It appears you have not registered with our community. To register please click here ...

+-

+-PL Gallery Random Image


Author Topic: Confusion  (Read 13727 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline mambocowboy

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 1528
  • Country: 00
  • Spouse's Country: Colombia
  • Status: Married >5 years
  • Trips: 4 - 10
Re: Confusion
« Reply #50 on: March 24, 2017, 12:34:38 PM »
Well to me it is quite obvious this WOVO stuff sucks big time. It´s insanity to gey so wound up in a woman you havent even met. Absolute insanity..
+1. The best cure is getting laid on a regular basis

Offline Fosgate5

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 173
  • Spouse's Country: No Selection
  • Status: Looking 0-2 years
  • Trips: None (yet)
Re: Confusion
« Reply #51 on: March 26, 2017, 10:23:56 AM »
Just an update to all.  She and I have decided to take a break, per my suggestion. she was getting overwhelmed with a lot of things between family and work and me.  So, she accepted the proposal of taking a break.  I'm unsure for how long, we didn't go over that.  She was pretty emotional about it.  I reached out to her friend and advised her friend to comfort her.  But her friend said she was too emotional to talk about it.  She's been so overwhelmed lately and I'm hoping this break (at least one thing off her plate ) will help.  I'm still going there in July though.  In the meantime, trying to respect her space and not reach out to her at all.  Just waiting for her to reach out to me.  I know she's hurting, I am as well.  Hoping this will be good for both of us, and strengthen our bond.  Of course, I humbly admit to all of you, I'm scared.


Cashing in my 2 cents for free. :) Intuition is one thing. It's good that you didn't ignore the red flag. However, take this into account. The Philippines is a country that the city of Manila was once considered "The Jewel of the Philippines" prior to Japanese occupation and Liberation by the United States. There is a quote in the book others mention. "The Philippines was raised in a monastery for 300 years and Hollywood for the last 50." The book really helps you understand the family member roles, how those roles came about and the pressure in their culture to fulfill those roles. Take the time and I would suggest if you have a smartphone get the Kindle app and purchase the digital copy of that book so it is on your phone and you can pickup where you left off at any given time and it has useful links etc for you when you go to the Philippines (reading material during the plane trip if anything). For me the book was an eye opener. Yes you may have a woman with some esteem issues right now. That does not make it a bad choice. Where american women may really have some emotional issues of not getting along with people, rejection brought of by feminism, weight control etc. I don't really see a whole lot of american women in the dating scene with poverty issues. People here say the work in a [snip] hole. Think of what a [snip] hole of a place or [snip]ty boss in the Philippines must be like with their labor laws. Many people may be dealing with some serious poverty issues, crappy job, crappy boss, pressure of family to get married, trying to figure out where tomorrows meal is coming from, Are they going to get kicked out on the street tomorrow etc. They look to dating an American as a way to a better life and brighter future to fulfill their desire to have a family they can love and support.


I have read how others have had women not share how bad it really was, living with other women but never complained of their situation and never asked for anything to help support. Then there are others out to separate you from your money and nothing more as their way to survive. My intuition that she is not the later.


My intuition tells me that she is in hard times for a Filipino, issues (maybe health, or pressure from family) to marry or be successful and at the same time she is getting squeezed at a job which is the only thing she could find with her skill set. Take this and what you know about the nature of people. Some women even here in the U.S. cannot stand being alone and are nervous wrecks without a man by their side as their pillar of support. I've know several women here in the U.S. that are exactly like that and you would never know how they could not handle the pressure of being single. The woman you have picked has rejected money from you and that is a positive sign that she is not out for money from you. Life is tough and marriage is tough and never a fairy tale. It is in their courting that some will fein lack of interest etc as a test for you! (also in the book) Are you going to fight for her and love her more by being her pillar? This is a common belief not only there but here as well. I don't know man, but if you truly care for her I would not give up so freely. Yes you have a warning flag that popped up, Figure out a way past that, she may fear you seeing where she lives, dresses, etc but the bottom line it is not always about you and what she can do for you. What can you do for her, what can you do for each other? If you find a way past this you and her could very well be the best thing that happened to each other, but you need to express that you both will find a way past this. Kick yourself in the ass, get going and get on the plane to go see her while the plane tickets now are cheap. Maybe that will calm both your fears.   

