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Latin International Dating Forums => Latin -> General discussion => Topic started by: V_Man on March 26, 2015, 08:50:15 PM
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Hi guys,
My wife has about quarter of a million viewers of her page on one of these social media sites. As I understand it, she hasn't connected with all those people. They are looking. The stuff she writes about on there wouldn't interest anything like that number of people. It is obvious that people are coming just to look at the photos of her. No doubt it's mostly men having a perv but I suspect also some women as well. She hasn't mentioned to me, any inappropriate comments from men on there. I don't even know if they can comment there.
On another social media - facebook she did have some minor hassles with women. She actually switched all the photos on her facebook page to be private only and she mostly stopped posting photos there even for family. That was mostly due to jealous women, whom she prefers to avoid.
I am not a twitterface myself. I do use LinkedIn for business reasons. Some YouTube. But otherwise I use very little social media.
Also I should mention that I am the sort of guy that trusts my wife 100%. I also have zero tolerance for cheating. So my complete trust comes with it a completely back and white attitude to this aspect of life.
Getting back to the first social media page I mentioned....
I haven't been worried about her legion of admirers on this site. I just wonder if you guys think I am being naive. Should I be concerned? Should I be paying more attention to what goes on with my wife in social media?
Is this blind trust of mine a positive thing or a foolish thing?
I am interested in your thoughts - although I don't really see myself changing into a suspicious person any time soon.
Also note (in case you were wondering):
A. My wife has done nothing wrong and nothing for me to be suspicious about.
B. I haven't gone in there to check all the photos but what I have seen in these photos my wife is dressed as one would see her walking down the street. Being a latina that can be a little racy but she is not half naked or in her bedroom or anything like that. I don't see her posting anything too revealing or being disrespectful to me.
C. I view her legions of admirers as a compliment. It doesn't make me uncomfortable, because it's just online gorking. Well that's my attitude.
So do you think my relaxed attitude is OK or do you think over 200,000 admirers reaches a point that I should be investigating?
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Is it instagram?
If I were you I'd definitely have a problem with it, not because I'd think that it would lead to her cheating, but I just wouldn't want a bunch of strange men staring at photo after photo of my wife.
Women(and some men too) derive some sort of satisfaction from having hundreds, and thousands of online followers/admirers. I don't like that concept at all, especially for a married woman. If it were my wife I'd let her know that I don't like it at all and I'd appreciate if she closed the account. I wouldn't demand that she close it but I'd definitely let her know that I don't like it at all.
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Hi guys,
My wife has about quarter of a million viewers of her page on one of these social media sites. As I understand it, she hasn't connected with all those people. They are looking. The stuff she writes about on there wouldn't interest anything like that number of people. It is obvious that people are coming just to look at the photos of her. No doubt it's mostly men having a perv but I suspect also some women as well. She hasn't mentioned to me, any inappropriate comments from men on there. I don't even know if they can comment there.
On another social media - facebook she did have some minor hassles with women. She actually switched all the photos on her facebook page to be private only and she mostly stopped posting photos there even for family. That was mostly due to jealous women, whom she prefers to avoid.
I am not a twitterface myself. I do use LinkedIn for business reasons. Some YouTube. But otherwise I use very little social media.
Also I should mention that I am the sort of guy that trusts my wife 100%. I also have zero tolerance for cheating. So my complete trust comes with it a completely back and white attitude to this aspect of life.
Getting back to the first social media page I mentioned....
I haven't been worried about her legion of admirers on this site. I just wonder if you guys think I am being naive. Should I be concerned? Should I be paying more attention to what goes on with my wife in social media?
Is this blind trust of mine a positive thing or a foolish thing?
I am interested in your thoughts - although I don't really see myself changing into a suspicious person any time soon.
Also note (in case you were wondering):
A. My wife has done nothing wrong and nothing for me to be suspicious about.
B. I haven't gone in there to check all the photos but what I have seen in these photos my wife is dressed as one would see her walking down the street. Being a latina that can be a little racy but she is not half naked or in her bedroom or anything like that. I don't see her posting anything too revealing or being disrespectful to me.
C. I view her legions of admirers as a compliment. It doesn't make me uncomfortable, because it's just online gorking. Well that's my attitude.
So do you think my relaxed attitude is OK or do you think over 200,000 admirers reaches a point that I should be investigating?
Wow--"about a quarter million viewers" is a huge amount. Not sure what the construct of the social media site is or how involved--how widespread her "legion of admirers" are. You indicate she hasn't connected with all these people, so I guess she didn't have to accept an invitation and add each one.
But given those numbers, I think I, and like you seem to be--as well as most other guys would be, there's some concern. That's a LOT of attention. I'd think if you were a head of state, a senator or big celebrity, that might be expected, but a single, never mind a married individual--I don't think it's anywhere near the norm. Maybe in South America, but I'd think even there, that's more than usual.
My wife has facebook, I don't. I don't do any social network--again not facebook, twitter--none of that. I guess this site is the closest thing. On my wife's FB, it's quite clear --right up front that she's married, in fact she had a whole lot of attention there last night because it was her birthday and after the well wishing had piled up, she thanked them and said she was also especially thankful for her health, HUSBAND, etc., etc.
That said, she at times has expressed regret that FB can sort of 'take on a life of it's own' and she sometimes wishes she hadn't accepted members from work, because you accept one, then there's pressure to accept them all and she's very kind and considerate, not wanting to hurt the feelings, especially of people she sees every day.
My phone had FB already installed and defaults to my wife's site. When I click on it (rarely) it's mainly to link in to my son's sites to see what they're up to.
But I'll admit, on my wife's FB, she has a some pretty hot, albeit mostly married 'friends' and sometimes, with her right next to me, I'll ask "Who's that?" and she reply "Why? You think she's HOT?" (and I'll reply--"yes", lol...)
But I'd say I'm pretty relaxed too and part of it is I have seen a lot of guy 'friends of friends' apparently thinking my wife's pretty (I agree) wanting her to accept them as 'friends'. Guys from all over the world--Asian, white, black, Catholic, Jewish, Muslim... Unless there's a clear history--say they went to University together or work for the same company (just two appropriate examples) she doesn't add them.
Overall, her pictures, some of which include both of us, are modest, but on occasion, she's posted some of days we've been at the beach, but being modest, she doesn't leave stuff like that on very long.
I'd hope you have a presence on her site/s.
We're both pretty relaxed re. 'surveillance' --I'm not checking her phone or web surfing and it's pretty much the same on her end. I think she's got like 200 FB 'friends'. Considering she's worked at several big companies, I think that's manageable and I don't recall seeing any single guys w/o reason to be there--on some occasions, I have asked "Who's THAT?".
So no smoke, I don't expect fire. But if she had a quarter million people, yea, I'd take a closer look.
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My wife has about quarter of a million viewers of her page on one of these social media sites. As I understand it, she hasn't connected with all those people.
LOL...yeah...I think you are safe in suspecting she hasn't connected with 250,000 people!
Is this blind trust of mine a positive thing or a foolish thing?
I am interested in your thoughts - although I don't really see myself changing into a suspicious person any time soon.
you seem happy enough and don't have any problems with the wife.... so I wouldn't worry about it....my teenage daughters have 1000's of 'viewers/followers'....i don't think it means anything important..I'd chalk it up to just a female being a female
[/size]Fathertime!
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This kinda crap turns the brain to mush. People should get real pastimes and hobbies.
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I know ral hotwomen on face book and they only have a couple hundred friends.. I dont know what site she is on but the whole thing sounds stupid to me..
This kinda crap turns the brain to mush. People should get real pastimes and hobbies.
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V, overall I think you have the right attitude about this. No need to be jealous or suspicious at all. But I think this would be a good discussion to have with your wife. As that high number of visitors is a concern.
It is obvious that people are coming just to look at the photos of her. No doubt it's mostly men having a perv but I suspect also some women as well.
Don't be too sure about this. I've seen people write about stuff that I think is dreadful. While everyone else seems to be going gaga over it. The internet is a weird place. You may want to sign up for a media tracking service to find out what it is on her page that is getting the most reaction.
On another social media - facebook she did have some minor hassles with women. She actually switched all the photos on her facebook page to be private only and she mostly stopped posting photos there even for family. That was mostly due to jealous women, whom she prefers to avoid.
This is normal for any human being on the web. And sadly in this day and age not even worth mentioning as its become so common.
Also I should mention that I am the sort of guy that trusts my wife 100%. I also have zero tolerance for cheating. So my complete trust comes with it a completely back and white attitude to this aspect of life.
Getting back to the first social media page I mentioned....
I haven't been worried about her legion of admirers on this site. I just wonder if you guys think I am being naive. Should I be concerned? Should I be paying more attention to what goes on with my wife in social media?
Since you haven't shared the link. And not even told us what social media outlet it is (blog, instagram, twitter etc.), tells me you are a lot more insecure about it than you think. Which isn't necessarily a bad thing mind you. Purely out of safety or privacy concerns if nothing else.
The biggest problem I have with mainstream social media is the lack of anonymity. I don't like my pictures, comments etc. plastered all over for the masses to see. Although most people are innocuous, there are the few that have an interest to see what is going on. This could include nosy employers, co-workers, exes etc. It's ironic but usually the people you don't want checking things out, are the ones that mostly do.
There is only one reason I would do all the social media stuff. And that would be in the case it would help advance my career. Unless you are some type of media figure or celebrity, in most cases it doesn't help. Which brings me to my next point.
