Excessive followers on Social Media?

[Awesome]

  Robert is sharing his point of view and advice on the subject.

Well whatever "subject" he's advising on, it's definitely not the subject I was talking about.  Just like I said when he was trying to argue with bcc earlier, he didn't seem to have the slightest clue of what bcc was even talking about.



[/size]

[/size] He's not arguing with you at all from how I see it.

You're right he's definitely not arguing with me, nor is he agreeing, nor is he even discussing the same subject.  Dude's lost way out in the forest somewhere with his comments.


I know what it is.  Ra has mentioned before that he doesn't even use any social media, and he's definitely proved that with his comments in this thread.  Lol!

[bcc_1_2]

We definitely live in a world that is heavily influenced by social media.  What worries me is I see a whole generation or two that put way too much importance on it.  When what they should be doing is working to improve the world around them instead of whats on the computer screen.

If you are going to date young(er) (either domestically or overseas) you are going to run into a lot of girls that like using social media to the point it is obsessive. Hopefully a compromise can be found on middle ground. It may very well just be an internet/online attention addiction and nothing more. But I didn't notice the OP saying she was spending so much time on social networking that it was negatively impacting the relationship.


So is it a time issue? Safety issue? Annoyance about perving guys issue?

[robert angel]

Well whatever "subject" he's advising on, it's definitely not the subject I was talking about.  Just like I said when he was trying to argue with bcc earlier, he didn't seem to have the slightest clue of what bcc was even talking about.



[/size]

You're right he's definitely not arguing with me, nor is he agreeing, nor is he even discussing the same subject.  Dude's lost way out in the forest somewhere with his comments.

I know what it is.  Ra has mentioned before that he doesn't even use any social media, and he's definitely proved that with his comments in this thread.  Lol!

Awesome not to dignify your comments about irrelevance--but it seems that while you're as so typical, accusing others--that you---the man of a thousand tales and not a single picture or person to substantiate a one of them--that once again you're all talk and tinder, and a spark flies and there you go again.

All I have to do is click on my facebook app right on my phone next to google--which I do more than you might think--and go between chuckles and disgust before quickly realizing what a waste it is.

Linkedin, whatsapp, pinterest, instagram, twitter, tumblr, all the way back to myspace and yahoo--you'd have to be one hell of a lonely recluse not to be quite aware of them if you have an active family, work in a large organization, read, breathe, listen and see, etc.

Just because I'm not 'on there' not 'into' or a 'member'--it doesn't mean I'm not well aware of what's all around me all the time.

I don't use crack, heroin or ecstasy/molly either. That doesn't mean I don't know a hell of a lot about them! I suspect you do too.

[robert angel]

Well whatever "subject" he's advising on, it's definitely not the subject I was talking about.  Just like I said when he was trying to argue with bcc earlier, he didn't seem to have the slightest clue of what bcc was even talking about.



[/size]

You're right he's definitely not arguing with me, nor is he agreeing, nor is he even discussing the same subject.  Dude's lost way out in the forest somewhere with his comments.

I know what it is.  Ra has mentioned before that he doesn't even use any social media, and he's definitely proved that with his comments in this thread.  Lol!

Awesome not to dignify your comments about irrelevance--but it seems that while you're as so typical, accusing others--that you---the man of a thousand tales and not a single picture or person to substantiate a one of them--that once again you're all talk and tinder, and a spark flies and there you go again.

All I have to do is click on my facebook app right on my phone next to google--which I do more than you might think--and go between chuckles and disgust before quickly realizing what a waste it is.

Linkedin, whatsapp, pinterest, instagram, twitter, tumblr, all the way back to myspace and yahoo--you'd have to be one hell of a lonely recluse not to be quite aware of them if you have an active family, work in a large organization, read, breathe, listen and see, etc.

Just because I'm not 'on there' not 'into' or a 'member'--it doesn't mean I'm not well aware of what's all around me all the time.

I don't use crack, heroin or ecstasy/molly either. That doesn't mean I don't know a hell of a lot about them! I suspect you do too.

[fathertime]

If I were single and looking I think I'd set up a Facebook acct with another name  with legit pics and biographical info. and use it to attempt to meet some ladies.  a very low response rate is probably the norm, unless you are extra special.  After meeting a person can always disclose their actual name.

Fathertime!

[Awesome]

Awesome not to dignify your comments about irrelevance--but it seems that while you're as so typical, accusing others--that you---the man of a thousand tales and not a single picture or person to substantiate a one of them--that once again you're all talk and tinder, and a spark flies and there you go again.