Offline robert angel

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 6176
  • Country: us
  • Gender: Male
  • Summer 18
  • Spouse's Country: The Philippines
  • Status: Married >5 years
  • Trips: 4 - 10
Re: Confusion
« Reply #52 on: March 26, 2017, 01:33:01 PM »

Cashing in my 2 cents for free. :) Intuition is one thing. It's good that you didn't ignore the red flag. However, take this into account. The Philippines is a country that the city of Manila was once considered "The Jewel of the Philippines" prior to Japanese occupation and Liberation by the United States. There is a quote in the book others mention. "The Philippines was raised in a monastery for 300 years and Hollywood for the last 50." The book really helps you understand the family member roles, how those roles came about and the pressure in their culture to fulfill those roles. Take the time and I would suggest if you have a smartphone get the Kindle app and purchase the digital copy of that book so it is on your phone and you can pickup where you left off at any given time and it has useful links etc for you when you go to the Philippines (reading material during the plane trip if anything). For me the book was an eye opener. Yes you may have a woman with some esteem issues right now. That does not make it a bad choice. Where american women may really have some emotional issues of not getting along with people, rejection brought of by feminism, weight control etc. I don't really see a whole lot of american women in the dating scene with poverty issues. People here say the work in a [snip] hole. Think of what a [snip] hole of a place or [snip]ty boss in the Philippines must be like with their labor laws. Many people may be dealing with some serious poverty issues, crappy job, crappy boss, pressure of family to get married, trying to figure out where tomorrows meal is coming from, Are they going to get kicked out on the street tomorrow etc. They look to dating an American as a way to a better life and brighter future to fulfill their desire to have a family they can love and support.


I have read how others have had women not share how bad it really was, living with other women but never complained of their situation and never asked for anything to help support. Then there are others out to separate you from your money and nothing more as their way to survive. My intuition that she is not the later.


My intuition tells me that she is in hard times for a Filipino, issues (maybe health, or pressure from family) to marry or be successful and at the same time she is getting squeezed at a job which is the only thing she could find with her skill set. Take this and what you know about the nature of people. Some women even here in the U.S. cannot stand being alone and are nervous wrecks without a man by their side as their pillar of support. I've know several women here in the U.S. that are exactly like that and you would never know how they could not handle the pressure of being single. The woman you have picked has rejected money from you and that is a positive sign that she is not out for money from you. Life is tough and marriage is tough and never a fairy tale. It is in their courting that some will fein lack of interest etc as a test for you! (also in the book) Are you going to fight for her and love her more by being her pillar? This is a common belief not only there but here as well. I don't know man, but if you truly care for her I would not give up so freely. Yes you have a warning flag that popped up, Figure out a way past that, she may fear you seeing where she lives, dresses, etc but the bottom line it is not always about you and what she can do for you. What can you do for her, what can you do for each other? If you find a way past this you and her could very well be the best thing that happened to each other, but you need to express that you both will find a way past this. Kick yourself in the ass, get going and get on the plane to go see her while the plane tickets now are cheap. Maybe that will calm both your fears.

Excellent post, Fos!!


 Actually going to Taiwan and seeing, being with her, will speak volume's about how real you really are. You'll both be in a far better situation to decide whether and where to go from there. If it's not meant to be, you still have probably thirty+ million Filipinas to start over with. And you're only thirty? You've easily got 15 years worth of 'prime time' status as choice husband material status as things presently stand over there. Some might view thirty as even being bit young for a guy to be capable enough to 'settle down' sufficiently.

Most of those jobs overseas offer Filipinos one day off a week and a 'vacation' of even a few days can be hard to get. Sometimes it's limited by production schedules. But by you committing to go, especially if you're telling her she's the only woman you're going there tho see, I'd  think it only fair for you to ask her to request some time off as soon as you know what days you'll be there. I'd imagine her having you travel all the way to see just her would make her the envy of many Filipinas. Otherwise, if she's working twelve hour shifts, it might be disappointng.