250,000 seems like a lot a views for a social media page. The next logical question would be, over how long a period of time? How many page views does she get monthly or daily? If she is getting this many views in a short time period, maybe cash in. She could start a blog or Youtube channel and earn a few extra dollars. It could be on any topic that interests her.
However as always, being a celebrity comes at a price. The crazies will start to come out and post crap. And she would need to be extra careful about what is posted to not give away location etc.
In any case she must be doing something online that people like. Hopefully its not boob or butt pictures. But it's a discussion worth having with your wife. Just to see what her thoughts are and where you want to take this venture. Or if it would be in her best interest to stop posting stuff.
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People who have instagram accounts are just attention whores, and are very insecure people. Their whole life surrounds taking selfies and other pictures, posting them and staying glued to their i-phones or computers to see how many "likes" and comments they get. Now, there are exeptions, but that's it in a nutshell.
I would excpect my wife to spend her time on something more constructive. Facebook is fine to keep in touch with friends and family. At one time i had thousands of facebook friends...i now have just a few hundred. A big waste of time and energy. I'm sure I could start an Instagram account tomorrow and develop alot of female followers, but their "likes" and comments in no way will make my day or make me feel better about myself. My ego is doing just fine without that, thank you very much. LOL
V-man, if she was my wife, I'd be having a long talk with her...
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just my opinion but instagram if for people who are looking for attention. and to some extent facebook also. i see many girls posting daily photos of themselves doing just about every stupid thing under the sun.
just for security, i would tell your wife to ditch the instagram and update her security setting on facebook to " only friends" and "not searchable". its amazing what a stalker or pervert can learn from facebook.
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V-Man,
I know a lot of very attractive women here in Latin America. A LOT!!! Most of them are women I work with. Your average office setting in Colombia, Brazil, Argentina, etc. doesn't include many unattractive or older women unless they are REALLY good at what they do or know someone very important. There are two types of girls I've run across. Those that eat up the attetion they get from social media; and the others that don't enjoy it at all. The latter will usually have their profiles so private you can't even find them if they don't want you to. The rest of them get off of social media completely after they realize how exposed they actually are.
My ex-girlfriend that stayed with me for a while here in Brazil felt she needed to share her entire life on Facebook. She had a complete fit when I didn't want to change my FB status to "In a relationship" and associate her name with it. I eventually cracked. She had me taking so many pictures of her here it got annoying. Everywhere we went she was either posing for me or snapping a selfie. Then directly up to Facebook in the next couple of minutes. I explained to her that whatever she puts on the internet, even if it's relatively innocent, will technically be there forever AND you've given anyone who has access to it the opportunity to manipulate it any way they see fit. She didn't think it was a big deal but I pick and choose my arguments. I figured this was a lesson she was going to have to learn the hard way. About 3 weeks after she got here her friend informed her that someone was using her pictures to create a fake profile. I've seen that before but when she showed me the page it blew my mind. There was a person that had actually went out of there way to create an entirely different identity using pictures from her profile. It's a great feeling when you can look at a woman dead in her eyes and you don't even have to say, "I told you so."
All women like attention. It just depends on how much of their self worth is based on the attention they get. I agree with Mudd and Bernard. I think you should suggest that your wife get rid of that profile and up the security on all the others. I can understand a woman in your wife's shoes. She's far from home and sites like Facebook allow her to maintain a connection with her old life. But take it from an IT guy....she needs to lock all of that stuff down or get rid of it. You'd be very surprised what people are doing with photos of beautiful women these days.
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The amount of hits isn't that shocking. American men spam the hell out of American women online. While these social sites have become ingrained in our culture, I do think having personal photos and info out there to the public (especially as a married woman) is not ideal. I'd just talk with her about increasing her privacy settings. If I'm not a good friend of hers or family, then I should not be able to stumble upon her bikini pictures or other personal identifying information.
Does my wife have some good looking photos online... yes. Are they available to the public... no.
You aren't nor should you try to cut out males that know her from her life, but you are trying to cut out stockers and the general public. And should the old boyfriend, college flame, or the zillion guys she friend zoned over the years see all this? Probably not.
Generally if you are traveling overseas to Latin America you are dating hot women and you have zero tolerance for the friend zone. But you are not the norm, and it is freakin crazy the amount of guys in a hot woman's friend zone... especially in the USA.
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The amount of hits isn't that shocking. American men spam the hell out of American women online. While these social sites have become ingrained in our culture, I do think having personal photos and info out there to the public (especially as a married woman) is not ideal. I'd just talk with her about increasing her privacy settings. If I'm not a good friend of hers or family, then I should not be able to stumble upon her bikini pictures or other personal identifying information.
Does my wife have some good looking photos online... yes. Are they available to the public... no.
You aren't nor should you try to cut out males that know her from her life, but you are trying to cut out stockers and the general public. And should the old boyfriend, college flame, or the zillion guys she friend zoned over the years see all this? Probably not.
Generally if you are traveling overseas to Latin America you are dating hot women and you have zero tolerance for the friend zone. But you are not the norm, and it is freakin crazy the amount of guys in a hot woman's friend zone... especially in the USA.
I'm not sure but I think instagram is set up to where it's meant to have "followers" who are just any random guys that you don't know. It's meant to show yourself off to the world. I would have a serious problem if my wife was showing herself off to 250k random perverts around the world.
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I'm not sure but I think instagram is set up to where it's meant to have "followers" who are just any random guys that you don't know. It's meant to show yourself off to the world. I would have a serious problem if my wife was showing herself off to 250k random perverts around the world.
I'm not going to make any assumptions as to what all she participates in. I have noticed that all the attention brings out some bad traits in gringas. If the privacy settings are not reasonable then by all means only keep active profiles on sites that have respectable privacy features available. I'm simply noting the difference between posting public versus keeping up with friends. I think it's wrong to keep your mate from socializing with friends. I find it acceptable to ask her not to post things to the general public. That's the line we walk here.
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I'm not going to make any assumptions as to what all she participates in. I have noticed that all the attention brings out some bad traits in gringas. If the privacy settings are not reasonable then by all means only keep active profiles on sites that have respectable privacy features available. I'm simply noting the difference between posting public versus keeping up with friends. I think it's wrong to keep your mate from socializing with friends. I find it acceptable to ask her not to post things to the general public. That's the line we walk here.
Yea well in this particular case we're talking about 250,000 people staring at her photos every day(and doing who knows what else). I highly doubt vman's wife has 250k "friends". And he already said it's not facebook, which means it's either instagram or a very similar website. Facebook is meant to socialize with friends and family, instagram and other sites are meant to show yourself off to the world.
I'm always very suspect of women who feel the need to impress people on the internet by looking sexy and being "admired". Vman, how old is your wife and how much do you REALLY know about her past history before the two of you met?
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Yea well in this particular case we're talking about 250,000 people staring at her photos every day(and doing who knows what else). I highly doubt vman's wife has 250k "friends". And he already said it's not facebook, which means it's either instagram or a very similar website. Facebook is meant to socialize with friends and family, instagram and other sites are meant to show yourself off to the world.
I'm always very suspect of women who feel the need to impress people on the internet by looking sexy and being "admired". Vman, how old is your wife and how much do you REALLY know about her past history before the two of you met?
Not every girl on instagram is crazy.And if you are suggesting guys jerk off to instagram photos. I mean I guess anything is possible, but there is also.... porn.
Let me say this. I'd rather the OP go to his wife and get her thoughts about it. I think that would be far more en-lighting if she didn't know his thoughts... and he just gathered hers to analyze
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t one time i had thousands of facebook friends...i now have just a few hundred. A big waste of time and energy. I'm sure I could start an Instagram account tomorrow and develop alot of female followers, but their "likes" and comments in no way will make my day or make me feel better about myself. My ego is doing just fine without that, thank you very much. LOL
Last time I checked we have 24 facebook friends in common.....I keep blocking them as I find them but it's like playing whack a mole.
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Not every girl on instagram is crazy.And if you are suggesting guys jerk off to instagram photos. I mean I guess anything is possible, but there is also.... porn.
Not every girl on instargram is crazy, but every girl who's feeding photo after photo to her loyal "followers" has some issues. Why are they so motivated to impress thousands of strangers? She's not getting paid for it.
Let me say this. I'd rather the OP go to his wife and get her thoughts about it. I think that would be far more en-lighting if she didn't know his thoughts... and he just gathered hers to analyze
This is easier said than done. Vman might be scared to confront her about it, you know, the whole latina temper tantrum and all. She might blow it totally out of proportion and they end up in a big fight. If he does decide to talk to her about it he better choose his words very carefully.
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Last time I checked we have 24 facebook friends in common.....I keep blocking them as I find them but it's like playing whack a mole.
Maybe you should stop checking....funny, I dont have any friends that show YOU AS a friend in common, (of course I know ur real name, lol) so obviously you use a fictional facebook name. Why is that? And of course that also means that your girlfriends are seeking me out. Hope that doesn't make you jealous. If it makes you feel better, send me a pm with your ficticious facebook name and I'll delete those girls. LMAO....gotta wonder what a guy has to hide to use a fictional facebook name...smh
Outt of curiosity, how often do you check up on my facebook page? Hell, be a man and just send me a friend request, I'll accept you...just don't drool over my pictures...LOL...your wierdness ceases to amaze me. I'll await ur request.
Also have no idea what your post has to do with this thread. Whats your point? At one time you had my phone number. If you still have it, be a man and give me a call (i dont have urs)...if not send me a pm and I'll give it to you, and we can discuss any issues yiu have with me and not distract from this forum.