All I have to do is click on my facebook app right on my phone next to google--which I do more than you might think--and go between chuckles and disgust before quickly realizing what a waste it is.

Linkedin, whatsapp, pinterest, instagram, twitter, tumblr, all the way back to myspace and yahoo--you'd have to be one hell of a lonely recluse not to be quite aware of them if you have an active family, work in a large organization, read, breathe, listen and see, etc.

Just because I'm not 'on there' not 'into' or a 'member'--it doesn't mean I'm not well aware of what's all around me all the time.

I don't use crack, heroin or ecstasy/molly either. That doesn't mean I don't know a hell of a lot about them! I suspect you do too.

This is you ra, jaja!!

[michaelb]

Many times these girls who post all this stuff to see how many fans and likes they can accumulate shut all of that down the second they get into a serious relationship.  I've seen it happen a hundred times.

Hello? They're married. Isn't that a serious relationship?

[Awesome]

[/size]Many times these girls who post all this stuff to see how many fans and likes they can accumulate shut all of that down the second they get into a serious relationship.  I've seen it happen a hundred times.

Hello? They're married. Isn't that a serious relationship?

Who's married?  What are you talking about?  Who said anything about someone being married or not being married?

[michaelb]

Very first post in this thread:


My wife has about quarter of a million viewers of her page on one of these social media sites.

[Awesome]

Very first post in this thread:


My wife has about quarter of a million viewers of her page on one of these social media sites.

I wasn't referring specifically to vman's wife.  I was referring to girls in general who post photos in order to accumulate a bunch of followers.

[Gato4Astrid]

If I were single and looking I think I'd set up a Facebook acct with another name  with legit pics and biographical info. and use it to attempt to meet some ladies.  a very low response rate is probably the norm, unless you are extra special.  After meeting a person can always disclose their actual name.

Fathertime!

I did but closed that secondary accounts due to jealousy.   At the time I only had 7 ladies in that account, and a Peruvian chica who had more than 1,500 friends in her list had accused me of playing games.  There weren't much comments on my facebook wall compare to hers where men made sexual comments and she even clicked "like" on all of them

[Elexpatriado]

Thats quite funny..

I did but closed that secondary accounts due to jealousy.   At the time I only had 7 ladies in that account, and a Peruvian chica who had more than 1,500 friends in her list had accused me of playing games.  There weren't much comments on my facebook wall compare to hers where men made sexual comments and she even clicked "like" on all of them

[Awesome]

If I were single and looking I think I'd set up a Facebook acct with another name  with legit pics and biographical info. and use it to attempt to meet some ladies.  a very low response rate is probably the norm, unless you are extra special.  After meeting a person can always disclose their actual name.

Fathertime!

That sounds good in theory, but unless you're very careful about the way you set your privacy levels fb ends up causing more drama than it's worth.


When you start setting up fake profiles and try to do tricky stuff like that these girls always find out.  They know all the little tricks, because they're doing the same tricks themselves.

[Calipro]

If I were single and looking I think I'd set up a Facebook acct with another name  with legit pics and biographical info. and use it to attempt to meet some ladies.  a very low response rate is probably the norm, unless you are extra special.  After meeting a person can always disclose their actual name.

Fathertime!

I have found Facebook to be invaluable in Colombia.....just pick a nick name for yourself and go with that....women do it all the time.
You might be pleasantly surprised at how easy it is to make facebook friends in Colombia....it is just like meeting Colombianos in person.
Starting out is the tuff part....you need to start out with some women friends that you actually know or have met....just ask to add them when you meet them in person.


Once you have a group of women on your facebook .....you just start sending friend requests to nice looking women that have a friend in common with you....all the people that facebook suggests (people you may know) are friends of your friends.....so you can't go wrong there either.


The funny thing is that if you have a friend in common with them....colombianas will more likely than not friend you on facebook whether they have ever met you before or not. Of course they will friend you even if they don't have any intentions of going out with you also.....takes a little work to figure out who is in the game.....but well worth the effort.


A couple things to remember if you don't want things to get out of hand.....keep your friends list private (they will still be able to see mutual friends and no more)....don't let anyone post to your timeline or tag you in pictures without your consent. And if you find one you want to get serious with....turn off your facebook account immediately ......you can always turn it back on at a later date and start were you left off.

[V_Man]

HI guys,


Sorry I didn't reply earlier. Apart from being married, I'm running a business and so I'm not on here much any more.


Some people wanted some clarification.
It's not a dating site - obviously! I would definitely object to that, most strongly of course.
I'd prefer not to mention which social media - it would just feed the trolls and I don't see how it's relevant. It's not Facebook.