Often, you can gauge a Filipina by the qualities of her closest friends. You're kinda 'stuck' with the family life gave you, some great, usually 1 or 2 'black sheep' bringing down the good famiy name, but you CHOOSE your friends.

Most guys play these women online by the dozens, hoping to see some skin via free cam show, never getting on the plane,  never even truly intending to. Some do go, only to whore around, island hopping. The attention the guys get artificially boosts their egos.  Nonetheless, they'll make promises maybe even sending cheap lingerie or pocket change, trying to paint pretty, optimistic but false pictures, misleading these women's minds and lives. They've gotten wise and cynical.Can we blame them? Some resort to playing the same games on us.

I think you said she's the eldest daughter. That means a LOT in Filipina culture. She's part sister, part Mother to the younger siblings. My wife's sweet and generally reserved, but if one of her sibling's does wrong, doesn't share with family or is God forbid, rude to their Mother, the ways she he gets loud and lights into them, tearing them a second [snip], makes me glad I don't understand the language.  'Intense' is an inadequate word.

My wife's the eldest sister and she paid the extra medical costs for her Father not covered by their national health insurance 'Filcare', then eventually for his funeral last year,. More significantly economically, she's put five siblings through college, paying for books, tuition, exams, (exams are a separate cost there) food, lodging and their spending allowances. In the city, they live in the house we purchased in our names.

Today, her younger siblings are nurses, merchant mariners, business degree holders and all went to better schools, but my wife (and indirectly me) sacrificed a LOT of things. We'd both in be driving cars with less than 130,000 miles on them and would've had a few trips to Europe without those expenses.Still, she's helped a lot with household expenses here in the USA. But she'd be driving a new, fully paid for Honda Accord if we hadn't bought the house over there.

I'm looking to retire early in a year or two and she's all about it, yet wanting to keep working her corporate job. That'll shore up our income but give her 4--5 weeks a year at least, to travel wherever.

A good Filipina will let you be 'the man'--to make the big decisions (or at least almost invisibly 'coach' the situation, so that you THINK you're making the decisions) will ask for your approval on many things, even if just an 'old school' traditional formality. My wife asks me all the time if her outfit for work might be too sexy, if when she wears lipstick (rarely) if the shade's OK.  She asks if she can go out with lady friends, none of that "Honey, I'm going out with the girls to eat". If I say 'no' that's 'it'.

But if you fall ill, lose your job and can't provide, a good Filipina will stick by you, roll up her sleeves and do whatever it takes to keep the both of you going, be it couple, family, whatever. Not a 'Fairweather only' wife, should you choose correctly. 

I find many Filipinas put their family, inc. Husband and sometimes somewhat sadly IMO,  even their co worker/employee's interests ahead of their own. They're often 'for the 'good of the group' rather than all about 'me, me and me'.

That's different than the amount of self centeredness you see a lot in women from other countries, especially after they've been in the USA a few years and have met some 'jaded', less well grounded
'friends' from their own country, ready to divorce and 'move up' the ladder, using you as a stepping stone .

Imagine this conversational scenario I've seen play out too many times: """ Why are you STILL with HIM?---you've been here two years, so you're scott free to stay in the USA no matter what--- you CAN have it sooo much better---screw his rules and his dorky looks, and screw OTHER  guys instead--you would look HOT in red lip stick and a little black dress and HE'LL still pay you monthly alimony,  child support, pay for you to finish college and you can have a LOT more fun---here's MY lawyer's card, he eats guys like your husband for breakfast, so you can have a maid, paid day care, a nice car, money, wear designer clothes  always have mainicures, not cook anymore and only eat at the best restuarants"""" --"""And, oh--silly me---I almost forgot, he'll pay for YOUR lawyer too....""" 

Gotta love the USA, eh, guys?

But no matter how 'anti divorce/traditional' she is--- don't underestimate the 'little lady'--thinking she can't or won't try to make it without you. if you're a drunk, druggie or philanderer and don't straighten up, she'll cut you loose, even if it means taking the kids and she WILL make it on her own.