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Maybe you should stop checking....funny, I dont have any friends that show YOU AS a friend in common, (of course I know ur real name, lol) so obviously you use a fictional facebook name. Why is that? And of course that also means that your girlfriends are seeking me out. Hope that doesn't make you jealous. If it makes you feel better, send me a pm with your ficticious facebook name and I'll delete those girls. LMAO....gotta wonder what a guy has to hide to use a fictional facebook name...smh
Outt of curiosity, how often do you check up on my facebook page? Hell, be a man and just send me a friend request, I'll accept you...just don't drool over my pictures...LOL...your wierdness ceases to amaze me. I'll await ur request.
Also have no idea what your post has to do with this thread. Whats your point? At one time you had my phone number. If you still have it, be a man and give me a call (i dont have urs)...if not send me a pm and I'll give it to you, and we can discuss any issues yiu have with me and not distract from this forum.
There is no way I'm going to send you my facebook name or friend you....that is just crazy. Besides all the mutual friends I could actually see...I already blocked. There are a few I guessed at and got but a couple still remain unfortunately.
There was one I had to block repeatedly.....she kept making new accounts and trying to friend me....that's when I decided to change my name again. jajaja
Really can't imagine what you do with that dike anyway. LOL!....I hope she is just hooking you up with her girlfriends.
I usually check your profile after I have added a number of new friends.....if the mutual friend tally goes up on your page I know I have a bad one in the bunch. LMFAO!
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I got a feeling they'll be warming up in the bullpen for extra innings before this is thread's done! ::)
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There is no way I'm going to send you my facebook name or friend you....that is just crazy.
You're right CP, what was I thinking? Why subject yourself to anything that would make you feel more insecure about yourself and make you hold me in even higher esteem? LMFAO also!!
Hey, the mods have me on "watch" so I am going to leave this be. Of course everything else in your post is true... ;)
Just remember when you see my profile picture with that million dollar (natural) smile, gorgeous head of hair and perfect nose, well...we all have to accept ourselves how God made us, and there are some things that even veneers and plastic surgery can't buy. O
keep on being the "Pro" that you are!
Sorry mods and V man if this thread got hijacked. I won't respond to anymore of CP's taunts.
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Yea well in this particular case we're talking about 250,000 people staring at her photos every day(and doing who knows what else).
Careful V-man didn't say 250k hits a day. He just said it has 250,000 hits. Over what time period we don't know. We would all know who she was if 250k hits a day were true. That many is considered Chocolate Rain type viral stuff.
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I can "thank" ClassMates dot com and all the spam it generated, for training me to be leery of "social media" as a genre.
I did finally make two fake FaceBook accounts, one was to keep an eye on a crazy untrustworthy in-law. And the other was to stay in touch with a couple of politically active people. I could delete both now ... but it's sometimes helpful to have a FaceBook account in order to follow a link. I've seen it mentioned that some people have fake accounts just to post on newspaper comment sections since many of them have been converting away from Disqus format.
Yeah I've looked up my old high school peers on FaceBook. And I think "Gawd! We're all getting old!!" Nah, I don't need to be friended and tagged by people I hardly knew in the first place. At my last 25 year reunion, I realized how hard it was to make conversation anyway. They were all basically strangers now.
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I can "thank" ClassMates dot com and all the spam it generated, for training me to be leery of "social media" as a genre.
I did finally make two fake FaceBook accounts, one was to keep an eye on a crazy untrustworthy in-law. And the other was to stay in touch with a couple of politically active people. I could delete both now ... but it's sometimes helpful to have a FaceBook account in order to follow a link. I've seen it mentioned that some people have fake accounts just to post on newspaper comment sections since many of them have been converting away from Disqus format.
Yeah I've looked up my old high school peers on FaceBook. And I think "Gawd! We're all getting old!!" Nah, I don't need to be friended and tagged by people I hardly knew in the first place. At my last 25 year reunion, I realized how hard it was to make conversation anyway. They were all basically strangers now.
It's actually quite the chuckle to run into old classmates/friends (especially gringas you knew/possible did stuff with) with your latina in tow. Actually worth quite the laugh because many times the gringas have let themselves go... so you don't recognize them off the bat, but they recognize you. And then you introduce your wife from Honduras, Colombia etc and they don't know wtf to think most of the time. I'm 31 and it's happened plenty of times... some girl comes up to you that looks like she's had one too many Natty lights and says hi I'm Brittany from school.
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Careful V-man didn't say 250k hits a day. He just said it has 250,000 hits. Over what time period we don't know. We would all know who she was if 250k hits a day were true. That many is considered Chocolate Rain type viral stuff.
Actually he said "250k viewers". I take that to mean "followers", or fans, or whatever they're called on instagram.
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Actually he said "250k viewers". I take that to mean "followers", or fans, or whatever they're called on instagram.
Ahh I see what you are saying. Still would like some clarification though. It is interesting.
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Ahh I see what you are saying. Still would like some clarification though. It is interesting.
I find it incredibly dull. Women seeking attention on social media and getting it (if they are hot enough) is rather common. While the few are out flying the globe dating a hottie... most are just fantasizing behind a computer screen. I'm unimpressed.
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I bet half of my "class mates" are pushing up daisies...
It's actually quite the chuckle to run into old classmates/friends (especially gringas you knew/possible did stuff with) with your latina in tow. Actually worth quite the laugh because many times the gringas have let themselves go... so you don't recognize them off the bat, but they recognize you. And then you introduce your wife from Honduras, Colombia etc and they don't know wtf to think most of the time. I'm 31 and it's happened plenty of times... some girl comes up to you that looks like she's had one too many Natty lights and says hi I'm Brittany from school.
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I find it incredibly dull. Women seeking attention on social media and getting it (if they are hot enough) is rather common. While the few are out flying the globe dating a hottie... most are just fantasizing behind a computer screen. I'm unimpressed.
It's interesting from a marketing, tech and internet point of view. That many followers or page hits (still no clarification) is a huge number. Not just anyone gets that much attention, even if they are trying.
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The amount of hits isn't that shocking.
So, if it's not 'shocking' -- hypothetically speaking, what sort of word or phrase would you use to describe the volume and your likely reaction if YOUR wife had a quarter million hits on a social site? Concerned? Complimented? A bit more than normal? A tad bit on the high side?
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So, if it's not 'shocking' -- hypothetically speaking, what sort of word or phrase would you use to describe the volume and your likely reaction if YOUR wife had a quarter million hits on a social site? Concerned? Complimented? A bit more than normal? A tad bit on the high side?
An average looking young gringa on a dating site gets pages and pages (in list form) of messages every day. Good looking women get pages and pages on sometimes an hourly basis as long as they regularly log in. If my wife was actively networking, meaning making content available to the public on various social platforms, I would expect the traffic and interest to be rather massive. I don't know the exact number of hits, views, fans, etc... but I'm sure it would be a big number.
I'm not sure the size or the exact number is relevant. If a girl is hot enough and posts enough sexy pics she'll get whatever internet traffic she is after.
I've explained my views on social networking. I think keeping up with people you actually know in real life is completely okay (regardless of gender). I think excessive public postings and photo posting to the public to be a bit out of bounds.
I would personally expect the security to be up on any social networking accounts, and if that is not possible to just skip that particular networking outlet. And there are plenty of women out there to tell me how sexist, misguided, and messed up my thoughts on the subject are I'm sure.
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It's interesting from a marketing, tech and internet point of view. That many followers or page hits (still no clarification) is a huge number. Not just anyone gets that much attention, even if they are trying.
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Yes I agree not everyone gets that attention... unless they are hot enough. If it was a pimple popping fatty... that'd be interesting.
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An average looking young gringa on a dating site gets pages and pages (in list form) of messages every day. Good looking women get pages and pages on sometimes an hourly basis as long as they regularly log in. If my wife was actively networking, meaning making content available to the public on various social platforms, I would expect the traffic and interest to be rather massive. I don't know the exact number of hits, views, fans, etc... but I'm sure it would be a big number.
I'm not sure the size or the exact number is relevant. If a girl is hot enough and posts enough sexy pics she'll get whatever internet traffic she is after.
I've explained my views on social networking. I think keeping up with people you actually know in real life is completely okay (regardless of gender). I think excessive public postings and photo posting to the public to be a bit out of bounds.
I would personally expect the security to be up on any social networking accounts, and if that is not possible to just skip that particular networking outlet. And there are plenty of women out there to tell me how sexist, misguided, and messed up my thoughts on the subject are I'm sure.
Maybe I missed something ---did V-Man indicate that the quarter million hits his wife was getting, apparently is still getting, were on a "dating site"? I think not. Not sure if you're back or forward pedaling here, but I'd think most normal fellows would be more inclined to be shocked, or at least ' taken aback' a good bit if their wife was attracting that kind of attention, having put herself out there. Perhaps your situation and viewpoint is quite different.
One thing for sure, on P-L , as well as with life in general, I've learned to never say: "I've seen it all", because when I do, life has a way of bitch slapping me with something even more bizarre!
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"dating site"?
To me social networking is social networking. At first it is shocking how many messages average looking gringas get online. They get spammed not just on dating sites but everywhere else too. And trust me it doesn't matter if they are married, in a relationship, or single. Hell plenty of married guys are trolling for sex online themselves.
It's only shocking at first. Then when you find out that average looking women get lots of attention... and hot ones get massive attention... then when you hear some hot girl has a ton of followers... you are not all that surprised.
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bcc, you are arguing just for the sake of arguing. If you don't care about social networking than why even post in this thread? Especially since you seem to know so much about it. Since you are posting, could you share some numbers and studies to back up what you are saying? Until then I'll take what is said with a grain of salt.