I went onto her page and checked the facts.
First, it seems I lied.
She doesn't have about quarter of a million viewers. Well not yet. She 'only' has 180,000.


She got this number in less than a year and it seems to keep growing. So my original estimate probably will be correct in a few months.


Secondly she only has 15 followers on there. She is not connecting with hundreds of thousands of people.
The 180k are people who have viewed her at least once. Not 180,000 hits every day. More like 1,000 per day.


On this page she re-posts stuff about God and cooking. Some re-posts about beauty and massaging techniques.
Not much of it is photos of her but we travel a lot so there are photos of her in different places.
The leading photo shows her with a deep cleavage from a night out of the town we had last year.


However for most personal stuff she seems to keep that to Facebook.
[/size]
She isn't posting much to attract attention anymore like a lot of young women do. Well not in my view.
After about a year of posting lots of photos of her and me in different places on Facebook in the last year+ she has decided it just makes people jealous so she is going off that and she told me she has locked Facebook down so not even all her family see photos there any more.


On this page with all the viewers - it is even less about her. It's mostly God and cooking here.


She isn't the least bit famous and neither am I.


She is not some celebrity chef. She is not some religious guru.


In other words, I know very well what people are looking at and it is not to see re-posted videos about God and cooking.


She is very open with me about how many viewers she has on there and she thinks it's ridiculous. I have told her repeatedly that I think it is obvious that people are coming to perv at her. I haven't objected to it - just pointed out what is obviously happening.


I liked the comment about be careful about raising a sensitive topic with a Latina who is likely to explode. Oh how true that is! However personally I think when you're married to a Latina you just have to be a little fearless and raise important issues anyway. I just didn't really think I should be too worried - but perhaps I am naive.


You have to remember that my wife gets noticed almost every time we go out so you have to put that in perspective with a lot of people looking at her on a innocent web page.


Also for anyone not used to a relationship with a latina, you have to realise that as a typical latina my wife is very proud of her husband and makes sure I am well presented. She is very proud to show pictures of me to people and tells me whenever someone says I'm handsome. I'm no expert but I've been repeatedly told this is typical Colombiana stuff. I mention it because some readers might not grasp the context. It's not like being in a relationship with a western woman.


I have her password and I could go view or edit page her page anytime if I wanted to - but frankly I'm just not that interested.


I hope that clarifies things for you - although probably it just throws up more questions.


I'm not sure what the consensus was. Perhaps you needed the clarifications above.

[bernard]

HI guys,


Sorry I didn't reply earlier. Apart from being married, I'm running a business and so I'm not on here much any more.


Some people wanted some clarification.
It's not a dating site - obviously! I would definitely object to that, most strongly of course.
I'd prefer not to mention which social media - it would just feed the trolls and I don't see how it's relevant. It's not Facebook.


I went onto her page and checked the facts.
First, it seems I lied.
She doesn't have about quarter of a million viewers. Well not yet. She 'only' has 180,000.


She got this number in less than a year and it seems to keep growing. So my original estimate probably will be correct in a few months.


Secondly she only has 15 followers on there. She is not connecting with hundreds of thousands of people.
The 180k are people who have viewed her at least once. Not 180,000 hits every day. More like 1,000 per day.


On this page she re-posts stuff about God and cooking. Some re-posts about beauty and massaging techniques.
Not much of it is photos of her but we travel a lot so there are photos of her in different places.
The leading photo shows her with a deep cleavage from a night out of the town we had last year.


However for most personal stuff she seems to keep that to Facebook.

She isn't posting much to attract attention anymore like a lot of young women do. Well not in my view.
After about a year of posting lots of photos of her and me in different places on Facebook in the last year+ she has decided it just makes people jealous so she is going off that and she told me she has locked Facebook down so not even all her family see photos there any more.


On this page with all the viewers - it is even less about her. It's mostly God and cooking here.


She isn't the least bit famous and neither am I.


She is not some celebrity chef. She is not some religious guru.


In other words, I know very well what people are looking at and it is not to see re-posted videos about God and cooking.


She is very open with me about how many viewers she has on there and she thinks it's ridiculous. I have told her repeatedly that I think it is obvious that people are coming to perv at her. I haven't objected to it - just pointed out what is obviously happening.


I liked the comment about be careful about raising a sensitive topic with a Latina who is likely to explode. Oh how true that is! However personally I think when you're married to a Latina you just have to be a little fearless and raise important issues anyway. I just didn't really think I should be too worried - but perhaps I am naive.