But as loving, wonderful, generous and selfless as my wife's been to her family, she's been even more so to me. She's also been a great step Mom for my two sons, offering me great advice on raising them right, quick to give them an extra $50 or so for their birthdays, Christmas etc., even encouraging me to not chop off their heads occasionally... 'Beauty and the Beast' indeed, or 'Shrek and Fiona'. LOL.

With her siblings all educated, independent (finally!!) and all in part, contributing to help spoil their widowed Mom a wee bit (massage, beauty parlor) , now we can more realistically map out plans for ourselves, to go to places like Spain, Paris, Florence and Switzerland. (I already took her to Detroit, Michigan)

By putting them through school, she did the equivalent of instead of buying them fish every day for the rest of their (our) lives, to getting them a small boat, fishing poles and nets, teaching them how to fish and feed themselves for the rest of their lives, build their own futures.

So if she's the eldest sister or the only one with a good paying job, realize that especially if she's --and I dare say 'traditional' --that you ought to be aware of the above.

What some guys might see as a negative, namely helping out her family, others might see as signs of a 'True Blue' Filipina, with old fashioned values, values and traits ---things that will apply to you as well, if you're her husband.
« Last Edit: March 26, 2017, 05:18:32 PM by robert angel »
Whether you think you can or think you can't--you're right!

Planet-Love.com

Re: Confusion
« Reply #52 on: March 26, 2017, 01:33:01 PM »

Offline Jimmyhopes

  • New Member
  • *
  • Posts: 25
  • Spouse's Country: Other Asian
  • Status: Committed 0-1 year
  • Trips: None (yet)
Re: Confusion
« Reply #53 on: March 26, 2017, 02:51:18 PM »
Excellent post, Fos!!


 Actually going to Taiwan and seeing, being with her, will speak volume's about how real you really are. You'll both be in a far better situation to decide whether and where to go from there. If it's not meant to be, you still have probably thirty+ million Filipinas to start over with. And you're only thirty? You've easily got 15 years worth of 'prime time' status as choice husband material status as things presently stand over there. Some might view thirty as even being bit young for a guy to be capable enough to 'settle down' sufficiently.

Most of those jobs overseas offer Filipinos one day off a week and a 'vacation' of even a few days can be hard to get. Sometimes it's limited by production schedules. But by you committing to go, especially if you're telling her she's the only woman you're going there tho see, I'd  think it only fair for you to ask her to request some time off as soon as you know what days you'll be there. I'd imagine her having you travel all the way to see just her would make her the envy of many Filipinas. Otherwise, if she's working twelve hour shifts, it might be disappointng.

Often, you can gauge a Filipina by the qualities of her closest friends.

Most guys play these women online by the dozens, hoping to see some skin, never getting on the plane,  never even truly intending to. Some do go, only to whore around, island hopping. The attention the guys get artificially boosts their egos.  Nonetheless, they'll make promises and try to paint pretty, optimistic pictures, misleading these women's minds and lives. They've gotten wise and cynical.Can we blame them? Some resort to playing the same games on us.

I think you said she's the eldest daughter. That means a LOT in Filipina culture. She's part sister, part Mother to the younger siblings. My wife's the eldest sister and she paid the extra medical costs for her Father not covered by their national health insurance 'Filcare', then eventually for his funeral last year,. More significantly economically, she's put five siblings through college, paying for books, tuition, exams, (exams are a separate cost there) food, lodging and their spending allowances.

Today, her younger siblings are nurses, merchant mariners, business degree holders and all went to better schools, but my wife (and indirectly me) sacrificed a LOT of things. We'd both in be driving cars with less than 130,000 miles on them and would've had a few trips to Europe without those expenses.Still, she's helped a lot with household expenses here in the USA.

I'm looking to retire early in a year or two and she's all about it, yet wanting to keep working her corporate job. That'll shore up our income but give her 4--5 weeks a year at least, to travel wherever.

A good Filipina will let you be 'the man'--to make the big decisions (or at least almost invisibly 'coach' the situation so that you THINK you're making the decisions) will ask for your approval on many things, even if just an 'old school' traditional formality--- but if you fall ill, lose your job and can't provide, she'll stick by you, roll up her sleeves and do whatever it takes to keep the both of you going, be it couple, family, whatever. Not a 'Fairweather only' wife, should you choose correctly. 