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Weird Double post.... Must have been one of my 250.001 followers.
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To me social networking is social networking. At first it is shocking how many messages average looking gringas get online. They get spammed not just on dating sites but everywhere else too. And trust me it doesn't matter if they are married, in a relationship, or single. Hell plenty of married guys are trolling for sex online themselves.
It's only shocking at first. Then when you find out that average looking women get lots of attention... and hot ones get massive attention... then when you hear some hot girl has a ton of followers... you are not all that surprised.
So it's all the same--"social networking?--having an active profile on a cupid site, LinkedIn, Instagram, adultfriendfinder, facebook, et al? And then, after a while--it's not "shocking" anymore? That seems to be saying 'Oh, it's OK after a while'.
You're making points with the conciseness and accuracy to be expected of a ten year old shooting balls of jello, using a sling shot.
But oh well, at least your wife isn't like all those others....
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How would she feel if you had 250,000 viewers instead of her? That's the real answer!
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How would she feel if you had 250,000 viewers instead of her? That's the real answer!
'What's good for the goose is good for the gander"
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How would she feel if you had 250,000 viewers instead of her? That's the real answer!
If you hook up with a chick that has 250,000 followers and get into her pants.....you are one lucky guy.....if you are married to her you are a poor soul.
+1 for staying single...jajaja
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So it's all the same--"social networking?-
To guys... I'd say yea. And since they are the one's adding, liking, and messaging...
And for anyone that thinks I'm arguing about something... keep in mind I think her profiles online should have the security raised.
And my understanding is that one person may have several different accounts on the same social media. Sometimes it is used to troll... other times maybe to try different approaches/stock women.
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So it's all the same--"social networking?--having an active profile on a cupid site, LinkedIn, Instagram, adultfriendfinder, facebook, et al? And then, after a while--it's not "shocking" anymore? That seems to be saying 'Oh, it's OK after a while'.
You're making points with the conciseness and accuracy to be expected of a ten year old shooting balls of jello, using a sling shot.
But oh well, at least your wife isn't like all those others....
To guys... I'd say yea. And since they are the one's adding, liking, and messaging...
And for anyone that thinks I'm arguing about something... keep in mind I think her profiles online should have the security raised.
And my understanding is that one person may have several different accounts on the same social media. Sometimes it is used to troll... other times maybe to try different approaches/stock women.
Apparently, you're beyond the realm and grasp of logic on this.
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Apparently, you're beyond the realm and grasp of logic on this.
Actually bcc is spot on with his assessment. 250k followers isn't extreme for a chick who's TRYING to get attention, not at all. It's pretty normal these days, girls upload sexy pictures of themselves just to see how many "followers", "fans", and "likes" they can accumulate.
The problem I see with it is if it's MY WIFE I wouldn't want 250k pervs looking at her in sexy clothes and bikinis or whatever. That's for goofy little attention starved girls, not mature level-headed, confident, GROWN WOMEN.
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Hi guys,
My wife has about quarter of a million viewers of her page on one of these social media sites.
Should I be concerned? Should I be paying more attention to what goes on with my wife in social media?
Look--I veer off topic as much as anybody, but as to 'spot on' I think most folks here know that this thread isn't about what men or little boys do, it's about somebody's WIFE.
Maybe you two guys would be cool, perhaps flattered in such a situation, but I daresay most guys here would not be.
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Look--I veer off topic as much as anybody, but as to 'spot on' I think most folks here know that this thread isn't about what men or little boys do, it's about somebody's WIFE.
Maybe you two guys would be cool, perhaps flattered in such a situation, but I daresay most guys here would not be.
If I wasn't clear before I would have a problem if my wife was seeking a bunch of attention online from strangers. Maybe it's because I'm younger and know guys that are using all sorts of media to keep track of women. To many guys on the prowl it is all the same. From okay cupid to fb to instagram to whatever... it's all just places with girls posting pics.
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Look--I veer off topic as much as anybody, but as to 'spot on' I think most folks here know that this thread isn't about what men or little boys do, it's about somebody's WIFE.
Maybe you two guys would be cool, perhaps flattered in such a situation, but I daresay most guys here would not be.
First off flattered isn't the first word that comes to mind. I would be a bit worried for her and my families safety. Second, I would want to know what SHE is doing to get all this attention. And also what she thinks about the whole incident. In other words the reason behind why she is behaving this way.
It may simply be that people like her posts. Some people have that talent to communicate and inspire people. If that's the case, more power to her. If she is doing all this to just get extra attention, I'd be a bit worried. But since we don't really know, this whole thread is speculation.
As far as whether guys are using their left hand or their right hand looking at my wife's pics, that's their business. The wife should have thought about that, and other privacy issues, before posting all those pictures online.
If I wasn't clear before I would have a problem if my wife was seeking a bunch of attention online from strangers. Maybe it's because I'm younger and know guys that are using all sorts of media to keep track of women. To many guys on the prowl it is all the same. From okay cupid to fb to instagram to whatever... it's all just places with girls posting pics.
Yep you hit the nail on the head there. However most guys "on the prowl" don't mean any harm. But you thrown in a couple of nut cases and you have problems. For the most part girls don't understand the danger they may put themselves in posting all those pics.
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Many times these girls who post all this stuff to see how many fans and likes they can accumulate shut all of that down the second they get into a serious relationship. I've seen it happen a hundred times.
Or another thing that happens is she'll start posting pictures together with her husband/boyfriend and stuff about how she's so in love with the perfect guy etc, etc, and the attention, fans, and "likes" naturally fall off dramatically.
You'd be surprised how many lonely losers out there will start to think in their mind that a chick they've never met is into them and is posting pictures just for him. Especially if she "likes" a comment he makes on one of her photos, or she says a simple "thank you" or something. He thinks oh my god she replied to me, she must want me, I knew we were meant to be together.
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Many times these girls who post all this stuff to see how many fans and likes they can accumulate shut all of that down the second they get into a serious relationship. I've seen it happen a hundred times.
Or another thing that happens is she'll start posting pictures together with her husband/boyfriend and stuff about how she's so in love with the perfect guy etc, etc, and the attention, fans, and "likes" naturally fall off dramatically.
You'd be surprised how many lonely losers out there will start to think in their mind that a chick they've never met is into them and is posting pictures just for him. Especially if she "likes" a comment he makes on one of her photos, or she says a simple "thank you" or something. He thinks oh my god she replied to me, she must want me, I knew we were meant to be together.
I think more than ever before, people can shut their feelings 'on and off', change their relationships, profiles--really their lives, sometimes in a rather casual way. People will wake up and realize "I don't love you anymore" not having taken much effort to try and make things work out before walking out. We live in a very disposable world.
I think part of it is undue influence from the media, where we see people get married and then divorced weeks or sometimes even just days later. Then we see shows and movies where the romance is so deep, the sex so hot, that one might be taken aback.
Yeah, there's a lot of delusional people in 'la la' land, thinking someone out of their league is obtainable, hopelessly misreading the situation.
But then we have people who have something real and great in their very hands and they dumbly fumble it away. Been there, done that--fortunately I've had the chance to start over with another great woman.
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I think more than ever before, people can shut their feelings 'on and off', change their relationships, profiles--really their lives, sometimes in a rather casual way. People will wake up and realize "I don't love you anymore" not having taken much effort to try and make things work out before walking out. We live in a very disposable world.
I think part of it is undue influence from the media, where we see people get married and then divorced weeks or sometimes even just days later. Then we see shows and movies where the romance is so deep, the sex so hot, that one might be taken aback.
Yeah, there's a lot of delusional people in 'la la' land, thinking someone out of their league is obtainable, hopelessly misreading the situation.
But then we have people who have something real and great in their very hands and they dumbly fumble it away. Been there, done that--fortunately I've had the chance to start over with another great woman.
Nothing you just said had anything at all to do with what you quoted me saying.
It's like when you were arguing earlier with bcc, you were WAAAY out in left field with your argument. I think you are just totally and completely clueless when it comes to discussing topics related to social media.
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Awesome, take a step back. Robert is sharing his point of view and advice on the subject. And I can see the connection between what you said and how he responded. He's not arguing with you at all from how I see it. You both made excellent points.
We definitely live in a world that is heavily influenced by social media. What worries me is I see a whole generation or two that put way too much importance on it. When what they should be doing is working to improve the world around them instead of whats on the computer screen.
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Robert is sharing his point of view and advice on the subject.
Well whatever "subject" he's advising on, it's definitely not the subject I was talking about. Just like I said when he was trying to argue with bcc earlier, he didn't seem to have the slightest clue of what bcc was even talking about.
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[/size] He's not arguing with you at all from how I see it.
You're right he's definitely not arguing with me, nor is he agreeing, nor is he even discussing the same subject. Dude's lost way out in the forest somewhere with his comments.
I know what it is. Ra has mentioned before that he doesn't even use any social media, and he's definitely proved that with his comments in this thread. Lol!
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We definitely live in a world that is heavily influenced by social media. What worries me is I see a whole generation or two that put way too much importance on it. When what they should be doing is working to improve the world around them instead of whats on the computer screen.
If you are going to date young(er) (either domestically or overseas) you are going to run into a lot of girls that like using social media to the point it is obsessive. Hopefully a compromise can be found on middle ground. It may very well just be an internet/online attention addiction and nothing more. But I didn't notice the OP saying she was spending so much time on social networking that it was negatively impacting the relationship.
