helping pay for her sibling's tuition and then with their degrees in their hands, getting them moved to good jobs in places like Japan, Dubai and Brazil--all over, away from their depressed economy. In short--her siblings (except for one who hasn't required it yet) each gets ONE 'leg up chance'. ONE shot from HER. (not me)


One of her bros worked for Hitachi in Japan, then decided to come home, get govt Teaching licensed. Now wanting to go back to Japan, it's 100% on him to pay. Sorry, he got his ONE chance. Done.


Like showing them how to fish rather than buying them fish every month.


But except for my bleeding heart's occasionally incurable generosity (For their huge Copra/rice/fruit plantation--I insisted sending them a good chainsaw), my wife has worked and paid for just about everything sent back home for a long, long  time, (since she got here} and I wasn't paying much attention. Still no worry for me overall.


She must be crazy, because she feels that because I don't have any problem with it, (after all, it's HER money) That I deserve most of the credit. Heck, I'll take it, LOL, Happy wife, happy life!!


Health care's a mess over there. If you're having a heart attack on the hospital steps, unless you brought a lot of cash with you, you're NOT getting in.


As her Mom gets older and is going on meds like blood pressure, cholesterol, blood sugar meds., I am glad my wife has that covered, but if they insanely fired her tomorrow, rather than the more likely her company keeping giving her 8.5% raises and $1000's in 'incentives' that she never expected, I'd cover my Mother-law's Rx bills, no problem.


When she hits 60, there's a govt. program, but still--if she died because we couldn't cough up $40=$50 a month for meds like that, my wife and hence my life, would be miserable.


My wife briefly used a credit card to cover part of the renovations/ additions to our home there (that unlike our main house, is in both our names) and alarmed, I wired $500 from one acct. into hers--a gift of sorts. Even got her a dollar store card. I told her:


"It's to help a little with the construction, to cover Mom's Dr. visit, bloodwork and Rx's. Oh and maybe she can get a few maasages and take the grandkids to a movie"
''Lpve Hubby'

Geeze, it was like Christmas in July and I was the star up top the tree. Holey moley, St. Rob, LOL


End all statement is I consider them family, love em and if I help out a bit, it's all good---but no lie, I'm glad I'm not on some 'glad hand' hook---not sending monthly money to so called  'family'--able bodied lazies, who can but will not work, while drinking beer and smoking cigarettes.


Not running no frickin gravy train, but good ole fashioned 'get er done' work, w/common sense, responsibility ethic over there and with a little heart is how we roll.....


OTH, In my 1st marriage to an orphan  from the same country, money was an evil, terrible problem, broke into 'his and hers' fights and paradoxically grew worse when we had more than enough.

[robert angel]

Its not inevitable I have never given any money to any of my Colombian wives families
And I dont know why I would sense none of them ever asked

I doubt ( or would like to) that if your wife's Mother  was very I'll and surgery and medicine necessary to keep her alive and out of pain--if it wasn't covered by insurance or her income, that they wouldn't have to ask-- that you'd help out some.

You see somebody in your family dying, you don't ask, you help, at least some.

When my father in law was hospitalized and eventually died, they were pretty much covered money wise, but not just me, but other members of my side of the family sent some money.

When category 5 Typhoon Pablo, bringing the worst death toll of any disaster in 2012 (sustained winds of 175 MPH)  made my wife's village ground zero, it destroyed almost all their farm and homes. Their land employs almost the entire village.

Nobody asked, but my family, especially my sisters who aren't filthy rich, sent support.

If I waited for people to ask me before I did the right thing, I'd  be one sorry ass person.

I think you and "not one thin dime" U.C., are portraying yourselves as a little tighter on the wallet than is the case.

[utopiacowboy]

I think you and "not one thin dime" U.C., are portraying yourselves as a little tighter on the wallet than is the case.

Actually I am generous with people who I think genuinely need help. I was visiting my daughter in Galveston and went out to eat with my grandson. We saw a homeless guy outside the restaurant looking for some dough to get something to eat. I stopped and called him over and took him inside and told him to order whatever he wanted. It took some doing to get him to order but he finally did. The interesting part is he (like many residents of Galveston) is black and so was the restaurant guy - they seemed awfully surprised that an old white man would take the time to help a black man.

[robert angel]

Actually I am generous with people who I think genuinely need help. I was visiting my daughter in Galveston and went out to eat with my grandson. We saw a homeless guy outside the restaurant looking for some dough to get something to eat. I stopped and called him over and took him inside and told him to order whatever he wanted. It took some doing to get him to order but he finally did. The interesting part is he (like many residents of Galveston) is black and so was the restaurant guy - they seemed awfully surprised that an old white man would take the time to help a black man.

You're a better man than me. I have been in most of the homeless shelters and a lot of genuine charity institutions.  Especially if you're able to stomach a little religion speech, there are usually beds, a hot meal, shower and laundry facilities available, but NOT 24X7.

And if you get a bed, you have to be up and out of there very early.

That said, almost all staff at everyone of those shelters will implore you NOT to give money to street beggars, explaining that 90%+ of $$$ you give them goes to drugs and alcohol.

In our city (as well as in lovely St. Augustine last week) most of the beggars laid out on the sidewalk had 2 or 3 drinks along side them (in our city, it's often alcoholic drinks) most smoking cigarettes, some with their dogs.

Many were in their twenties, looking quite able bodied, while up and down the street "Help Wanted" signs hung in almost every restaurant/shop window.

My wife's a soft touch--I sometimes say b4 we go into town or on vacation "let me stop at the bank and get a pack of 50 one$" so you can share --she just can't help herself sometimes.

That said, if the person is old and REALLY looks legit in needing a few bucks, I'll dish...

But sorta like you U.C., since I get on my wife about free loaders. if we see somebody outside a restaurant and I signal "no cash" we'll go in, eat and as we're leaving, my wife will look outside and if the pan handler's still outside, she'll order whatever we had, but "to go" and give it.

She's ordered stuff for folks looking down, trying to stay warm and dry while inside restaurants too.

Well, not exactly. for our meals we tip 20% and drink water. She orders  a sweet tea or soda pop for them, then will give it to them with niceness and dignity.

We go to church sometimes and in a quick conversation with the parish Priest ( a great guy) I explained my reluctance to give on the street, how it was hard to sort the truly needy people out.

I shoulda kept my mouth shut, because Father Gabe simply said:

Oh, I'll give them a $5 and let God sort it out"

My stock with my wife dropped 50% right then and there!!!