But don't underestimate the 'little lady'--thinking she can't make it without you. if you're a drunk, druggie or philanderer and don't straighten up,  she'll cut you loose and WILL make it on her own.

But as loving, wonderful, generous and selfless as my wife's been to her family, she's been even more so to me. She's also been a great step Mom for my two sons, offering me great advice on raising them right, quick to give them an extra $50 or so for their birthdays, Christmas etc., even encouraging me to not chop off their heads occasionally...

With her siblings all educated, independent (finally!!) and all in part, contributing to help spoil their widowed Mom a wee bit (massage, beauty parlor) , now we can more realistically map out plans for ourselves, to go to places like Spain, Paris, Florence and Switzerland. (I already took her to Detroit, Michigan)

By putting them through school, she did the equivalent of instead of buying them fish every day for the rest of their (our) lives, to getting them a small boat, fishing poles and nets, teaching them how to fish and feed themselves for the rest of their lives, build their own futures.

So if she's the eldest sister or the only one with a good paying job, realize that especially if she's --and I dare say 'traditional' --that you ought to be aware of the above.

What some guys might see as a negative, namely helping out her family, others might see as signs of a 'True Blue' Filipina, with old fashioned values, values and traits that will apply to you as well, if you're her husband.

You just described her to a t almost.  Yes, she agreed to get time off for when I go see her.  We're still on a break and I'm hoping she still wants to get to know me.  Haven't really heard anything. 
Yes, I know all of that about her and her family and frankly, I can honestly say I admire it and love that about her.  I have so much respect for her and know that if she and I do actually move forward, I'm prepared (mentally and emotionally at least) to be with her, no matter what, to help her and her (our ) family. 
I see a lot of commonalities between the way I was raised and her culture and the way she was raised.

Anyway, last I knew, she still wanted me to go see her. And her friends were eager to meet me as well.  She said without a doubt she will be requesting time off.

As far as the time out...this is new uncharted territory for me.  Don't know what to do or what I'm supposed to do.  The fella before said I should fought for her, which, I want to do.  But I Don't know how to properly so as to not disrespect her.  She messaged me last night saying, "have a good night.  Hope you're doing well.  God bless you always." I responded with a similar message and told her that I miss her and sorry if I hurt her.  She responded with a smiley face.
I keep hearing that breaks are really just break ups.  Only thing I keep telling myself is that she never asked for a break.  I suggested it and she accepted it.  That's not the same, right?  Her best friend has spoken to me  (i mentioned her before) and told me this morning that she finally had a chance to talk to her and will update me later. so, I guess we'll see.

She better still want to see me!  Ticket is non refundable!  :-P

Anyway, typing on a phone sucks.  If I missed anything or you guys have questions, let me know what I can clear up.

Offline robert angel

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 6176
  • Country: us
  • Gender: Male
  • Summer 18
  • Spouse's Country: The Philippines
  • Status: Married >5 years
  • Trips: 4 - 10
Re: Confusion
« Reply #54 on: March 26, 2017, 04:09:15 PM »
She sounds sweet and real, but it's so hard for me to accurately 'read' the situation. Really it'd be unfair for me to come right out and say 'do this or do that'. 'Confused' all too often is a component of affairs of the heart. Decisions, decisions...

I was once intensely involved with a wonderful Filipina for as I recall about a year. Hours everynight on cam. She was pretty and witty, smart beyond her years. Then with unrefundable tickets, we broke up a few weeks before I went to the Philippines.

Being the good person, of admirable character she was and still is, she still took time off from work, showing me all over mega, mega sized Manila, while making it clear I was still a free agent to see other women there. Bittersweet. So as much as I'd have loved to, I never was able to be more intimate than giving her a kiss on the cheek. My only regret besides the obvious, was she wasn't able to fix me up with her incredibly beautiful, yet sweet cousin, even though she was in a doomed relationship with another guy we realized was a bum and tried to tell her, yet she was unable to see it.