So is it a time issue? Safety issue? Annoyance about perving guys issue?
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Well whatever "subject" he's advising on, it's definitely not the subject I was talking about. Just like I said when he was trying to argue with bcc earlier, he didn't seem to have the slightest clue of what bcc was even talking about.
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You're right he's definitely not arguing with me, nor is he agreeing, nor is he even discussing the same subject. Dude's lost way out in the forest somewhere with his comments.
I know what it is. Ra has mentioned before that he doesn't even use any social media, and he's definitely proved that with his comments in this thread. Lol!
Awesome not to dignify your comments about irrelevance--but it seems that while you're as so typical, accusing others--that you---the man of a thousand tales and not a single picture or person to substantiate a one of them--that once again you're all talk and tinder, and a spark flies and there you go again.
All I have to do is click on my facebook app right on my phone next to google--which I do more than you might think--and go between chuckles and disgust before quickly realizing what a waste it is.
Linkedin, whatsapp, pinterest, instagram, twitter, tumblr, all the way back to myspace and yahoo--you'd have to be one hell of a lonely recluse not to be quite aware of them if you have an active family, work in a large organization, read, breathe, listen and see, etc.
Just because I'm not 'on there' not 'into' or a 'member'--it doesn't mean I'm not well aware of what's all around me all the time.
I don't use crack, heroin or ecstasy/molly either. That doesn't mean I don't know a hell of a lot about them! I suspect you do too.
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Well whatever "subject" he's advising on, it's definitely not the subject I was talking about. Just like I said when he was trying to argue with bcc earlier, he didn't seem to have the slightest clue of what bcc was even talking about.
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You're right he's definitely not arguing with me, nor is he agreeing, nor is he even discussing the same subject. Dude's lost way out in the forest somewhere with his comments.
I know what it is. Ra has mentioned before that he doesn't even use any social media, and he's definitely proved that with his comments in this thread. Lol!
Awesome not to dignify your comments about irrelevance--but it seems that while you're as so typical, accusing others--that you---the man of a thousand tales and not a single picture or person to substantiate a one of them--that once again you're all talk and tinder, and a spark flies and there you go again.
All I have to do is click on my facebook app right on my phone next to google--which I do more than you might think--and go between chuckles and disgust before quickly realizing what a waste it is.
Linkedin, whatsapp, pinterest, instagram, twitter, tumblr, all the way back to myspace and yahoo--you'd have to be one hell of a lonely recluse not to be quite aware of them if you have an active family, work in a large organization, read, breathe, listen and see, etc.
Just because I'm not 'on there' not 'into' or a 'member'--it doesn't mean I'm not well aware of what's all around me all the time.
I don't use crack, heroin or ecstasy/molly either. That doesn't mean I don't know a hell of a lot about them! I suspect you do too.
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If I were single and looking I think I'd set up a Facebook acct with another name with legit pics and biographical info. and use it to attempt to meet some ladies. a very low response rate is probably the norm, unless you are extra special. After meeting a person can always disclose their actual name.
Fathertime!
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Awesome not to dignify your comments about irrelevance--but it seems that while you're as so typical, accusing others--that you---the man of a thousand tales and not a single picture or person to substantiate a one of them--that once again you're all talk and tinder, and a spark flies and there you go again.
All I have to do is click on my facebook app right on my phone next to google--which I do more than you might think--and go between chuckles and disgust before quickly realizing what a waste it is.
Linkedin, whatsapp, pinterest, instagram, twitter, tumblr, all the way back to myspace and yahoo--you'd have to be one hell of a lonely recluse not to be quite aware of them if you have an active family, work in a large organization, read, breathe, listen and see, etc.
Just because I'm not 'on there' not 'into' or a 'member'--it doesn't mean I'm not well aware of what's all around me all the time.
I don't use crack, heroin or ecstasy/molly either. That doesn't mean I don't know a hell of a lot about them! I suspect you do too.
This is you ra, jaja!!
(http://cdn.meme.am/instances/59678085.jpg)
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Many times these girls who post all this stuff to see how many fans and likes they can accumulate shut all of that down the second they get into a serious relationship. I've seen it happen a hundred times.
Hello? They're married. Isn't that a serious relationship?
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[/size]Many times these girls who post all this stuff to see how many fans and likes they can accumulate shut all of that down the second they get into a serious relationship. I've seen it happen a hundred times.
Hello? They're married. Isn't that a serious relationship?
Who's married? What are you talking about? Who said anything about someone being married or not being married?
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Very first post in this thread:
My wife has about quarter of a million viewers of her page on one of these social media sites.
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Very first post in this thread:
My wife has about quarter of a million viewers of her page on one of these social media sites.
I wasn't referring specifically to vman's wife. I was referring to girls in general who post photos in order to accumulate a bunch of followers.
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If I were single and looking I think I'd set up a Facebook acct with another name with legit pics and biographical info. and use it to attempt to meet some ladies. a very low response rate is probably the norm, unless you are extra special. After meeting a person can always disclose their actual name.
Fathertime!
I did but closed that secondary accounts due to jealousy. At the time I only had 7 ladies in that account, and a Peruvian chica who had more than 1,500 friends in her list had accused me of playing games. There weren't much comments on my facebook wall compare to hers where men made sexual comments and she even clicked "like" on all of them
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Thats quite funny..
I did but closed that secondary accounts due to jealousy. At the time I only had 7 ladies in that account, and a Peruvian chica who had more than 1,500 friends in her list had accused me of playing games. There weren't much comments on my facebook wall compare to hers where men made sexual comments and she even clicked "like" on all of them
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If I were single and looking I think I'd set up a Facebook acct with another name with legit pics and biographical info. and use it to attempt to meet some ladies. a very low response rate is probably the norm, unless you are extra special. After meeting a person can always disclose their actual name.
Fathertime!
That sounds good in theory, but unless you're very careful about the way you set your privacy levels fb ends up causing more drama than it's worth.
When you start setting up fake profiles and try to do tricky stuff like that these girls always find out. They know all the little tricks, because they're doing the same tricks themselves.
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If I were single and looking I think I'd set up a Facebook acct with another name with legit pics and biographical info. and use it to attempt to meet some ladies. a very low response rate is probably the norm, unless you are extra special. After meeting a person can always disclose their actual name.
Fathertime!
I have found Facebook to be invaluable in Colombia.....just pick a nick name for yourself and go with that....women do it all the time.
You might be pleasantly surprised at how easy it is to make facebook friends in Colombia....it is just like meeting Colombianos in person.
Starting out is the tuff part....you need to start out with some women friends that you actually know or have met....just ask to add them when you meet them in person.
Once you have a group of women on your facebook .....you just start sending friend requests to nice looking women that have a friend in common with you....all the people that facebook suggests (people you may know) are friends of your friends.....so you can't go wrong there either.
The funny thing is that if you have a friend in common with them....colombianas will more likely than not friend you on facebook whether they have ever met you before or not. Of course they will friend you even if they don't have any intentions of going out with you also.....takes a little work to figure out who is in the game.....but well worth the effort.
A couple things to remember if you don't want things to get out of hand.....keep your friends list private (they will still be able to see mutual friends and no more)....don't let anyone post to your timeline or tag you in pictures without your consent. And if you find one you want to get serious with....turn off your facebook account immediately ......you can always turn it back on at a later date and start were you left off.
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HI guys,
Sorry I didn't reply earlier. Apart from being married, I'm running a business and so I'm not on here much any more.
Some people wanted some clarification.
It's not a dating site - obviously! I would definitely object to that, most strongly of course.
I'd prefer not to mention which social media - it would just feed the trolls and I don't see how it's relevant. It's not Facebook.
I went onto her page and checked the facts.
First, it seems I lied.
She doesn't have about quarter of a million viewers. Well not yet. She 'only' has 180,000.
She got this number in less than a year and it seems to keep growing. So my original estimate probably will be correct in a few months.
Secondly she only has 15 followers on there. She is not connecting with hundreds of thousands of people.
The 180k are people who have viewed her at least once. Not 180,000 hits every day. More like 1,000 per day.
On this page she re-posts stuff about God and cooking. Some re-posts about beauty and massaging techniques.
Not much of it is photos of her but we travel a lot so there are photos of her in different places.
The leading photo shows her with a deep cleavage from a night out of the town we had last year.
However for most personal stuff she seems to keep that to Facebook.
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She isn't posting much to attract attention anymore like a lot of young women do. Well not in my view.
After about a year of posting lots of photos of her and me in different places on Facebook in the last year+ she has decided it just makes people jealous so she is going off that and she told me she has locked Facebook down so not even all her family see photos there any more.
On this page with all the viewers - it is even less about her. It's mostly God and cooking here.
She isn't the least bit famous and neither am I.
She is not some celebrity chef. She is not some religious guru.
In other words, I know very well what people are looking at and it is not to see re-posted videos about God and cooking.
She is very open with me about how many viewers she has on there and she thinks it's ridiculous. I have told her repeatedly that I think it is obvious that people are coming to perv at her. I haven't objected to it - just pointed out what is obviously happening.
I liked the comment about be careful about raising a sensitive topic with a Latina who is likely to explode. Oh how true that is! However personally I think when you're married to a Latina you just have to be a little fearless and raise important issues anyway. I just didn't really think I should be too worried - but perhaps I am naive.
You have to remember that my wife gets noticed almost every time we go out so you have to put that in perspective with a lot of people looking at her on a innocent web page.