You have to remember that my wife gets noticed almost every time we go out so you have to put that in perspective with a lot of people looking at her on a innocent web page.


Also for anyone not used to a relationship with a latina, you have to realise that as a typical latina my wife is very proud of her husband and makes sure I am well presented. She is very proud to show pictures of me to people and tells me whenever someone says I'm handsome. I'm no expert but I've been repeatedly told this is typical Colombiana stuff. I mention it because some readers might not grasp the context. It's not like being in a relationship with a western woman.


I have her password and I could go view or edit page her page anytime if I wanted to - but frankly I'm just not that interested.


I hope that clarifies things for you - although probably it just throws up more questions. Rt


I'm not sure what the consensus was. Perhaps you needed the clarifications above.

She is not trying to attract attention as you assert, but her profile picture on this site is of her showing "deep cleavage"...ok, if you say so.

[fathertime]

That sounds good in theory, but unless you're very careful about the way you set your privacy levels fb ends up causing more drama than it's worth.


When you start setting up fake profiles and try to do tricky stuff like that these girls always find out.  They know all the little tricks, because they're doing the same tricks themselves.

I don't think having to do tricky stuff is necessary.  Merely using a different name isn't a big deal in my opinion.  A guy may want to separate his dating life from his personal life.    I do have a question though...what do you mean by privacy levels causing a problem? My impression is that a person could merely make up a separate email and facebook profile, and that can be separated from everything else....as a matter of fact I did that about 5 years ago for 'Fathertime', when I was sharing pictures, and it hasn't caused me a problem....that profile still exists. 

Fathertime!   

[fathertime]

I have found Facebook to be invaluable in Colombia.....just pick a nick name for yourself and go with that....women do it all the time.
You might be pleasantly surprised at how easy it is to make facebook friends in Colombia....it is just like meeting Colombianos in person.
Starting out is the tuff part....you need to start out with some women friends that you actually know or have met....just ask to add them when you meet them in person.


Once you have a group of women on your facebook .....you just start sending friend requests to nice looking women that have a friend in common with you....all the people that facebook suggests (people you may know) are friends of your friends.....so you can't go wrong there either.


The funny thing is that if you have a friend in common with them....colombianas will more likely than not friend you on facebook whether they have ever met you before or not. Of course they will friend you even if they don't have any intentions of going out with you also.....takes a little work to figure out who is in the game.....but well worth the effort.


A couple things to remember if you don't want things to get out of hand.....keep your friends list private (they will still be able to see mutual friends and no more)....don't let anyone post to your timeline or tag you in pictures without your consent. And if you find one you want to get serious with....turn off your facebook account immediately ......you can always turn it back on at a later date and start were you left off.

This all makes sense to me, and I don't think it is deceptive...my buddy has one for his Asian ladies, I think I'm one of his only 'real' friends and he seems to be meeting and communicating with a lot of ladies.  He has a separate profile for his family/long time friends etc etc.  My impression is he doesn't really want the family/friends to be seeing all the women he is communicating with or dating. 

Fathertime! 

[JamesDonut]

1,000 a day..that's it?

Some people wanted some clarification.
It's not a dating site - obviously! I would definitely object to that, most strongly of course.
I'd prefer not to mention which social media - it would just feed the trolls and I don't see how it's relevant. It's not Facebook.
.........................
In other words, I know very well what people are looking at and it is not to see re-posted videos about God and cooking.

After seeing this second post, I can safely say you are being a wee bit too paranoid.  How do you know they are just perving her?  If you are so sure that cleavage is driving traffic, do a little experiment.  Take those pictures off and see what happens.  Or at least take that picture off of the front page. 

It could simply be bots that are driving traffic too.  Some websites will do stuff like that to make it look like there is a lot of traffic. I bet that 1,000 is not the true number of unique and real page views.  It could be as small as 1/3 that.

The more I think about this, the more it seems like nothing to worry about.  Your wife has the right attitude about the whole thing as well.   And in the end, when did a little cleavage hurt anything?

[Awesome]

This all makes sense to me, and I don't think it is deceptive...my buddy has one for his Asian ladies, I think I'm one of his only 'real' friends and he seems to be meeting and communicating with a lot of ladies.  He has a separate profile for his family/long time friends etc etc.  My impression is he doesn't really want the family/friends to be seeing all the women he is communicating with or dating. 

Fathertime!

Trust me, I've been there, done that, and so have many of my buddies.