So after about a week, I fell in with another lady I had come to know earlier and spent a week with her instead, traveling from Manila to her home city, Cebu City. Thought of marrying her, but her insecurities,  jealousy and a couple other flags told me 'nice lady, but 'NO' not asawa  ( Pilipina for spouse) material..

You know what? The first lady I mentioned,  she and my wife, while not being 'tight, close' friends and never having met in person, --are facebook friends!!! So my wife and her have kept up on each other over the years, with her having a family, kids and living in Greece with a great guy, and her watching my wife and I here in the USA. I don't correspond with her or her husband, as that could maybe get awkward, (Greeks, Macedonians can be very territorial) but it's ALL good!

One, actually two things I can feel safe telling you is: If she's a nice person and unmarried, don't burn your bridges. You never know down the line. Maybe she has a friend, or a friend has a friend.... You could break up and 2 or 3 relationships later, decide that you were meant to be after all. That's how it happened with my wife and I after initially meeting.

Second, get in the mindset that you're going to and you WILL, have a great vacation, experiencing  things you never imagined. Taiwan isn't all computer semi conductor and memory chip factories. There's (as I understand it) nice, even 'resort' type places, beaches I think----places to go, things to do that don't cost a fortune. Do a little homework there.

If Taiwan's anything like Hong Kong, on Sunday, in the parks, malls and bars, there will be a million Filipinas, enjoying their ---only day off, so if 'unattached'---- get up early and bring a little pad and pen!

Going in as you are, maybe it'd help to think "I might end up sad, feeling like I'm sucking lemons, but damn it, if it turns out like that, I'm gonna make some tasty lemonade,  see the place and have me some FUN!!!" Taiwan's very safe and orderly.

 I remembered when my relationship fell apart as mentioned above, overthinking, imagining the worst, thinking I'd stay I'm my hotel room the entire time, having to watch TV in a foreign language, all alone. I did briefly turn the TV on. The first show was the Brady Bunch. Second, also shown in English was Oprah Winfrey....

Get your butt out there no matter what. Be assertive without being pompous and represent our country well, please.


I edited a bit my post above and perhaps unnecessarily,  added a 'scare the living sh!t out of you' worst case scenario paragraph, as a precaution as to what can happen to the hasty and naive. Her sister might've been a bit of a nuisance, a glad hander, but most families have at least one or two like that, here or there.

You can't choose your family, but you can choose your friends and they'll both probably reveal something about her. She certainly doesn't seem to fit the role of green card shark and her friends are probably OK too--you indicated one has already tried to help the both of you out, which sounds positive. Don't make too many promises. Be true to yourself.
Whether you think you can or think you can't--you're right!

Offline Jimmyhopes

  • New Member
  • *
  • Posts: 25
  • Spouse's Country: Other Asian
  • Status: Committed 0-1 year
  • Trips: None (yet)
Re: Confusion
« Reply #55 on: April 06, 2017, 08:22:21 AM »
Okay, I read the book, finished it last night. It was good. Very interesting.

Offline Elexpatriado

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 3459
  • Spouse's Country: No Selection
  • Status: Looking 0-2 years
  • Trips: Resident
Re: Confusion
« Reply #56 on: April 06, 2017, 01:17:30 PM »
Okay, I read the book, finished it last night. It was good. Very interesting.


Okay, now read CaliPros book :)

Offline Jimmyhopes

  • New Member
  • *
  • Posts: 25
  • Spouse's Country: Other Asian
  • Status: Committed 0-1 year
  • Trips: None (yet)
Re: Confusion
« Reply #57 on: April 10, 2017, 11:30:43 AM »
Update: i ended it with her.  Show's over folks.  Thanks for playing along.

Offline robert angel

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 6176
  • Country: us
  • Gender: Male
  • Summer 18
  • Spouse's Country: The Philippines
  • Status: Married >5 years
  • Trips: 4 - 10
Re: Confusion
« Reply #58 on: April 10, 2017, 06:10:53 PM »
Make lemonade out of the lemon. You already have tickets to Taiwan and a couple months to set up plans to see places, and to set up some dates with the 100's of 1000's of overseas workers there, as well as with Taiwanese nationals. Refocus and energize, trying to look forward, rather than at the past.
Whether you think you can or think you can't--you're right!