Also for anyone not used to a relationship with a latina, you have to realise that as a typical latina my wife is very proud of her husband and makes sure I am well presented. She is very proud to show pictures of me to people and tells me whenever someone says I'm handsome. I'm no expert but I've been repeatedly told this is typical Colombiana stuff. I mention it because some readers might not grasp the context. It's not like being in a relationship with a western woman.
I have her password and I could go view or edit page her page anytime if I wanted to - but frankly I'm just not that interested.
I hope that clarifies things for you - although probably it just throws up more questions.
I'm not sure what the consensus was. Perhaps you needed the clarifications above.
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HI guys,
Sorry I didn't reply earlier. Apart from being married, I'm running a business and so I'm not on here much any more.
Some people wanted some clarification.
It's not a dating site - obviously! I would definitely object to that, most strongly of course.
I'd prefer not to mention which social media - it would just feed the trolls and I don't see how it's relevant. It's not Facebook.
I went onto her page and checked the facts.
First, it seems I lied.
She doesn't have about quarter of a million viewers. Well not yet. She 'only' has 180,000.
She got this number in less than a year and it seems to keep growing. So my original estimate probably will be correct in a few months.
Secondly she only has 15 followers on there. She is not connecting with hundreds of thousands of people.
The 180k are people who have viewed her at least once. Not 180,000 hits every day. More like 1,000 per day.
On this page she re-posts stuff about God and cooking. Some re-posts about beauty and massaging techniques.
Not much of it is photos of her but we travel a lot so there are photos of her in different places.
The leading photo shows her with a deep cleavage from a night out of the town we had last year.
However for most personal stuff she seems to keep that to Facebook.
She isn't posting much to attract attention anymore like a lot of young women do. Well not in my view.
After about a year of posting lots of photos of her and me in different places on Facebook in the last year+ she has decided it just makes people jealous so she is going off that and she told me she has locked Facebook down so not even all her family see photos there any more.
On this page with all the viewers - it is even less about her. It's mostly God and cooking here.
She isn't the least bit famous and neither am I.
She is not some celebrity chef. She is not some religious guru.
In other words, I know very well what people are looking at and it is not to see re-posted videos about God and cooking.
She is very open with me about how many viewers she has on there and she thinks it's ridiculous. I have told her repeatedly that I think it is obvious that people are coming to perv at her. I haven't objected to it - just pointed out what is obviously happening.
I liked the comment about be careful about raising a sensitive topic with a Latina who is likely to explode. Oh how true that is! However personally I think when you're married to a Latina you just have to be a little fearless and raise important issues anyway. I just didn't really think I should be too worried - but perhaps I am naive.
You have to remember that my wife gets noticed almost every time we go out so you have to put that in perspective with a lot of people looking at her on a innocent web page.
Also for anyone not used to a relationship with a latina, you have to realise that as a typical latina my wife is very proud of her husband and makes sure I am well presented. She is very proud to show pictures of me to people and tells me whenever someone says I'm handsome. I'm no expert but I've been repeatedly told this is typical Colombiana stuff. I mention it because some readers might not grasp the context. It's not like being in a relationship with a western woman.
I have her password and I could go view or edit page her page anytime if I wanted to - but frankly I'm just not that interested.
I hope that clarifies things for you - although probably it just throws up more questions. Rt
I'm not sure what the consensus was. Perhaps you needed the clarifications above.
She is not trying to attract attention as you assert, but her profile picture on this site is of her showing "deep cleavage"...ok, if you say so.
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That sounds good in theory, but unless you're very careful about the way you set your privacy levels fb ends up causing more drama than it's worth.
When you start setting up fake profiles and try to do tricky stuff like that these girls always find out. They know all the little tricks, because they're doing the same tricks themselves.
I don't think having to do tricky stuff is necessary. Merely using a different name isn't a big deal in my opinion. A guy may want to separate his dating life from his personal life. I do have a question though...what do you mean by privacy levels causing a problem? My impression is that a person could merely make up a separate email and facebook profile, and that can be separated from everything else....as a matter of fact I did that about 5 years ago for 'Fathertime', when I was sharing pictures, and it hasn't caused me a problem....that profile still exists.
Fathertime!
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I have found Facebook to be invaluable in Colombia.....just pick a nick name for yourself and go with that....women do it all the time.
You might be pleasantly surprised at how easy it is to make facebook friends in Colombia....it is just like meeting Colombianos in person.
Starting out is the tuff part....you need to start out with some women friends that you actually know or have met....just ask to add them when you meet them in person.
Once you have a group of women on your facebook .....you just start sending friend requests to nice looking women that have a friend in common with you....all the people that facebook suggests (people you may know) are friends of your friends.....so you can't go wrong there either.
The funny thing is that if you have a friend in common with them....colombianas will more likely than not friend you on facebook whether they have ever met you before or not. Of course they will friend you even if they don't have any intentions of going out with you also.....takes a little work to figure out who is in the game.....but well worth the effort.
A couple things to remember if you don't want things to get out of hand.....keep your friends list private (they will still be able to see mutual friends and no more)....don't let anyone post to your timeline or tag you in pictures without your consent. And if you find one you want to get serious with....turn off your facebook account immediately ......you can always turn it back on at a later date and start were you left off.
This all makes sense to me, and I don't think it is deceptive...my buddy has one for his Asian ladies, I think I'm one of his only 'real' friends and he seems to be meeting and communicating with a lot of ladies. He has a separate profile for his family/long time friends etc etc. My impression is he doesn't really want the family/friends to be seeing all the women he is communicating with or dating.
Fathertime!
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1,000 a day..that's it?
Some people wanted some clarification.
It's not a dating site - obviously! I would definitely object to that, most strongly of course.
I'd prefer not to mention which social media - it would just feed the trolls and I don't see how it's relevant. It's not Facebook.
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In other words, I know very well what people are looking at and it is not to see re-posted videos about God and cooking.
After seeing this second post, I can safely say you are being a wee bit too paranoid. How do you know they are just perving her? If you are so sure that cleavage is driving traffic, do a little experiment. Take those pictures off and see what happens. Or at least take that picture off of the front page.
It could simply be bots that are driving traffic too. Some websites will do stuff like that to make it look like there is a lot of traffic. I bet that 1,000 is not the true number of unique and real page views. It could be as small as 1/3 that.
The more I think about this, the more it seems like nothing to worry about. Your wife has the right attitude about the whole thing as well. And in the end, when did a little cleavage hurt anything?
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This all makes sense to me, and I don't think it is deceptive...my buddy has one for his Asian ladies, I think I'm one of his only 'real' friends and he seems to be meeting and communicating with a lot of ladies. He has a separate profile for his family/long time friends etc etc. My impression is he doesn't really want the family/friends to be seeing all the women he is communicating with or dating.
Fathertime!
Trust me, I've been there, done that, and so have many of my buddies.
For example, you go out on wednesday night with maria. Maria checks into the restaurant and the movie theatre. Then all her little friends comment "oh you went out with ft, you guys are such a cute couple, bla bla bla". Then you go out thursday night with belinda, and she takes a selfie of you two on the patio drinking margaritas and tags you when she uploads the pic to facebook. All of this activity is visible to all of your "friends". When these girls see what you were doing with other girls it's a recipe for disaster. If you're dating a girl who actually gives a damn about you she's going to get upset when she sees all these other girls hanging out with you and commenting on your fb wall.
Now if you're like calipro, just trolling fb for prepagos then it's not a big deal because they understand the game and they're happy as long as they get their hourly rate he pays them to hang out with him.
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Trust me, I've been there, done that, and so have many of my buddies.
For example, you go out on wednesday night with maria. Maria checks into the restaurant and the movie theatre. Then all her little friends comment "oh you went out with ft, you guys are such a cute couple, bla bla bla". Then you go out thursday night with belinda, and she takes a selfie of you two on the patio drinking margaritas and tags you when she uploads the pic to facebook. All of this activity is visible to all of your "friends". When these girls see what you were doing with other girls it's a recipe for disaster. If you're dating a girl who actually gives a damn about you she's going to get upset when she sees all these other girls hanging out with you and commenting on your fb wall.
ah gotcha...that could be a legit concern...getting the security settings to the point where nobody can post/tag a picture of you without your approval....but even that doesn't stop that photo from being put on her page, which another lady might see if they are friends. Avoiding photos altogether is one solution...but that is kinda draconian when you are out having fun with someone....
I suppose if the man is a hot commodity but is upfront telling ladies that he is dating still, then the ladies just need to accept that, or move on...
Fathertime!
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Some girls in Cali seem to ne replacing facebook with Whatsaap. If some one knew how to hack that they could make lots of money.
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ah gotcha...that could be a legit concern...getting the security settings to the point where nobody can post/tag a picture of you without your approval....but even that doesn't stop that photo from being put on her page, which another lady might see if they are friends. Avoiding photos altogether is one solution...but that is kinda draconian when you are out having fun with someone....
I suppose if the man is a hot commodity but is upfront telling ladies that he is dating still, then the ladies just need to accept that, or move on...
Fathertime!
And like you described your buddy earlier who started a different fb profile just to date his asian girls. He's obviously hiding something from somebody. Is your buddy dating these girls in real life or are they some girls who live way out in some other country somewhere? In this scenario, yes you're right, it's probably best to have a fb especially dedicated to that.
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ah gotcha...that could be a legit concern...getting the security settings to the point where nobody can post/tag a picture of you without your approval....but even that doesn't stop that photo from being put on her page, which another lady might see if they are friends. Avoiding photos altogether is one solution...but that is kinda draconian when you are out having fun with someone....
I suppose if the man is a hot commodity but is upfront telling ladies that he is dating still, then the ladies just need to accept that, or move on...