For example, you go out on wednesday night with maria.  Maria checks into the restaurant and the movie theatre.  Then all her little friends comment "oh you went out with ft, you guys are such a cute couple, bla bla bla".  Then you go out thursday night with belinda, and she takes a selfie of you two on the patio drinking margaritas and tags you when she uploads the pic to facebook.  All of this activity is visible to all of your "friends".  When these girls see what you were doing with other girls it's a recipe for disaster.  If you're dating a girl who actually gives a damn about you she's going to get upset when she sees all these other girls hanging out with you and commenting on your fb wall.




Now if you're like calipro, just trolling fb for prepagos then it's not a big deal because they understand the game and they're happy as long as they get their hourly rate he pays them to hang out with him.

[fathertime]

Trust me, I've been there, done that, and so have many of my buddies.


For example, you go out on wednesday night with maria.  Maria checks into the restaurant and the movie theatre.  Then all her little friends comment "oh you went out with ft, you guys are such a cute couple, bla bla bla".  Then you go out thursday night with belinda, and she takes a selfie of you two on the patio drinking margaritas and tags you when she uploads the pic to facebook.  All of this activity is visible to all of your "friends".  When these girls see what you were doing with other girls it's a recipe for disaster.  If you're dating a girl who actually gives a damn about you she's going to get upset when she sees all these other girls hanging out with you and commenting on your fb wall.

ah gotcha...that could be a legit concern...getting the security settings to the point where nobody can post/tag a picture of you without your approval....but even that doesn't stop that photo from being put on her page, which another lady might see if they are friends.  Avoiding photos altogether is one solution...but that is kinda draconian when you are out having fun with someone....   

I suppose if the man is a hot commodity but is upfront telling ladies that he is dating still, then the ladies just need to accept that, or move on...

Fathertime!   

[buencamino]

Some girls in Cali seem to ne replacing facebook with Whatsaap. If some one knew how to hack that they could make lots of money.

[Awesome]

ah gotcha...that could be a legit concern...getting the security settings to the point where nobody can post/tag a picture of you without your approval....but even that doesn't stop that photo from being put on her page, which another lady might see if they are friends.  Avoiding photos altogether is one solution...but that is kinda draconian when you are out having fun with someone....   

I suppose if the man is a hot commodity but is upfront telling ladies that he is dating still, then the ladies just need to accept that, or move on...

Fathertime!

And like you described your buddy earlier who started a different fb profile just to date his asian girls.  He's obviously hiding something from somebody.  Is your buddy dating these girls in real life or are they some girls who live way out in some other country somewhere?  In this scenario, yes you're right, it's probably best to have a fb especially dedicated to that.

[Calipro]

ah gotcha...that could be a legit concern...getting the security settings to the point where nobody can post/tag a picture of you without your approval....but even that doesn't stop that photo from being put on her page, which another lady might see if they are friends.  Avoiding photos altogether is one solution...but that is kinda draconian when you are out having fun with someone....   

I suppose if the man is a hot commodity but is upfront telling ladies that he is dating still, then the ladies just need to accept that, or move on...

Fathertime!

Telling ladies upfront that you are going out with other women will not get you anywhere....trust me.


75% of the ladies that you friend will just become gateways to the women you really want to get with....I wouldn't be jumping on dating any woman until I saw what her friends look like first and which ones were friending me on facebook.....then you just work your way down from  most attractive in each group of women with over lapping friends.


Never had any woman call me out on friending her friends unless I had at least kissed her and obviously if you have slept with them they will probably question your motives if you add her friends...unless you have met them personally through her....then it seems to be A OK for the most part.


Setting your facebook settings for maximum privacy is the easy part.....not posting anything on your time line that other women will "like" and thus become visible to the other women who look at your timeline and not liking pics of other women will be the hard part.


There are only a handful of women that I actually care about what they see at anyone time and I customize my albums so they only see the pics I want them to. Only close friends can see my pics and then I customize what each close friend can actually see.


Sounds a bit complicated but after you have been doing it a while it just becomes automatic.

[fathertime]

And like you described your buddy earlier who started a different fb profile just to date his asian girls.  He's obviously hiding something from somebody.  Is your buddy dating these girls in real life or are they some girls who live way out in some other country somewhere?  In this scenario, yes you're right, it's probably best to have a fb especially dedicated to that.

Yes you are correct, the friend is dating women in faraway Asian countries and he doesn't want to discuss it with his family or some of his friends.  I think that is reasonable enough...I don't view it as harmful to anyone...Depending on what a person wants the rest of his friends/family to know, it may be best to create a separate acct. 

Fathertime!