Offline Jimmyhopes

  • New Member
  • *
  • Posts: 25
  • Spouse's Country: Other Asian
  • Status: Committed 0-1 year
  • Trips: None (yet)
Re: Confusion
« Reply #59 on: April 11, 2017, 06:46:45 PM »
I'm going to try doing some business out of Taiwan. That way it'll make sense for me to go over there.
As for setting up dates. Not interested. Wouldn't really know how to go about it anyway. I think I'm done with Asians. My ex was an Asian from Singapore. This one was of course Filipino. Burned by both. I never really sought either of them out, and I guess if I end up with another it'll be coincidence.

Offline robert angel

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 6176
  • Country: us
  • Gender: Male
  • Summer 18
  • Spouse's Country: The Philippines
  • Status: Married >5 years
  • Trips: 4 - 10
Re: Confusion
« Reply #60 on: April 11, 2017, 07:27:08 PM »
I'm going to try doing some business out of Taiwan. That way it'll make sense for me to go over there.
As for setting up dates. Not interested. Wouldn't really know how to go about it anyway. I think I'm done with Asians. My ex was an Asian from Singapore. This one was of course Filipino. Burned by both. I never really sought either of them out, and I guess if I end up with another it'll be coincidence.

If there's such a bad taste left in your mouth, so to speak from all this, it's understandable.  That said, there are free sites like dateinasia,  plentyoffish and I'm sure others as well. Then there's some that would for a reasonable fee, allow you to join by the month. I'll bet there's plenty of members who are from Taiwan on those sites. What harm is there in talking with some women about meetng at Starbucks or over lunch?

Might be hard for you right now, but I think it's inevitable that you'll get over this sooner or later and about 'getting back in the water'--so you might just want think a bit more about at least getting your feet wet, seeing how you are going there anyway. Just my two cents. Regardless, good luck.
Whether you think you can or think you can't--you're right!

Offline Jimmyhopes

  • New Member
  • *
  • Posts: 25
  • Spouse's Country: Other Asian
  • Status: Committed 0-1 year
  • Trips: None (yet)
Re: Confusion
« Reply #61 on: April 11, 2017, 07:46:00 PM »
You're right, I will get through this.  It's still fresh is all.  So hard to find any good women anymore.  And where I live, it's nearly impossible unless you are a marine.  The male to female ratio here is so incredibly unbalanced, a civilian, chubby, balding guy....has no chance.  Haha.

Offline utopiacowboy

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 3891
  • Country: us
  • Spouse's Country: Colombia
  • Status: Married >5 years
  • Trips: > 10
Re: Confusion
« Reply #62 on: April 12, 2017, 09:08:42 AM »
You're right, I will get through this.  It's still fresh is all.  So hard to find any good women anymore.  And where I live, it's nearly impossible unless you are a marine.  The male to female ratio here is so incredibly unbalanced, a civilian, chubby, balding guy....has no chance.  Haha.


I'm sure that you are in a funk about what happened but it will pass. Everyone wants a relationship but I must say having had two wives that my most satisfying relationships are with my children and grandchildren. If I were single I would never get married again and just use escorts for sex.

Planet-Love.com

Re: Confusion
« Reply #62 on: April 12, 2017, 09:08:42 AM »

Offline Fosgate5

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 173
  • Spouse's Country: No Selection
  • Status: Looking 0-2 years
  • Trips: None (yet)
Re: Confusion
« Reply #63 on: April 13, 2017, 06:11:02 AM »
If I were single I would never get married again and just use escorts for sex.


That's not even safe anymore in this day and age. Risk of robbery, arrest etc. Professional jobs often run background checks. All you need is an arrest for prostitution related to come up and damn your character for a new job, working a deal etc.

 

Sponsor Twr1R

PL Stats

Members
Total Members: 5871
Latest: ponttbryr
New This Month: 1
New This Week: 0
New Today: 0
Stats
Total Posts: 133128
Total Topics: 7864
Most Online Today: 338
Most Online Ever: 1000
(December 26, 2022, 11:57:37 PM)
Users Online
Members: 0
Guests: 331
Total: 331
Powered by EzPortal