Fathertime!
Telling ladies upfront that you are going out with other women will not get you anywhere....trust me.
75% of the ladies that you friend will just become gateways to the women you really want to get with....I wouldn't be jumping on dating any woman until I saw what her friends look like first and which ones were friending me on facebook.....then you just work your way down from most attractive in each group of women with over lapping friends.
Never had any woman call me out on friending her friends unless I had at least kissed her and obviously if you have slept with them they will probably question your motives if you add her friends...unless you have met them personally through her....then it seems to be A OK for the most part.
Setting your facebook settings for maximum privacy is the easy part.....not posting anything on your time line that other women will "like" and thus become visible to the other women who look at your timeline and not liking pics of other women will be the hard part.
There are only a handful of women that I actually care about what they see at anyone time and I customize my albums so they only see the pics I want them to. Only close friends can see my pics and then I customize what each close friend can actually see.
Sounds a bit complicated but after you have been doing it a while it just becomes automatic.
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And like you described your buddy earlier who started a different fb profile just to date his asian girls. He's obviously hiding something from somebody. Is your buddy dating these girls in real life or are they some girls who live way out in some other country somewhere? In this scenario, yes you're right, it's probably best to have a fb especially dedicated to that.
Yes you are correct, the friend is dating women in faraway Asian countries and he doesn't want to discuss it with his family or some of his friends. I think that is reasonable enough...I don't view it as harmful to anyone...Depending on what a person wants the rest of his friends/family to know, it may be best to create a separate acct.
Fathertime!
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Telling ladies upfront that you are going out with other women will not get you anywhere....trust me.
75% of the ladies that you friend will just become gateways to the women you really want to get with....I wouldn't be jumping on dating any woman until I saw what her friends look like first and which ones were friending me on facebook.....then you just work your way down from most attractive in each group of women with over lapping friends.
Never had any woman call me out on friending her friends unless I had at least kissed her and obviously if you have slept with them they will probably question your motives if you add her friends...unless you have met them personally through her....then it seems to be A OK for the most part.
Setting your facebook settings for maximum privacy is the easy part.....not posting anything on your time line that other women will "like" and thus become visible to the other women who look at your timeline and not liking pics of other women will be the hard part.
There are only a handful of women that I actually care about what they see at anyone time and I customize my albums so they only see the pics I want them to. Only close friends can see my pics and then I customize what each close friend can actually see.
Sounds a bit complicated but after you have been doing it a while it just becomes automatic.
Ha! Those are some serious finer points of Facebook.
Interesting..so it has proven to be unwise mentioning you are dating other women...I can see this...but what do you say if a woman asks? If it were me, I think I would say something like "Yes I'm seeing other ladies, but I'd like to find 1 lady that I connect with well enough to marry/become exclusive with"...women shouldn't be offended by that I wouldn't think.
Fathertime!
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Ha! Those are some serious finer points of Facebook.
Interesting..so it has proven to be unwise mentioning you are dating other women...I can see this...but what do you say if a woman asks?
Fathertime!
According to my ex.....colombianos lie so as not to offend or hurt peoples feelings....so in keeping with the Colombian cultural traditions....you would lie and say you aren't dating anyone else.....if she sees a pic of you with someone else or someone tells her they saw you with someone else you just say she is a friend....if you where colombian you wouild say that is my prima.....just like they do. jajaja
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Ha! Those are some serious finer points of Facebook.
Interesting..so it has proven to be unwise mentioning you are dating other women...I can see this...but what do you say if a woman asks? If it were me, I think I would say something like "Yes I'm seeing other ladies, but I'd like to find 1 lady that I connect with well enough to marry/become exclusive with"...women shouldn't be offended by that I wouldn't think.
Fathertime!
There's nothing wrong with telling a woman that, if it's actually the truth. But if you are going to tell her that you better be good at explaining why she has no reason to be jealous or offended. If she's halfway intelligent she'll appreciate your honesty in the long run.
I'm sure you know calipro well enough by now to know that if he told a woman that, he'd be lying through his teeth.
So in conclusion, if you're going to lie, cp's lie is a better more effective strategy.
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According to my ex.....colombianos lie so as not to offend or hurt peoples feelings....so in keeping with the Colombian cultural traditions....you would lie and say you aren't dating anyone else.....if she sees a pic of you with someone else or someone tells her they saw you with someone else you just say she is a friend....if you where colombian you wouild say that is my prima.....just like they do. jajaja
There are reasons they lie so much in Colombia. Excessive honesty can backfire in the form of heavy duty drama and hurt feelings and long term resentment with Colombianas. Yet another way they differ from gringas...
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okay so around 1000 hits a day... that's really not shocking for a really good looking woman with low privacy settings online. And she's posting about jesus and cooking.
As for what cali is saying about FB... he's 100% on. You totally talk to women you don't know... just to get to the even hotter women you don't know... just to ask them out... and if anyone questions you about it... you are just making friends. And it's true. Especially if you haven't made out with her or gotten it on... in Colombia that means just friends.
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okay so around 1000 hits a day... that's really not shocking for a really good looking woman with low privacy settings online. And she's posting about jesus and cooking.
As for what cali is saying about FB... he's 100% on. You totally talk to women you don't know... just to get to the even hotter women you don't know... just to ask them out... and if anyone questions you about it... you are just making friends. And it's true. Especially if you haven't made out with her or gotten it on... in Colombia that means just friends.
I never really go friend stalking....I don't have the patience. Even the moderately attractive girls have 2000+ friends. One thing I did use to do while single and living in Colombia was looking at all the pictures of the girls I had already met. When I figured out a girl had a ton of hot girlfriends I'd just wait around for that event notifications saying, "So and so will be at Disco So and So on this night." That's when me and my buddies would "coincidently" show up in full force. Definitely worked out lovely quite a few times. Guess that's the same thing though. I bet you guys are beginning to see how I ran through $30K in less than a year down there. LOL!
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I never really go friend stalking....I don't have the patience. Even the moderately attractive girls have 2000+ friends. One thing I did use to do while single and living in Colombia was looking at all the pictures of the girls I had already met. When I figured out a girl had a ton of hot girlfriends I'd just wait around for that event notifications saying, "So and so will be at Disco So and So on this night." That's when me and my buddies would "coincidently" show up in full force. Definitely worked out lovely quite a few times. Guess that's the same thing though. I bet you guys are beginning to see how I ran through $30K in less than a year down there. LOL!
One of our last nights in Bogota this girl took us out to a local bar. A lot of her chica friends where there including a couple of guys. The Colombiano in a relationship was cool with it and tried his English out. The other preppy Colombiano thought he was going to get plenty of attention that night... and got ignored. So he was not our biggest fan. But this chica played it coy when she introduced her "friend" and didn't really indicate a romantic interest in him. Well then her friends are trying to figure out if this young gringo is available... and then the chica is like wtf did I just do. It's amazing how dense a move that was, but it literally opened a bar full of chicas to him. And I said to go for it, don't be shy, because she did this to herself.
Anyways I don't see fault in this method of social climbing. It works on FB, but it also just works in life. If you aren't that serious with a chica you can add other girls while you are out as your "friend". Guys do run the risk of ruffling some feathers, but one thing I do notice is that not everyone is BFFs. So you aren't going to get with someone's best friend. But lot's of time just an acquaintance isn't too worried about offending. It's simple math... a opportunity to go out with a young gringo, or not pissing off a chica I see out once in awhile. Hmmmm.
From our perspective I think it is okay to run the risk of offending and hurting feelings to social climb.
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if she sees a pic of you with someone else or someone tells her they saw you with someone else you just say she is a friend....
this part isn't actually a lie, I mean the lady can also be a friend...of course it may not be the entire truth either...but casual dates shouldn't get all up into a man's business anyway IMO...obviously after a spell, if the man is seeing the women regularly than maybe these types of questions, with follow-ups are ok.....
Fathertime!
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There's nothing wrong with telling a woman that, if it's actually the truth. But if you are going to tell her that you better be good at explaining why she has no reason to be jealous or offended. If she's halfway intelligent she'll appreciate your honesty in the long run.
I'm sure you know calipro well enough by now to know that if he told a woman that, he'd be lying through his teeth.
So in conclusion, if you're going to lie, cp's lie is a better more effective strategy.
That is a good point...the line I proposed is best used if it is the truth.....and the reality may be that many men aren't really looking for a 'one and only'...and who's to blame them? They are in the land of milk and honey and nobody says anybody has to be married or even have an exclusive girl friend. It really depends on what type of lifestyle a man wants to lead.
Fathertime!
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FT just curious, Do you have a vicarious interest in this topic or are you thinking of getting back in the game?
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FT just curious, Do you have a vicarious interest in this topic or are you thinking of getting back in the game?
absolutely NO interest aside from discussion!
Fathertime!
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I wouldn't recommend Calipro's approach to facebook if one is looking for a "normal decent girl". A normal decent girl is going to be very suspicious of a man who doesn't allow any "likes" on his pictures, who never "likes" her pictures, who doesn't wish her a happy birthday on her mural, who never makes sweet comments about one of her pics. Also she will be very suspicious that it is a fake profile, especially if there isn't a nice profile pic of you. She would want to see pictures of you with your family and friends, showing that you are real. Also when she googles your "made up name" and finds nothing, she will be very suspicious. If you are using a fake name she will more than likely think that you are married, or have something serious to hide. Just keep it real and be yourself. I agree about the privacy settings about friends, and not letting people tag you or post on your timeline.
Don't fret over the fact that you have a lot of women making comments on your pictures, giving you compliments and giving you "likes" yes, the other women will get a little jealous, but that's a good thing. She sees you are a desirable man in the eyes of other women.
I think Calipro's approach can work well for his "target market", but for guys seeking a serious relationship with a normal decent girl, his approach will backfire and raise a lot of red flags.
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FT just curious, Do you have a vicarious interest in this topic or are you thinking of getting back in the game?
He is living vicariously through Calipro. why?? I have no earthly idea... 8)
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I agree about the privacy settings about friends, and not letting people tag you or post on your timeline.
I never cared much about my privacy settings..(silly photos from the past don't bother me) but then I got 'tagged' in a couple ridiculous photos that had nothing to do with me...and then somebody else posted stupidity on the timeline....I still haven't changed the settings...but I can see why a guy might....or customize who can post what.....I just haven't bothered since I can manually remove stuff I don't like.
I wouldn't recommend Calipro's approach to facebook if one is looking for a "normal decent girl". A normal decent girl is going to be very suspicious of a man who doesn't allow any "likes" on his pictures, who never "likes" her pictures, who doesn't wish her a happy birthday on her mural, who never makes sweet comments about one of her pics. Also she will be very suspicious that it is a fake profile, especially if there isn't a nice profile pic of you. She would want to see pictures of you with your family and friends, showing that you are real. Also when she googles your "made up name" and finds nothing, she will be very suspicious. If you are using a fake name she will more than likely think that you are married, or have something serious to hide. Just keep it real and be yourself. I agree about the privacy settings about friends, and not letting people tag you or post on your timeline.
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This has got to be true for many ladies.....I would imagine one of their bigger fears would be a guy hiding a wife/family....and just using them for sex/good-times on a break a few times a year, while pretending to be 'in love'.
Fathertime!
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He is living vicariously through Calipro. why?? I have no earthly idea... 8)
Quit being such a jealous jackass...I'm not living vicariously through Calipro...I like to read/comment on stories I find interesting, his and several others are interesting to me....if anything, you devote most of your waking thoughts to calipro and how to take backhanded stabs at him.... I'm pretty sure he could kick your azz if he wanted to. :)
Fathertime!
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absolutely NO interest aside from discussion!
Fathertime!
Understood!
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Quit being such a jealous jackass...I'm not living vicariously through Calipro...I like to read/comment on stories I find interesting, his and several others are interesting to me....if anything, you devote most of your waking thoughts to calipro and how to take backhanded stabs at him.... I'm pretty sure he could kick your azz if he wanted to. :)
Fathertime!
uyyyyy ...I was just joking, hence the sunglasses....calm down....Kick my ass? oki doki
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Understood!
Hehe...I did notice Mudd's 8 year timeline...so I am coming up on 7 years exclusive so that is the danger zone! But seriously....I like hearing your stories, Calipro's, Awesomes, Expats, and several others....but I realize I'm not cut out to do many of things you all are doing...but for the right type of personality what a great life full of ladies the (somewhat) older guys can live in Colombia and other parts South! Juxtaposing it with the life many of my (somewhat) older single friends live in the states, it is a no-brainer where to go for the ladies....but very few are willing to step out and take that risk...
Fathertime!
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uyyyyy ...I was just joking, hence the sunglasses....calm down....Kick my ass? oki doki
sorry man...you know how I can get! 8)
Fathertime!
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sorry man...you know how I can get! 8)
Fathertime!
No problem FT, you're a good man.
Happy Easter!
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I locked down my Facebook. No one can tag me on pictures or make stupid comments on my wall. I even took the few pictures down I had up there. And replaced my profile photo with one of Julius Caesar. How did this affect my life? One less thing to worry about.
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I locked down my Facebook. No one can tag me on pictures or make stupid comments on my wall. I even took the few pictures down I had up there. And replaced my profile photo with one of Julius Caesar. How did this affect my life? One less thing to worry about.
Now that we're into April already, being Caesar should be OK for a while.
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Now that we're into April already, being Caesar should be OK for a while.
Haa! I didn't think of it that way. But history in the Classical era is very interesting.
So one of the reasons I locked my page down was my ex. She went so low as to put up a page posing as my daughter. There were times I was chatting with (who I thought) was my daughter. And then some of the responses were like, what? I know my daughter she wouldn't say that.
First time it happened I decided to let it slide. Then the next time I chatted it was more than obvious. It was not my daughter I was chatting with but my ex. So I stopped chatting with her (my ex) on Facebook. About 3 weeks later I got this long nasty message on Facebook, through the fake account. That erased any remaining doubt.
This experience illustrates how people use technology and social media to try and manipulate others. Even though there was never anything incriminating or embarrassing on my pages, I just don't like giving others the pleasure. I also had former employers snoop my page when I was working there etc etc. So if people want to snoop, all hail Caesar! lol
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She is not trying to attract attention as you assert, but her profile picture on this site is of her showing "deep cleavage"...ok, if you say so.
That's a good point!
I meant that compared to what a lot of women post on social media, she is not particularly attention seeking. You know - relatively speaking. However you are quite right about that picture.
Sorry if I was unclear.
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All this discussion about Facebook, simply confirms for me that I should stay away from Facebook.
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1,000 a day..that's it?
After seeing this second post, I can safely say you are being a wee bit too paranoid. How do you know they are just perving her? If you are so sure that cleavage is driving traffic, do a little experiment. Take those pictures off and see what happens. Or at least take that picture off of the front page.
It could simply be bots that are driving traffic too. Some websites will do stuff like that to make it look like there is a lot of traffic. I bet that 1,000 is not the true number of unique and real page views. It could be as small as 1/3 that.
The more I think about this, the more it seems like nothing to worry about. Your wife has the right attitude about the whole thing as well. And in the end, when did a little cleavage hurt anything?
She showed me again last night and I think it was it was 197,000. (Didn't look very closely, to be honest). So that's roughly 17,000 a week. Hence let's call it 2,000+ a day.
However I think you are right, it's nothing to worry about. As far as I know none of these people are contacting her. I'm sure she would mention that.
If it ever does get creepy she could change that profile picture.
Probably the only real risk is that someone might take her pictures and create a fake dating profile with her pictures or something like that. But I guess that sort of thing can happen to anyone. Anyone that posts pictures of themselves.
Women do have a certain vanity don't they? Well attractive, Latin ones anyway.
I think I got so bored of western women that don't take enough pride in how they present themselves, that I value this aspect in my wife. So if I'm honest with myself I don't want to crush this impulse in my wife.
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I think I got so bored of western women that don't take enough pride in how they present themselves, that I value this aspect in my wife. So if I'm honest with myself I don't want to crush this impulse in my wife.
There's a big difference between "take enough pride in how they present themselves", and putting in way too much effort to attract attention on the internet.
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There's a big difference between "take enough pride in how they present themselves", and putting in way too much effort to attract attention on the internet.
V-man should ask his wife to replace her profile picture (the one where she is displaying " deep cleavage") with one just showing her face, or one with bulky clothes. I promise she won't be getting many views at all. Unless the woman is a model seeking work, or an artist or entertainer, there is no reason to place racy pictures on a profile picture, especially when the woman is married. Of course the REAL reason women do it is to seek attention from other men. PERIOD.
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V-man should ask his wife to replace her profile picture (the one where she is displaying " deep cleavage") with one just showing her face, or one with bulky clothes. I promise she won't be getting many views at all. Unless the woman is a model seeking work, or an artist or entertainer, there is no reason to place racy pictures on a profile picture, especially when the woman is married. Of course the REAL reason women do it is to seek attention from other men. PERIOD.
Gotta agree there. If I was surfing on line and saw some hottie looking picture as a lead in, I'd probably click on it to see if there were similar pictures--wondering what it was all about. If instead I came across needle point tips and muffin recipes, that'd be the end of my interest. So that said, if there's guys coming back repeatedly and scoping, I'd imagine that it's not just window dressing at the door, that there's something a bit more enticing than what you'd find in 'The Ladies Home Journal' or in 'Good House Keeping' magazine. I have no idea of how it's set up, so I wouldn't even say that statement is rational conjecture, but a lot of big telemarketing outfits promising riches don't get anywhere near 200K hits.
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I think it has a lot to do with what the woman is wearing. Living in the tropical part of Colombia, our women wear very little. If they have the body for it the wear short shorts, mini skirts and -dresses and low cut blouses and dresses all year round. Many guys from colder climates as far away as Chile or from countries where women have to be more covered up by custom or law or due to low temps, seldom get to see this in everyday life and are all over the pictures of women from these regions. How exited they get is anybodies guess.
And then there are women who thrive on showing off their bodies with the least bit of clothing and getting men's attention. Not unusual for a colombiana.
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I think it has a lot to do with what the woman is wearing. Living in the tropical part of Colombia, our women wear very little. If they have the body for it the wear short shorts, mini skirts and -dresses and low cut blouses and dresses all year round. Many guys from colder climates as far away as Chile or from countries where women have to be more covered up by custom or law or due to low temps, seldom get to see this in everyday life and are all over the pictures of women from these regions. How exited they get is anybodies guess.
And then there are women who thrive on showing off their bodies with the least bit of clothing and getting men's attention. Not unusual for a colombiana.
I can get as worked up seeing a chick in tight jeans and a tight sweater as I can one in a thong bikini. Thank God for sun glasses. At least I don't have to see possible cellulite and stretch marks.
One of the reasons why lingerie sells is because it leaves something to the imagination.
I like unwrapping gifts....(sometimes with my teeth) ;)